


Time Told Through Text

by sunshineScavenger



Category: Homestuck, 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
Genre: Chatlogs, Chatting & Messaging, F/F, F/M, Fuck Mineta Honestly, It's mostly chats but I'll add an insert here or there, M/M, Mineta Minoru is Expelled from U.A. High School, Multi, Other, Pesterlog(s) (Homestuck), There is... so much fucking formatting in this, expect no regular updates, pet project, please be kind formatting is hell, slowburn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-11
Updated: 2019-04-21
Packaged: 2019-11-15 04:57:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 35,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18067013
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunshineScavenger/pseuds/sunshineScavenger
Summary: TE: fight meRR: -< Please do not fight him. >-AQ: i'll fight himRR: -< Sero, Kaminari, stop your girlfriend. >-AT: o_ i'll fight him too _oRR: -< I swear to Momo- >-





	1. (;<

**Author's Note:**

> Okay! This is my first hat thrown in the chatfic ring, and I am very excited!!! We need more pesterlog chats. In case you didn't read the tags, I have no plan of updating this regularly, as formatting it is literal hell (I mean it) and also my mental state fluctuates at any given moment. Bear with me if you enjoy it, I have more planned.
> 
> For the sake of shenanigans, I'm switching up canon a bit. After the attack at USJ (and before the summer training camp and internships) UA decided to switch to a dorm system for the students' safety. Everything that happens in this chapter takes place before or during the Sports Festival.

\-- alienQueen [AQ] began pestering averagedTape [AT] –-  
AQ: (:<   
AT: why didn’t you tell me pesterchum was a real thing!! I feel betrayed  
AQ: i didnt know until like a week ago calm down  
AT: wait, can you set up quirks on here?  
AQ: typing quirks or quirk quirks  
AT: typing quirks, dumbass.  
AQ: wow rude  
AQ: and yeah you can  
AQ: hence the lack of punctuation  
AT: o_ sweet. _o  
AQ: are those supposed to be your elbows holy shit  
AT: o_ i thought it was original! _o  
AQ: it is its just also the dorkiest thing  
AQ: im fuckign whipped  
AT: o_ im not sure whether i should hug or punch you _o  
AQ: i would prefer a hug  
AT: o_ ill be there in 10 _o  
AQ: <3!!  
AT: o_ <3! _o  
\-- alienQueen [AQ] ceased pestering averagedTape [AT] –-  
   
\-- averagedTape [AT] began pestering alienQueen [AQ]–-  
AT: o_ i love our boyfriend with all of my heart but he’s such a fucking dumbass _o  
AQ: what did he do this time  
AT: o_ he made it about 30 pages into homestuck and got to the peanut allergy joke and he’s literally laughing so hard he’s crying on the ground. _o  
AQ: edhfbrkhftgnd,,,  
AQ: were all morosexual because were all fucking IdiotsTM  
AQ: take a picture so we can make fun of him later  
AT: o_ bold of you to assume i haven’t taken like 4 already. _o  
AQ: youre right  
AQ: god hes gonna love dave  
AT: o_ im imagining denki mixed with strider humor and im about 3 seconds away from death. _o  
AT: o_ wish me luck _o  
AQ: will do  
\-- averagedTape [AT] began pestering alienQueen [AQ]–-  
   
[<3 homestucks]  
\-- alienQueen [AQ] is now online –-  
AQ: if i wanted to cosplay as a fantroll all i would have to do is paint my skin and dye my hair  
AQ: ive got weird enough eyes that it wouldn’t be much of a stretch and my horns are orange so like,,  
AQ: get a tshirt and some paint and i could be an icon  
\-- electricalCharmer [EC] is now online –-  
EC: mina, it’s the middle of the night  
EC: go to sleep  
EC: please  
AQ: its dark and i have many ideas  
EC: did you take your meds  
AQ: ...  
AQ: maybe?  
AQ: im gonna go check  
EC: okay, thank you  
AQ: so as it turns out i did not  
AQ: my ideas are less now  
AQ: thank  
EC: goodnight, get some sleep, we have that field trip tommorrow  
AQ: oh that!! i wonder where were going  
EC: wonder tommorrow, well rested, on the bus  
AQ: fine fine ill sleep now  
AQ: gnight denki!!  
EC: gnight mina  
\-- alienQueen [AQ] is now idle –-  
\-- electricalCharmer [EC] is now idle –-  
   
\-- averagedTape [AT] began pestering electricalCharmer [EC]–-  
AT: denki  
AT: please where are you  
AT: the warp dude said that he just shoved you places  
AT: he doesn’t know our quirks so you’re probably fin  
AT: please answer  
AT: minas freaking out we just need a word, anything  
AT: they’re real villians this isn’t a training exercise  
AT: they’ve got aizawa-sensei oh god  
AT: please please please  
AT: thirteen and aizawa sensei and kiri and bakugou and jirou and yaomomo and where are you???  
AT: denki please pick up  
\-- electricalCharmer [EC]'s device short-circuited –-  
AT: no no no no pleas e no  
\-- averagedTape [AT] ceased pestering electricalCharmer [EC]–-  
   
[<3 homestucks]  
\-- electricalCharmer [EC] is now online –-  
EC: im so sorry  
AT: o_ DENKI _o  
AQ: what in the world would you have to be sorry about, you piece of shit  
AQ: you’re with recovery girl, right? im coming over  
EC: she said no visitors since she’s kind of busy  
AQ: im pulling girlfriend priveliges because you had us worried sick!!  
AT: o_ where did you end up? _o  
EC: at USJ, mentally, or with recovery girl  
AT: o_ yes _o  
EC: that rocky area with yaomomo and jirou, confused and a little dazed, the left dorms third cot over  
EC: im charging  
AT: o_ im with mina and we’re coming over because we’re all a little fucked up _o  
AQ: and by a little he means he got sliced and passed out from blood loss  
AT: o_ i did not! i passed out from shock and the blood loss contributed _o  
EC: bippity boppity back the fuck up  
EC: who hurt you  
AT: o_ warp asshole, it’s nothing. _o  
AT: o_ i need to get the bandages changed and then we’re both going over to you and talking about what happened _o  
EC: do we have to??  
AQ: yes  
AT: o_ if you didn’t read my panic-fueled messages it was pretty terrifying and i feel like we need time to unpack it _o  
EC: okay, that’s true, im still like 3 minutes away from an anxiety attack  
AT: o_ then we’ll be there in two _o  
EC: <3  
AQ: <3  
AT: o_ <3 _o  
\-- averagedTape [AT] is now idle –-  
\-- alienQueen [AQ] is now idle –-  
\-- electricalCharmer [EC] is now idle –-  
   
   
\-- invisibleAttacker [IA] began pestering proudTail [PT]–-  
IA: IS IT WORKING?  
PT: yeah its working  
PT: almost gave my computer a virus though  
IA: YOU KNOW I CAN’T BE BOTHERED TO FIND THE OFFICIAL WEBSITE  
PT: you’re going to infect your computer someday and i wont help you  
IA: I’M MORE TECH SAVVY THEN YOU THINK, OJIRO!!  
PT: yeah, yeah  
PT: thanks for covering for me in class, by the way  
IA: I STILL THINK YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE NEEDED ME TO COVER FOR YOU.  
PT: it’s embarassing!!  
IA: IT’S CUTE!!  
PT: which is why it’s embarassing!  
IA: NO ONE EVEN NOTICED, C’MON. IF YOU’RE GOING TO WAG YOUR TAIL EVERY TIME YOU’RE EXCITED SOMEONE’S GOING TO SEE EVENTUALLY!  
PT: shhhshshs  
PT: ill think about that later when im not gross and blushy  
PT: how do you navigate feelings so well??  
PT: not fair.  
IA: IT DOES HELP THAT PEOPLE CAN’T SEE WHEN I’M DOING SOMETHING PAINFULLY EMBARASSING.  
IA: ALSO, I DON’T CARE? IF PEOPLE ARE GOING TO BE WEIRD ABOUT STUFF I DO THEN THEY CAN LIKE, FUCK OFF.  
IA: IS THIS ABOUT THE TRIPPING OVER YOUR TAIL AROUND THAT CUTE BOY EARLIER?  
PT: what else would it be about hagakure  
IA: I DUNNO, I DON’T FOLLOW YOU AROUND ALL DAY.  
PT: okay, point  
PT: i don’t even like guys!!  
PT: this is w e i r d  
IA: HAS IT OCCURRED TO YOU, IN THIS PROCESS OF FEELINGS, THAT PERHAPS. YOU DO LIKE BOYS?  
IA: IT’S AN OPTION.  
PT: one i don’t particularly want to consider right now.  
PT: what if i do?? what does that mean?  
IA: YOUR POSSIBLE DATING POOL GETS BIGGER AND YOU ACCEPT A PART OF YOURSELF?  
PT: fhkbgrcncgmf not what i meant.  
PT: ive considered that i like guys before  
PT: this kind of thing has happened more than id like to admit  
PT: its just that,, like, what does this mean for my friendships?  
PT: does it mean i have a crush on someone if i get a little lightheaded when im near him or if i see him across the hallway and feel like i got stabbed in the gut?  
PT: is there a difference between liking guys and liking girls?  
PT: can I like both??  
PT: are my friends going to want to stay away from me because of it???  
PT: im just scared that it’s going to change something i don’t want changed.  
IA: MASHIRAO, LISTEN TO ME.  
IA: IT’S OKAY TO BE AFRAID OF CHANGING THINGS, OR BE WORRIED ABOUT HOW PEOPLE WILL REACT IF IT’S TRUE. THAT HAPPENS TO EVERYONE WHO GOES THROUGH THIS KIND OF PANIC.  
IA: THERE HAVE BEEN THREE SEPARATE GIRLS AND ONE GUY IN OUR CLASS WHO CAME TO ME IN A PANIC WITH THESE SAME ISSUES.  
IA: IGNORING THE ISSUE WON’T MAKE ATTRACTION JUST... GO AWAY. IT JUST MAKES THE PROBLEM FESTER SOMEWHERE IN THE BACK OF YOUR MIND.  
IA: FESTERING THINGS NEVER GO WELL.  
IA: WORST CASE SCENARIO, YOU LOSE AN ASSHOLE FRIEND OR TWO AND MINETA THINKS YOU’RE GROSS.  
IA: BEST CASE SCENARIO, EVERYONE RIGHTFULLY ACCEPTS YOU AND I’M SURE HALF THE CLASS AND YOU LIVE A HAPPY LIFE.  
IA: WHATEVER THE CASE IS, IT’S BETTER TO MAYBE THINK LONG AND HARD ABOUT WHAT YOU THINK IS HAPPENING AND IF MAYBE YOU DO LIKE GUYS? THERE’S A PLETHORA OF CUTE BOYS AND GIRLS AT THIS SCHOOL, SO YOU HAVE A SHITTON OF TERRIBLE HIGH SCHOOL DATING OPTIONS.  
PT: ...  
PT: what did i do to deserve you, hagakure  
IA: PFFT, PLEASE, YESTERDAY I SAW A REALLY CUTE GIRL WATERING HER FLOWERS AND I TRIPPED OVER A TREE ROOT.  
PT: rjgtgln holy shit really  
IA: YES, REALLY, I HAVE HER NUMBER.  
PT: you go!! get that bread.  
PT: that bread being a cute girl with good flower care.  
IA: HA  
IA: WANT ME TO COME OVER? YOU CAN BLAB ABOUT THAT ONE WITH THE PURPLE HAIR YOU SAW IN THE CAFETERIA AND I CAN LOOK AT YOUR ENGLISH NOTES BECAUSE I STILL DON’T UNDERSTAND ANIMAL FARM.  
PT: yeah, that’d be nice.  
IA: OKAY! ILL BE THERE IN TEN.  
PT: (ᵔᴥᵔ)  
IA: SUPERB YOU FUNKY LITTLE HERO.  
\-- invisibleAttacker [IA] began pestering proudTail [PT}–-  
   
[<3 homestucks]  
\-- electricalCharmer [EC] is now online –-  
EC: sports festival, hell yeah!!  
EC: let’s kick ass and leave no survivors  
AQ: can we leave a few survivors  
EC: fine, kirishima and yaomomo and jirou can stay  
EC: everyone else dies.  
AT: o_ wow, harsh. _o  
AT: o_ not even the entirety of class 1A, huh _o  
EC: class 1A includes mineta so i can’t say that  
AT: o_ you have a point _o  
AQ: why the hell is he in class 1A anyway  
AT: o_ honestly i have no fucking clue _o  
EC: listen, he’s a decent fighter but a terrible person overall.  
AT: o_ he’s got one more incident before i just tape him inside a locker and leave him there. _o  
AQ: why not do it today  
AT: o_ and lose my chance at the sports festival? nah. _o  
AT: o_ if he does anything we’ll just report him and aizawa-sensei will pull him from the festival altogether. _o  
EC: how close are you guys to getting here?  
AQ: my trains arriving in five minutes and then its a quick walk  
AT: o_ oh, im already outside. they have crimson riot merch that kirishima missed and i’m getting some to surprise him _o  
AQ: how are you so nice all the time  
EC: haha whipped  
AQ: youre whipped too dont fake it  
EC: fuckign,, gottem, we’re both whipped  
AT: o_ nldnryefngkbg i love you both so fucking much. _o  
AT: o_ im coming inside, save a seat for me! _o  
EC: will do!  
\-- averagedTape [AT] is now idle –-  
   
\-- alienQueen [AQ] is now online –-  
AQ: i cannot believe we all made it to the second round im fuckign crying  
\-- alienQueen [AQ] is now idle –-  
   
\-- sunshineSurroundings [SS] began pestering fortunateCreation [FC]–-  
SS: You’re the one from class 1A with the creation quirk, correct?  
FC: << Excuse me? >>  
SS: I’m sorry if I come off as a bit brash, but I don’t have a huge amount of time.  
SS: You seemed close to the one with the earphone- headphone jack, things, on her ears?  
SS: I’m assuming that she has sensitive hearing.  
FC: << I- yes? >>  
SS: The next match features someone with an amplified vocal quirk that could possibly permenantly damage her hearing.  
FC: << Oh dear. >>  
SS: You’ll need to make or procure noise-canceling headphones or keep her a decent distance away. I just wanted to warn you.  
FC: << Of course, thank you! May I ask, is that amplified vocal quirk you? >>  
SS: ...  
SS: Ha, yeah, you got me. I want to try not to use it, but I’m up against zappy zappy and I can’t just punch him without getting electrocuted.  
FC: << Understandable. Kazeonsei-san, was it? I’m Yaoyorozu Momo. Thank you for the warning, and good luck! >>  
SS: Likewise for your match. I have confidence in your abilities!  
\-- sunshineSurroundings [SS] ceased pestering fortunateCreation [FC]–-  
   
\-- invisibleAttacker [IA] began pestering proudTail [PT]–-  
PT: i hate him i hate him i hate him i hate him so fucking much  
IA: FUCK  
PT: have i seriously been watching this stupid fucker across the cafeteria for a month?? really?? he looked so fucking sincere when he held out his hand and asked me to join his team and i  
PT: this is what i get when i like people, fuck  
PT: he stole my opportunity!! he stole my chance to make an example and why do i care so fucking much??  
PT: i could’ve just said fuck it and take the chance he gave me, because we won!! we won the cavalry battle! i could’ve gone on but i can’t because i hate it, i wanted to win for myself!!  
PT: i wanted to prove myself!  
PT: and now i CAN’T  
PT: BECAUSE THIS, STUPID CUTE BOY TOOK THAT CHANCE FROM ME  
PT: hhhhhhhshhh i can’t  
IA: HEY, DON’T BEAT YOURSELF UP OVER HAVING A SENSE OF PRIDE OVER THIS.  
IA: AND DON’T LIE, I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE DOING.  
IA: LISTEN TO ME MASHI. HE TOOK ADVANTAGE OF YOU AND YOU DON’T NEED TO FEEL LIKE IT’S YOUR FAULT THAT HE DID.  
IA: HOW WERE YOU SUPPOSED TO KNOW? WHAT WERE YOU SUPPOSED TO DO?  
PT: i know you’re right, but it still hurts  
PT: i don’t even know him but i feel betrayed  
PT: here, just, change the topic for now.  
IA: YOU SURE?  
PT: yeah, i need a distraction, it’s his match right now and midoriya’s a dumbass.  
IA: WHAT ELSE IS NEW?  
IA: OKAY, IF YOU WANT A DISTRACTION. YOU KNOW HOW DURING THE BATTLE IT WAS YOU, PURPLE HAIR, AOYAMA AND THAT GIRL WITH THE MUZZLE?  
PT: how is this changing the topic  
IA: BEAR WITH ME  
IA: SO MUZZLE IS GOING ON  
IA: THIS IS RELEVANT BECAUSE REMEMBER THAT GIRL WITH THE FLOWERS I KEEP MENTIONING?  
PT: no fucking way  
IA: YES FUCKING WAY, I’M FREAKING OUT  
PT: im crying this is ridiculous  
IA: SCHOOL NEVER CAME UP!! HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW?  
IA: I SAW HER DURING THE RACE ALL FLYING ACROSS THE FIELD WITH SHEER STRENGTH, HAIR FLYING, AND I’M SO IN LOVE IT’S KILLING ME INSIDE  
PT: why didn’t you tell me she was buff as all hell  
IA: SHE GARDENS AND WEARS REALLY FLUFFY SWEATERS AND HAS A CAT, BUFFNESS NEVER OCCURRED TO ME UNTIL NOW.  
PT: why’s she muzzled? seems uncomfortable and near the end she was fighting to keep it on like her life depended on it.  
PT: she’s a little strange, actually. i didn’t know you were allowed to wear scarves.  
IA: I BET SHE APPLIED FOR THE SCARF AND THE MUZZLE. I NEVER SEE HER WITHOUT THEM.  
IA: THE SCARF IS BECAUSE SHE’S APPARENTLY GOT SOME KIND OF LEFTOVER LIZARD MUTATION AND GETS COLD REAL EASY.  
IA: THE MUZZLE’S PART OF HER ACTUAL QUIRK AND SHE WON’T TALK ABOUT IT. I DON’T PRESS.  
PT: how does she talk with it on?  
IA: SIGN LANGUAGE IS SUPER VERSATILE.  
PT: wait how did he brainwash her if she can’t respond.  
IA: HE DIDN’T.  
PT: i- what?  
IA: THEY LOOK LIKE FRIENDS. AFTER THE CAVALRY BATTLE?  
PT: oh shit, didn’t she just pick him up and carry him off?  
IA: YEAH  
PT: i don’t remember much, i was trying not to cry  
PT: how did you not notice she was buff??  
PT: it’s pretty fucking noticable.  
IA: YOU KNOW I’M A DUMBASS, LET ME LIVE.  
PT: finish up what you’re doing and come back to the box, her match is soon.  
PT: midoriya’s kicking shinsou’s ass and i am enjoying it.  
IA: OH, YOU INTO THE THAT KIND OF THING? ;)  
PT: just get up here, idiot  
IA: OKAY, OKAY!  
\-- invisibleAttacker [IA] ceased pestering proudTail [PT]–-  
   
\-- alienQueen [AQ] began pestering electricalCharmer [EC]–-  
AQ: good luck! i believe in you!!  
EC: calm down its not even my match yet  
AQ: i dunno, shinsou-kun is almost going to win.  
EC: huh, that’s fast. he’s the one with the brainwashing quirk, right?  
AQ: yeah!!  
EC: sweet, that’s a cool quirk  
EC: we got any info on that girl i’m going up against?  
AQ: honestly, nothing. the most sero and i can figure is some basic strength-enhancing quirk  
AQ: she’s buff enough for it to make sense  
EC: oh, sweet, then this should be easy! I’ll just zap and she’ll be out long enough for me to get out of my ‘my brain is fried and everything hurts’ stage  
AQ: don’t underestimate her, okay?  
AQ: we don’t know what that muzzle is for  
EC: oh, yeah, i forgot about that  
EC: maybe it’s mouth based transformation? like, a long tongue or something  
AQ: that wouldn’t explain why she has to wear a muzzle.  
AQ: maybe she’s super violent and has to wear it to protect people!!!  
AQ: nah  
AQ: hagakure’s vibrating in her seat next to me  
AQ: that never means anything good.  
EC: maybe she’s just excited for my victory!  
EC: ;)  
AQ: ha, yeah. we’re all going to be cheering for you!  
\-- alienQueen [AQ] ceased pestering electricalCharmer [EC]–-  
   
\-- sunshineSurroundings [SS] began pestering neuralNeko [NN]–-  
SS: How’s your back? That Midoriya did a number on you.  
NN: I’ll be fine. Your match is soon, right?  
SS: Yup! I’m up against that Zapados kid.  
SS: I might have to use my quirk.  
NN: I still don’t get why you’re so worried about it.  
SS: I don’t want to deafen him, Toshi-nii!!  
NN: You won’t. Your quirk is powerful, but do what you need to win.  
SS: You’re the one that thinks like that. I don’t want to permenantly damage possible classmates to win a school competition.  
SS: I already talked to someone in Class 1A to get that girl with the sensitive hearing headphones.  
NN: How are you always so nice?  
SS: ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯  
SS: Have you already apologized to that tail boy and his laser friend?  
NN: Yes?  
SS: You need to do it eventually.  
NN: I feel really bad about it! I don’t want to go anywhere near him or I am going to actually DieTM  
NN: Not laser kid, he’s a flashy foreign prick.  
SS: Wait, did you brainwash the same cute tail boy you were rambling about the other day?  
NN: ...  
NN: N- no?  
SS: fekjgrkefbgjtrhbgh  
SS: Buddy, you done fucked up.  
SS: If you ever want to talk to him in a friendly way again you need to apologize.  
SS: I’ll go with you after my match if you need me too.  
SS: Also!! Want to hear something awesome!!  
NN: I would like you there, yes.  
NN: How can I say no with two exclamation points?  
SS: The pink support student offered to make me a voice muffler!  
SS: I’ll be able to talk! Normally!  
: That’s fantastic, what the hell.  
NN: I thought you were being sarcastic!  
SS: Nope!!!! I’m genuinely motherfucking excited.  
SS: I have to go out now but I’ll meet up with you up there later, okay?  
NN: ‘Kay, good luck.  
SS: <>  
\-- sunshineSurroundings [SS] began pestering neuralNeko [NN]–-

**\--**  
   
Mina draped over the back of Denki’s abandoned chair as her boyfriend and the girl he was up against strode onto the arena. She almost missed which side he came out on, since the glint of golden hair was the same for both. Still, she thought smugly, his opponent didn’t stand a chance.  
   
Denki’s quirk might have a lot of drawbacks, but it was _powerful_. Everyone she’d seen completely shocked with it was unconscious almost instantly, unless they had some kind of defense it. The girl standing across from him didn’t seem to have a mutation, and the only outward signs of her quirk was some kind of white scarf (kind of like Aizawa-sensei’s cloth, she noted) and a metal muzzle. She looked muscular for a girl, and strong, so Mina and Sero had come to the conclusion that it was a strength buff quirk considering they hadn’t seen her _use_ it.  
   
Present Mic counted down, introduced them as Kaminari Denki and Kazeonsei Eichi, and was getting ready to start the match. Kaminari charged up in anticipation, letting out one of his one-liners and letting the air around him turn sour. Mina wasn’t close enough to feel it, but she knew his energy like the beat of her own heart.  
   
(Around her, a few things happened that escaped her notice. One, across the stadium, a boy put on muffling earphones and watched with a cheerful knowing smile. Two, Hagakure Tooru sat at the edge of her seat and watched, waited.Three, Yaoyorozu Momo pulled a set of headphones out of her midsection and set it on her girl next her with a small smile, watching intently.    
  
And four, Kazeonsei Eichi grimaced at the boy in front of her, smiling like he owned the world, and undid the thick strap that held her muffle in place.)  
   
“It appears Kazeonsei-chan is removing her support device!! I wonder what this could mean for the match, where initially it seemed one-sided!” Present Mic’s voice announced from the speakers surrounding the stadium, as Mina continued a play by play to her other boyfriend.  
   
It started out as a hum, something low and soft that still had enough sheer volume to shake the ground around her like speakers at a nightclub. Momo realized what was happening a second before some of the others did and commanded, “COVER YOUR EARS!”  
   
The girl _screamed_.  
   
Denki shot his electricity into the air, startled, but was pushed back by a wall of air. Mina couldn’t hear anything but that deafening, regulated pitch played over and over to the point she couldn’t hear herself think, couldn’t see, couldn’t function at all. Jirou looked confused and a bit relieved as her classmates curled into themselves and pressed their hands furiously to the sides of their heads.  
   
It ended, thankfully, as quickly as it began, and the girl on the stadium quickly strapped her muzzle back on sheepishly. For a second, the stadium was dead silent, though Mina was unsure whether that was because of the lingering ringing in her ears or because of the lack of noise that was there before.  
   
Hagakure lept out of her seat, gloves on and waving in the air as she screamed, “GO EI-CHAN! GO EI-CHAN!!!”  
   
The girl down in the stadium waved cheerfully at their box where Hagakure was leaning over and meandered over to where Denki was laying, incapacitated and knocked out. She carefully scooped him up, princess carry, and started toward the edge of the box.  
   
The crowd was still shockingly quiet, as crowds go. Aizawa-sensei seemed to take the lead in the announcing as Midoriya’s mumbling grew into full blown, out-loud speculation. Everyone else was just yelling.  
   
“hoLY SHIT-“  
   
“How is she in General Education, you would’ve had to completely fail the acedemic exam with a quirk like that-“  
   
“I did fail the acedemic exam and i still got in, because of the practical-“  
   
“Present Mic’s to young to have a kid that’s first year age already, what kind of freaky quirk combination lead to that?”  
   
“Why does she wear a muzzle? Is she unable to control volume or something of the sort?”  
   
“THAT’S MY GIRL, YOU GO, WHOO!! Mashimashi did you _see_ that, I’m so proud.” Hagakure yelled giddily from her spot on Ojiro’s tail. He muttered something about definitely hearing it, but he was drowned out by Class 1A’s excited chorus of-  
   
“You know her?”  
   
There was a knock at the door of the box, and the brainwashing boy from earlier peeked his head in. He looked sheepish and a little sullen at the sudden attention and attempted to just leave when he saw Ojiro staring at him, but his attempt was blocked by a tall girl with blond hair and a scarf, smiling.  
   
Mina barely caught the rapid signing on... Shinsou, was it? Shinsou’s shoulder, but she caught the drift.  
   
_Go talk to him, I’ll cover for you._  
  
As Shinsou shuffled over to where Ojiro and Aoyama were sitting, tense, Kazeonsei was tackled by Hagakure. “Eichi! I’m so proud of you, you did so well! The crowd’s a little shocked but I know they love you!”  
   
Midoriya approached her from the other side, notebook in hand. “How does your quirk work? Can you control your volume the same way Present Mic can, or is it just that volume all the time? You did so wonderfully in the battle and your quirk if harnessed correctly has a number of heroic capabilities!”  
   
Mina sighed and turned back to her phone. Classic Midoriya. It seemed best to let her get swarmed and figure out how Mina’s dumb Pichu was before her own match against Aoyama. Sound girl could wait.  
  
\--  


   
[<3 homestucks]  
\-- alienQueen[AQ] is now online –-  
AQ: hurry up! denkis already out!!  
AQ: she doesn’t stand a chance, so you’re going to want to see this.  
AT: o_ so certain of his win already? _o  
AQ: theres no transformation or mutation thats helping her with this one  
AQ: looks to me like just a basic strength enhancing quirk  
AQ: midoriyas mumbling the same thing in front of me  
AQ: plus hes charging up and she looks like she want to be anywhere else  
AQ: wait, shes taking off the muzzle  
AT: o_ what’s happening? _o  
AT: o_ OW, WHAT THE HELL IS THAT _o  
AT: o_ is present mic fucking screaming?? what the hell?? _o  
AT: o_ no, wait, there he is, hhhh _o  
AQ: SO, GOOD NEWS, WE FOUND OUT HER QUIRK  
AQ: BAD NEWS, MY EARS ARE RINGING AND DENKI LOST  
AT: o_ that’s her quirk??? _o  
AT: o_ i didn’t know present mic had a daughter, doesn’t seem old enough _o  
AQ: present mic looks as confused as we all feel  
AQ: scratch that, most of us feel  
AQ: hagakure is cheering her on?? like, a lot?  
AQ: she just fuckign scooped denki up like a bride and set him gently out of bounds  
AQ: the crowd is s h o o k  
AT: o_ fuck dude, how do you fight against that? _o  
AQ: wait she turned toward our box and gave a thumbs up  
AQ: momo gave her a thumbs up back?  
AQ: oh jirous wearing headphones, good call  
AQ: how can i dislike her if she thought of that  
AT: o_ wait, wait, hold up. _o  
AT: o_ i’m gonna assume that she can’t control volume for a second here. _o  
AT: o_ so not only does she voluntarily wear a muzzle, she thought of the effects of her quirk enough that she made sure jirou had headphones? _o  
AQ: apparently  
AQ: holy shit she’s here wait up  
AQ: let me narrate this scene like a goddamn writer.  
AQ: shes standing there at the entrance to our seats looking kind of sheepish with shinsou-san looking sullen-y next to her  
AQ: shinsou goes over to ojiro and aoyama and starts talking  
AQ: probably to apologise  
AQ: meanwhile kazeonsei-chan (?) gets fucign tackled by hagakure  
AQ: they know each other?? but didn’t know the other went to our school?  
AQ: this is something out of a goddamn,, fanfiction  
AQ: she looks appropiately bewildered and happy  
AT: o_ hold up im almost there, i wanna ask her how denki is _o  
AQ: oh shit, yeah.  
\-- alienQueen[AQ] is now idle –-  
   
\-- sunshineSurroundings [SS] began pestering neuralNeko [NN]–-  
SS: Please save me from this uncomfy question hell.  
NN: Elaborate.  
SS: First, remember that cute invisible girl who gardens with me?  
SS: She’s apparently in the hero course?  
SS: So I go up and while you’re preoccupied she fucking tackles me and we have a ‘holy shit we go to the same school moment’.  
SS: Expect some more people at our table at lunch.  
NN: Oh, fun.  
SS: And then, when I’m done being attacked and she’s comfortably attached to my side I get approached by iced-up tape man and that cute pink girl from the cavalry battle.  
SS: Who are both dating Zapados?  
NN: Wait, both of them?  
SS: Healthy poly relationship, man.  
SS: It’s on the down low, though, so don’t like, go yelling it to the world.  
NN: Got it.  
SS: So they wanted to know how he is, then Yaoyorozu-san and Jirou-san approach me and we talk for a bit and after I’ve escaped from all that with a coffee date and a plethora of numbers, as one does,  
SS: Present Mic? Is in the hallway?  
NN: _What-_  
SS: I know! And so then I talked with him for a bit and he seemed really nice and we talked a bit about my quirk and how I was doing in school and remember what they said about possibly tranferring into the hero course?  
SS: Well!  
NN: I’m sorry, you got approached personally by a famous professional hero who asked about you?  
SS: He offered to _train me._  
NN: No way.  
SS: Yes way! He also said something about Eraserhead really wanting to talk to you so watch out for him, okay? We might both have a chance at the hero course!  
NN: I’m reeling.  
SS: And now, there’s more. There’s more.  
SS: After all this I was going down to pick up my stuff and I find that kid? The ice one, with the fancy hair.  
NN: Endeavor’s kid.  
SS: Yeah, him.  
SS: So he kind of corners me in this hallway and I’m scared out of my mind because he’s super powerful and I’m this close to just decking him.  
SS: And just looks at me, all serious, and goes, “Are you Present Mic’s illegitimate child?”  
NN: krgjkfctnhrgfnmt,  
SS: I pretty much keysmash laughed in his face, yeah, and he looked insulted but he looked so serious?  
SS: Like he genuinely-ass wanted to know if I was Present Mic’s illegitimate child.  
SS: I told him no, obviously, and went on, but now I can’t see him as being aloof and serious because he just...  
NN: Okay hold on for a second, your girlfriend insisted that I sit on the 1A section because there’s weird copy guy from 1B outside.  
NN: And I started wheezing because holy shit, kid, and now Ojiro is worried about me and I want to die for multiple reasons.  
NN: Icyhot kid is looking at me weird, too.  
NN: You’ve ruined my reputation.  
NN: I hope you’re happy.  
SS: First of all, she’s not my girlfriend yet and tell her I say hi,  
NN: Dork.  
SS: And second of all, what reputation? One conversation with you and people can tell you’re just a hero-obsessed dork.  
NN: Wow, rude.  
SS: Am I wrong?  
NN: ...  
NN: Fight me.  
SS: Listen you might be stronger than you were but I’d snap you like the twinky twig you are.  
NN: Excuse me, not everyone can bench press whole people.  
SS: There's a reason I can bench-press whole people and it's called "I have a pass to the UA gym and actually use it."  
SS: Anyway, get back here!  
SS: Suszuki’s starting to trash talk you and Kobayashi and I can only defend you so much.  
NN: Okay, okay, tell her I’m coming back.  
SS: Okay! <>  
NN: <>  
\-- sunshineSurroundings [SS] ceased pestering neuralNeko [NN] –-  
   
[EXTRAS APPARENTLY, THANKS BAKUGOU]  
\-- proudTail [PT] is now online --  
PT: hagakure your girlfriend is a literal gem  
IA: SHE’S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND!  
FC: << Are you sure? She acted a lot like your girlfriend. >>  
IA: WE HANG OUT A LOT AND ARE PRETTY CLOSE! THAT’S IT!  
IA: NOW, REAL QUESTION.  
IA: HOW DO I ASK IF SHINSOU-KUN IS HER BROTHER OR NOT WITHOUT BEING WEIRD?  
PT: jdfnrcg what  
IA: YOU SAW HOW THEY ACTED TOGETHER, THEY’RE NOT LIKE, DATING.  
IA: AND THEY’RE OBVIOUSLY REALLY CLOSE.  
IA: IT’S JUST...  
PT: shes 180-ish centimeters and built like a fucking tank  
IA: YEAH, AND HE’S A PURPLE TWINK  
PT: i think biologically? probably not.  
PT: relationship-wise? maybe???  
FC: << I feel the best solution would just be to ask her. >>  
FC: << Bringing us back to the previous point of her being a wonderful person to be around! >>  
\-- armedAbomination [AA] is now online --  
AA: Why did we invite the brainwashing one to sit with us?  
IA: MONOMA-KUN WAS OUTSIDE LIKE HE WAS ON THE PROWL AND KENDOU-SAN WASN’T THERE.  
IA: I FIGURED HE SHOULD STAY WITH US FOR A BIT! HE’S KIND OF A DORK, HONESTLY.  
IA: MIDORIYA WENT ON AND ON ABOUT THE PRACTICAL HERO APPLICATIONS OF HIS QUIRK AND HE LOOKED A BIT LIKE HE WAS GOING TO DIE.  
PT: ha, yeah  
IA: OH, AND TO ANOTHER ORDER OF BUSINESS, OJIRO!! I’M KINKSHAMING ON MAIN  
PT: you should stop talking right now  
IA: DON’T THINK I MISSED THAT LITTLE WHISPER OF ‘CUTE’, MISTER!  
FC: << Oh? >>  
PT: i was- iwas talking about the invention girl!!  
IA: HMMM.  
PT: toru please  
AA: I’m not going to deny him being flustered was pretty cute, from an objective standpoint.  
IA: SEE! SHOJI AGREES!!  
PT: how does he even have eyes like that??  
PT: they’re like... purple?  
PT: how??  
FC: << Many people here have oddly colored eyes, I’ve noticed. >>  
FC: << Aside from Todoroki-kun’s heterochromia, there’s a number of people with bright red eyes, yellow eyes, green eyes, blue eyes, it’s all rather interesting. >>  
FC: << A number of them aren’t even quirk based! >>  
PT: we asking the real questions here  
IA: THIS IS KIND OF OUT OF THE BLUE, BUT IS KIRISHIMA’S HAIR NATURAL?  
IA: LIKE, IS IT ACTUALLY RED?  
PT: ive never considered it  
PT: possibly?  
PT: i mean, midoriya’s hair is actually green, and kaminari doesn’t dye that little lightning bolt, so it’s certainly an option  
AA: He’s just got... a little lighting bolt. In his hair. Naturally.  
PT: apparently!!  
IA: OH RIGHT, ASHIDO SHOWED US BABY PICTURES WHERE HE HAD THE SAME THING!  
AA: Weird.  
IA: YOU DO REALIZE YOUR HAIR LIKE, DEFIES GRAVITY, RIGHT?  
AA: That’s hair product, Hagakure-chan.  
IA: OH.  
IA: I KIND OF WISH I KNEW WHAT COLOR MY HAIR IS NOW.  
PT: im sure its absolutely awesome.  
IA: WAIT, IS INVISIBLE A COLOR?  
IA: THAT WOULD TECHNECIALLY BE CLEAR, HUH.    
PT: i guess  
PT: i wonder if there’s a quirk like aizawa sensei’s, but for physical quirks  
PT: i can’t say im not curious about what not having a tail is like  
AA: Having a normal amount of arms, even for a limited time, would be quite interesting.  
\-- avaianRevelry [AR] is now online --  
AR: () You all are giving me a crisis. ()  
AR: () Stop. ()  
AA: What do you mean?  
AR: () So, Dark Shadow is obviously sentient and his own being, correct? ()  
AR: () Every time I ask him why he’s connected me he shrugs as much as a bird shadow can. ()  
AR: () So now not only am I confused about whether Dark Shadow is supposed to be a completely separate being, but why do I have a bird head? ()  
AR: () None of my relatives have bird mutations! None of them! ()  
AR: () I am having an existential crisis about my own existence. ()  
AA: Oh dear.  
IA: GO TALK TO MIDORIYA, I BET HE ALREADY HAS AN EXPLANATION.  
IA: LISTEN, THE BOY HAS NOTEBOOKS DETAILING OUR FIGHTING SYLES, QUIRKS, WEAKNESSES, LIMITATIONS, POSSIBLE TEAM UPS; IT’S SCARY.  
IA: IF HE DIDN’T BREAK HIS OWN BONES ON A REGULAR BASIS I’D THINK HE HAD SOME KIND OF INFORMATION RETENTION QUIRK.  
PT: ok first of all what the fuck midoriya  
PT: how do you even know all of this?  
IA: HE LEFT ONE IN HIS DESK AND I GAVE IT BACK TO HIM.  
PT: just gave it back to him?  
IA: WELL OBVIOUSLY NOT, CONSIDERING HOW I KNOW WHAT’S IN IT.  
FC: << That seems like a possible security risk if a villian ever got his or her hands on that. It details weaknesses and limitations too, you say? >>  
IA: YEAH.  
IA: YOU WANT TO HEAR THE WEIRDEST PART? THE ONE I RETURNED TO HIM WAS LABELED NUMBER 14.  
PT: no fucking way  
IA: YES FUCKING WAY.  
FC: << Knowing Midoriya-kun he probably has an entry for every pro hero in the world. >>  
FC: << He might seem unassuming and cute but honestly? I’m considered the smart one and he scares me sometimes. The sheer amount and depth of analysis that he does mixed with his willingness to destroy himself is a powerful and dangerous combination. >>  
FC: << We’re lucky he wants to be a hero. >>  
PT: ...  
AA: Damn.  
IA: I AGREE WITH THAT SENTIMENT.  
IA: ANYWAY, TOKOYAMI-CHAN TOLD ME HE’S TALKING TO MIDORIYA NOW ON THE REGULAR CHAT CLIENT AND IT’S SIGNIFICANTLY CALMING HIM DOWN.  
IA: TURNS OUT OUR LOCAL BEANSPROUT BOY DID HAVE AN EXPLANATION.  
PT: that’s good at least  
PT: remind me not to get on his bad side  
IA: HAVE YOU MET HIM? YOU’D NEED TO KILL SOMEONE TO GET ON HIS BAD SIDE.  
PT: okay, good point.  
AA: YOU ALL WANT TO HEAR SOMETHING HILARIOUS?  
IA: YOU’RE STEALING MY FIRE, SHOJI.  
AA: I apologize, I’m very excited.  
PT: hit us with it, i’m intruiged  
FC: << Likewise! >>  
AA: So somewhere in the middle of this conversation I went to watch this video I like about quirk theory as a refresher, right?  
AA: And on my recommended page is this video called- give me a second, I’m getting the title.  
AA: “Rating Every Pro Hero’s Usefulness from Most to Least” by Lil’ Might  
AA: I click on it because in the course of a week it’s gotten, what, 50,000 views?  
PT: holy shit, what  
AA: And sitting there, wearing an All Might hoodie and holding personalized cards with like every single pro hero is none other than Midoriya-kun himself.  
AA: The video is an hour and a half long and ends with every pro hero I recognize and many I don’t put up in order of most to least useful with an explanation why.  
IA: CNKJFGRT OJT HE’S GOT LIKE, 40 VIDEOS THAT ARE JUST HERO-ANALYSIS BASED AND FIVE OF BAKUGOU-KUN BEATING HIM UP LABELED “KACCHAN STOP (FIRST AID TIPS AT THE END)  
PT: frkbfmz,eofr im cry ign  
PT: its,,, real  
PT: bakugou what the fuck did you do to this poor kid  
PT: oh my god in this one he’s got second degree burns and a bleeding eye  
PT: this is so funny and horrific at the same time  
FC: << No wonder he’s so scared of Bakugou-kun, my goodness. >>  
FC: << The rest of this channel is quite wonderful though! I especially like the ‘Opinions on This Year’s Class 1A.’ He’s so nice about his analysis. >>  
IA: WOAH, LOOK, HE INCLUDED SHINSOU-KUN AND TETSUTETSU-SAN AND EICHI IN HIS CLASS IA ANALYSIS!! THAT’S SO SWEET...  
PT: eichi, huh?  
IA: SHUT THE HELL UP  
AA: Hagakure just loves her girlfriend.  
IA: SHE’S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND YET!!!  
FC: << Yet. >>  
IA: YET.  
IA: MOVING ON!  
PT: lets go back to these ‘bakugou beats the living shit out of midoriya’ videos  
PT: should we report these? the newest one looks like the first year of secondary school, so they’re not,,, recent, per se  
FC: << I think ethically we should, but I don’t want Bakugou-kun to be expelled. >>  
AA: Watching these is physically painful. No wonder he has so many scars. How was Bakugou-kun allowed to use his quirk like that?  
IA: WHY DOES HE KEEP CALLING MIDORIYA “QUIRKLESS?”  
FC: << I don’t think Bakugou-kun had much discipline for his aggressive behavior before UA, hence the way he acts now. He seems to be improving, compared to these videos. >>  
FC: << The quirkless bit is the part I don’t understand. Midoriya obviously has a quirk. >>  
PT: punch things and shatter every bone in his fucking body  
FC: << ... >>  
FC: << Crudely put, yes. >>  
IA: MAYBE HE NEVER USED IT BEFORE UA? IF IT CAUSES THAT MUCH DAMAGE THEN IT WOULD MAKE SENSE HE WOULDN’T USE IT OFTEN.  
IA: MIGHT ALSO EXPLAIN HIM ACTING LIKE SOMEONE WHOSE QUIRK JUST MANIFESTED IF HE HASN’T HAD A SAFE OPPORTUNITY TO USE IT.  
FC: << That’s an incredibly smart observation of you, Hagakure! I hadn’t even considered that. >>  
FC: << Then again, he mentioned once that he and Bakugou-kun had known each other since kindergarten, explaining their nicknames. >>  
FC: << Well, I say nicknames... >>  
IA: IF IT’S AN INSULT, DOES IT COUNT AS A NICKNAME OR BULLYING?  
PT: also, isn’t kacchan just ‘katsuki-chan’  
AA: It is.  
FC: << I think that Bakugou-kun has used it as his name for so long it’s morphed from an insult to a nickname. >>  
FC: << Uraraka-chan uses it now too and I have confidence it’s not an insult to her. She said it sounds like ‘you can do it.’ >>  
AA: Aw, that’s sweet.  
   
   
   
\-- alienQueen [AQ] began pestering averagedTape [AT] –-  
AQ: sero sero sero we need to make a group chat  
AT: o_ is this because bakoubro made fun of you for not using the regular chat client? _o  
AT:o_ because I don’t object to making a group chat, but doing it because we’re petty nerds is,, petty _o  
AQ: okay first off i cant believe you still use a typing quirk  
AQ: an actual, legitimate typing quirk  
AQ: and two do you even know me everything i do is to be petty  
AQ: if petty were a competition id beat denki and thats saying something  
AT: o_ ... _o  
AT: o_ fine _o  
AT: o_ my typing quirk is awesome, thank you very much _o  
AQ: suuuure  
AQ: ill talk with kiri to get something set up since hes the only one whos gonna be able to get bakubro on  
AT: o_ good idea _o  
AQ: sweet!!  
AQ: homestuck squad, OUT  
\-- alienQueen [AQ] ceased pestering averagedTape [AT] –-  
   
\-- alienQueen [AQ] created memo [BAKUSQUAD!!] at 16:43 --  
AQ: !!! (:<  
\-- temperedExplosion [TE] changed the name to [we're not fucking calling it that] at 16:44 --  
TE: i thought we vetoed that name  
RR: You vetoed that name, we all thought it worked and call ourselves that.  
TE: did I ask for your opinion, shitty hair  
RR: Nope!  
TE: fuck off  
AT: o_ if you two are done _o  
TE: what’s with the weird ass things around your name  
AT: o_ that’s my typing quirk!! _o  
AT: o_ mina I thought you were going to help them with that too _o  
AQ: too much effort  
RR: Wait, can I have one of those too?  
AT: o_ yeah, just go into the quirk setup tab on Trollian and go wild _o  
\-- alienQueen [AQ] has added electricalCharmer [EC] to [we’re not fucking calling it that] at 16:51 --  
\-- alienQueen [AQ] has changed the name to [BAKUSQUAD] and locked naming permissions at 16:52 --  
EC: Why cant we just use the regular chat client  
AT: o_ everyone knows you’re also a homestuck, denki _o  
EC: Well yeah but pesterchum always fucks up my computer  
AT: o_ why did you download it off a sketchy ass website _o  
EC: ...  
RR: -< Dude. >-  
EC: Yo wait i didnt know kiri was a homestuck  
RR: -< I’m not, never even read it! >-  
RR: -< Ashido nearly melted the door and yelled “WE’RE SETTING UP PESTERCHUM ACCOUNTS” >-  
RR: -< I was busy convincing Bakubro not to secretly move all the stuff in her room two centimeters to the right. >-  
TE: shut the fuck up hair for brains  
RR: -< I didn’t think you were capable of that level of pettiness. >-  
AQ: neither did i tbh, im impressed  
TE: ill still do it  
RR: -< Please don’t. >-  
TE: i don’t have to listen to you shitface, i do what i want  
RR: -< ): >-  
TE: stop that I can see you pouting from here  
AQ: kiri why are you in baku’s room anyway  
AT: o_ wait WHAT _o  
RR: -< We were studying! I don’t even want to know what you were thinking. >-  
TE: i have a good enough idea mr ‘i have a bondange kink and im not fucking secretive about it’  
AT: o_ I feel attacked. _o  
TE: you should  
EC: do you mind if i join your studying  
AQ: hhh me too  
TE: whatever, get your work and get over here  
TE: dumbasses  
RR: -< Be nice, we all know we’re stupid. >-  
TE: doesn’t mean I cant remind you all  
EC: whatever, unlock  your door  
\-- electricalCharmer [EC] is idle --  
AQ: i gotta untangle myself from the pile, ill be right over  
\-- alienQueen [AQ] is idle --  
AT: o_ im going to come over too _o  
TE: what am I, a tutoring service  
AT: o_ you’re the smart one and therefore you have to explain stuff we don’t understand _o  
AT: o_ we’re not called the bakusquad for nothing _o  
\-- temperedExplosion [TE] is idle --  
RR: -< You flustered him and he punched a wall. >-  
RR: -< He’d like to say “Hurry up, [insert various tape expletives here] >-  
AT: o_ ah, a classic _o  
\-- averagedTape [AT] is idle --  
\-- rougeRiot [RR] is idle --  
   
\-- rougeRiot [RR] began pestering temperedExplosion [TE] \--  
TE: what do you want  
RR: -< Please give me back my hoodie. >-  
TE: never  
TE: it’s big and warm  
TE: why the fuck is it so big, you’re shorter than me  
RR: -< So I like big hoodies, sue me. >-  
RR: -< This is your last option for peaceful surrender or I’m coming over there and getting it myself. >-  
TE: ooh, a challenge  
TE: you’re on  
RR: -< That was not a challenge, I’m cold and I want my All Might hoodie back. >-  
RR: -< You have like eight of your own!! >-  
TE: yes  
TE: so?  
RR: -< ‘Splodeyyy >-  
RR: -< Unlock your door. >-  
TE: wait no-  
\-- rougeRiot [RR] ceased pestering temperedExplosion [TE] \--  


**\--**

Eijiro pushed himself against the door again, snapping the doorknob’s hold on the wood and dumping him into his best friend’s room. Said best friend was wearing a slightly flustered and mostly pissed expression as he flopped off of his bed exclaiming, “Kirishima, what the fuck?”  
   
The redhead darted forward against a barrage of explosions, trying to pull his sweatshirt off Bakugou. A well placed kick sent him back into the hallway as he yelled back, “Give it up, Bakubro! You have like twenty hoodies of your own, I want mine!”  
   
“You’ll have to take it off my dead body, shitty hair!”  
   
“I can arrange that.”  
   
Bakugou roared and charged forward again, (right hand extended with a popping sound, always the right hand) singeing the side of the railing Kirishima was propped against and the boy’s T-shirt. Eijiro took his brief defense drop  as an advantage and grabbed the blonde’s left arm, reaching for the jacket hood.  
   
Bakugou kicked the back of his knees, and he dropped like a domino with a handful of fabric held tight.  Eijiro braced himself, knowing exactly what was coming, and a split second later the bigger and heavier boy fell on top of him. He was quickly pushed off as Eijiro scrambled back onto his feet, noting the crowd that had started to crowd.  
   
This was now less of a scuffle and more of a spar, with both members grinning with the anticipation of a fight and a challenge with the other. This happened a lot with them, but it still gave Eijiro a rush of adreneline and something else when they fought.  
   
Bakugou took his momentary distration to be an opening and was darting forward in an instant, landing a blast on his hardened side. “That all you got, hair for brains? I’ll have to find a new sparring partner at this rate!”  
Neither of them thought that was going to happen any time soon.  
   
Eijiro was starting to stiffen up, joints aching for lack of a warm up and a section of his mind wanting a break from the intoxication that was fighting Bakugou.  
   
(Why that wording? He didn’t think about it.)  
   
Bakugou’s lunge had put him parallel to the wall, and from there it was three easy steps to get him pinned. One, grab his outstretched hand and twist it behind his back. Two, swipe at the back of his foot to get him off balance and pushed against the wall. Three, arm up, pressed against his chest. It was Kirishima’s favorite way to end a fight, because there were few ways that Bakugou could escape the arguably stronger grasp. Strength enhancing quirks and excessive exercise had their advantages.  
   
“Ha. Gotcha.”  
   
They stood there for a few second, unmoving, as Eijiro’s grin transformed from giddy and concentrated to a victorious smirk. Blasty’s twisted into a sneer then a softer, congratulatory thing that made Eijiro’s brain do loop de loops in odd directions. They were close enough that he could feel Bakugou’s quickened heartbeat in time with his own, hear the way his breath hitched. See the way his cheeked flushed.    
   
Someone, a very familiar yellow-haired zappy someone, wolf whistled. The moment was broken. “Is this what you two have been doing when you’re sparring? Sign me _up_.”  
   
Eijiro’s face flushed a red to rival his hair as he pulled away quickly, muttering nonsensibly. Bakougo took a different approach.  
   
“YOU BRAIN-FRIED OFF-BRAND PICHU REMAKE, I’LL FUCKING KILL YOU!” He screamed, and Eijiro sighed. As great a friend as Kirishima is, he’s such a fucking idiot sometimes. He reaches over to Bakugou as he starts to walk toward to the rapidly scattering crowd. Quick as a wink, Eijiro hoisted him over his shoulder.  
   
“C’mon, we’re going.”  
   
“NO, LIKE HELL WE ARE. PUT ME THE FUCK DOWN.”  
   
“Nope!”  
   
“Piece of shitty- fuck you.”  
   
“Listen, you can yell at Kaminari for being an idiot later. If you go right now there’s a chance of damaging something and Iida’s going to have your hide if we break another couch.”  
   
“You broke that couch.”  
   
“We were playing Smash together! It was a group effort.”  
   
Bakugou pouted as he was dumped onto Eijiro’s bed. “No, it was mostly you.” Eijiro was only paying half attention as he dug through the bottom of his closet, looking...  
   
“Aha! Here we go!” He murmured victoriously, pulling out a box and flopping down on the floor next to Bakugou’s feet. “Take off my hoodie, I was serious about wanting it back. That’s my only one with All Might stuff on it.”  
   
He groaned, “And I was serious about you taking it off of my dead body.”  
   
“Trade?”  
   
“I- what?”  
   
Eijiro used his hardened hand to cut the sturdy tape on the box, and pulled out an older-looking Crimson Riot hoodie. “I have a couple around the same size that I don’t wear all the time, if you want them.”  
   
He thought, lazily, that Bakugou looked... shocked, mostly, but a little touched underneath that shock. “Fine, deal,” He mumbled, shrugging off the hoodie and dropping it on Eijiro’s head, “I’ll take your dumb Crimson Riot hoodies.”  
   
“Crimson Riot is a legend, I’ll have you know.”  
Bakugou laughed, a deep and wild thing, and as they both heard Iida approch he murmured a sarcastic, “Sure, if you say so.”  
   
\--

  
\-- electricalCharmer [EC] began pestering averagedTape [AT] \--  
EC: do you know why kiri just broke down bakubro’s door while screaming  
AT: o_ no? _o  
AT: o_ what are the idiots doing this time _o  
EC: they’re... wrestling?  
EC: oh shit  
EC: baku’s wearing kiri’s sweatshirt and he wants it back  
EC: it’s an _all might hoodie_  
EC: _bakugou’s wrestling kiri in the middle of the hallway while wearing a fuckign all might hoodie_  
EC: im goign to cry this is priceless  
AT: o_ dehgkrijtnogfjdew _o  
AT: o_ i kinda wish i hadn’t taped mineta to the lockers now _o  
AT: o_ no, wait, i don’t _o  
AT: o_ he deserved it _o  
AT: o_ take pics for me _o  
AT: o_ denki? _o  
EC: oK  
EC: im back and i have pictures but i had to run for my life to get them  
EC: so, update, kirishima pinned bakubro against the wall and was all smug and shit but to everyone watching it looked like a really aggressive kabedon  
EC: and remember how im really stupid  
AT: o_ you didn’t _o  
EC: i went ‘ooooooh’ and then bolted  
EC: I think jirou was crying a little bit and the last I saw kiri just picked bakugou up and walked away  
EC: so im just gonna... hide in this closet for a bit  
AT: o_ okay first of all you’re literally the worst and im crying _o  
AT: o_ want me to get mina over there? _o  
AT: o_ im still in detention for a half hour but shes just chilling outside waiting for me _o  
EC: yes please  
EC: you’re a lifesaver sero  
AT: o_ thank me later when you show me those pictures _o  
EC: hell yeah  
\-- electricalCharmer [EC] ceased pestering averagedTape [AT] \--  
   
\-- averagedTape [AT] began pestering alienQueen [AQ] \--  
AT: o_ denki needs some help _o  
AQ: im already on it  
AQ: someone sent me pictures~  
AT: o_ no fair!! _o  
AT: o_ how are you popular, you’re a tiny pink demon _o  
AQ: you know you love my tiny pink demon-ness  
AQ: where’s he hiding now?  
AT: o_ hall closet, 3rd floor boys dorm _o  
AT: o_ for future reference that’s his go-to ‘kirishima’s not here and bakugou thinks im a prick’ hiding spot _o  
AQ: gotcha  
AQ: how are you still on your phone if you have detention?  
AT: o_ you know aizawa-sensei doesn’t care _o  
AT: o_ what I did was on par with public service _o  
AT: o_ im surprised mineta isn’t expelled by now _o  
AQ: yeah, fuck mineta  
AT: o_ FUCK MINETA!! _o  
AQ: <3!!  
AQ: kay ‘m there talk to you later  
AT: o_ <3 _o  
\-- averagedTape [AT] ceased pestering alienQueen [AQ] \--  
   
\-- defyingGravity [DG] began pestering rougeRiot [RR]  \--  
DG: o0o :)  
RR: -< Who even are you? >-  
RR: -< Ashido if you’re making another account to send me memes again I don’t want them, I can go on reddit for myself. >-  
DG: o0o It’s Uraraka, silly!  
DG: o0o I don’t think Ashido can defy gravity.  
RR: -< Oh, right, that makes sense. >-  
RR: -< What’s with the ominous smiley face? >-  
RR: -< Not very manly to make a bro worry. >-  
DG: o0o I just wanted to warn you that Iida’s coming to scold you for violent behavior in the dorms.  
DG: o0o Also, Deku has the same hoodie!! He said he’s glad someone shares his fashion sense.  
RR: -< If there’s a piece of All Might merchandise that Midoriya doesn’t have I’m going to be surprised. Have you seen his room? >-  
DG: o0o You have a point.  
DG: o0o You don’t seem that worried about Iida.  
RR: -< Oh, he’s already here. >-  
RR: -< Iida and Bakubro are arguing about what qualifies as ‘violent behavior’ >-  
RR: -< Iida thinks that mild explosions should qualify while ‘splodey’s arguing it was a friendly spar. >-  
RR: -< I did offer a diplomatic solution. >-  
DG: o0o And that was?  
RR: -< If the furniture got scorched the it was violent and if it didn’t we should be fine. >-  
RR: -< Iida was not happy with that. >-  
DG: o0o And Bakugou-kun?  
RR: -< He started laughing. >-  
RR: -< But like, good laughing! Not scary ‘I’m going to bite your face off’ laughing. >-  
DG: o0o Honestly, that seems like a good enough plan.  
RR: -< Mind coming over here and telling him? >-  
DG: o0o I’m a little preoccupied, but I’ll have Aoyama come get him.  
RR: -< Aoyama? >-  
DG: o0o He’s very persuasive.  
RR: -< Fair enough. >-  
DG: o0o Okay! He’ll be right over.  
DG: o0o See ya, Kirishima.  
RR: -< See ya, Uraraka!! >-  
\-- defyingGravity [DG] ceased pestering rougeRiot [RR]  \--  
RR: -< Wait. >-  
RR: -< When did you get pesterchum? >-  
   
\-- defyingGravity [DG] began pestering twinklingStar [TS]  \--  
DG: o0o Aoyama! I need your help.  
TS: Heureux d'aider, mon ami!  
TS: Whatever is the issue?  
DG: o0o You know how Iida gets ranty when he’s lecturing people?  
DG: o0o He’s trapped Kirishima and Bakugou in Kirishima’s room after their tussle earlier and I need you to drag him away.  
TS: Jdefkgrkefbj  
TS: I think that is a job best left for someone else.  
TS: Je ne veux pas interrompre les tourtereaux!!  
DG: o0o I’m out at the library and you’re one of the only ones who can talk sense into Iida!  
DG: o0o Don’t change the subject.  
TS: Je suis mal à l'aise avec cette idée.  
DG: o0o Obtenez votre tête de votre cul et ramasser votre béguin.  
TS: !!  
DG: o0o Translation software does exist, you know.  
TS: I hate you.  
DG: o0o Suuure.  
\-- defyingGravity [DG] ceased pestering twinklingStar [TS]  \--  
   
\-- rougeRiot [RR]  began pestering defyingGravity [DG] \--  
RR: -< I owe you one, bro. >-  
RR: -< I don’t even know what the hell just happened but Iida is out of the room and glitter is everywhere. >-  
DG: o0o Happy to help! I’d like to cash in that favor now and ask what the hell happened to prompt this in the first place.  
DG: o0o Namely, the situation that ended in Kaminari’s inciting “oooh”  
RR: -< He had my hoodie, I wanted it back, the only way to get him to stop fighting is to pin him down. Simple! >-  
DG: o0o Pin him down provocatively against a wall?  
RR: -< ndeihrncg >-  
RR: -< This is slander against my manly name because that is absolutely not what happened. >-  
DG: o0o I don’t know, multiple people have pictures.  
DG: o0o You attracted quite the crowd.  
DG: o0o It really does look like something out a manga!  
RR: -< We were sparring!! It’s perfectly normal to pin your partner down to end a match!! Nothing else! >-  
DG: o0o How did he get your hoodie anyway?  
RR: -< I was studying with the gang in his room and I left it in there. >-  
RR: -< He says he likes mine because, and I quote, ‘ashido’s are all pink, sero’s a massive asshole who only wears clothes four times his size, and i’m not the leader of the electric type gym like fucking kaminari.’ >-  
RR: -< Why he doesn’t just wear his own is a mystery. >-  
DG: o0o I have to say I’m intrigued.  
DG: o0o Deku says, and I quote, ‘The reason he doesn’t wear any of his is because they’re all All Might themed and it’s less embarrassing if it’s yours.’  
DG: o0o There are also some choice words about his fashion sense that I’m going to leave to the imagination. I personally am a fan.  
RR: -< If it’s about the skulls then yes, he has so many skulls on his clothes. So many. >-  
RR: -< Then again, literally almost everything I own is red. >-  
RR: -< I might not be in a place to judge. >-  
DG: o0o I don’t know, I own a lot of pink things! Liking a color is different than plastering everything you own with skulls.  
RR: -< Ha, yeah. >-  
RR: -< I gotta go, Bakubro’s getting suspicious about who I’m talking to and if he finds out I’m like, gossiping, he’s gonna skin me alive. >-  
DG: o0o Good luck, Kirishima!  
\-- rougeRiot [RR]  ceased pestering defyingGravity [DG] \--

\-- invisibleAttacker [IA] is now online --  
IA: YOO THE BAKUSQUAD HAS PESTERCHUM NOW  
PT: hagakure im going to need you to elaborate  
IA: I WAS TRAINING WITH ASHIDO AND SHE GOT A NOTIFICATION  
IA: AND SHE PULLS OUT HER PHONE TO CHECK IT, RIGHT?  
IA: AND THEY HAVE A GROUP MEMO CALLED ‘BAKUSQUAD’  
IA: I AM VERY EXCITED  
PT: oh, cool!  
\-- soundwaveAmplified [SA] is now online --  
SA: are we going to tell them or are we going to troll them  
AA: We’re going to troll them, obviously.  
IA: DUH  
PT: what else would we do?  
\-- fortunateCreation [FC] is now online --  
FC: << As much as I don’t condone taking advantage of our friends for our amusement, it would be hilarious if we trolled them for a while. >>  
IA: YES!! IF YAOMOMO’S ON BOARD THEN THAT’S ALL THE APPROVAL I NEED  
PT: now, with that out of the way, what happened with kirishima and bakugou yesterday? i wasn’t in the dorms and no one gave me a straight answer  
IA: THERE’S A REASON NO ONE GAVE YOU A STRAIGHT ANSWER  
PT: ha, ha, very funny, what happened  
SA: kirishima pinned bakugou against a wall and there was sexual tension so thick you could cut through it  
PT: oh worm?  
SA: worm  
SA: it was glorious  
SA: kami sent me pictures  
SA: ill show you when youre done training  
FC: << Perhaps we shouldn’t pry into our friends’ romantic lives? It seems like an overstep of boundaries. >>  
SA: cmon momo they did it in the middle of the hallway  
SA: they kind of made it our business  
FC: << ... >>  
FC: << You do have a point. >>  
PT: lets keep it on the down low, just in case  
PT: iida would get very irritated very fast if he knew and every time he lectures someone he makes me feel guilty  
IA: YEAH, YOU HAVE A POINT.  
IA: HE WOULD MAKE AN EXCELLENT PARENT TBH  
IA: REMINDS ME OF MY DAD  
AA: He even looks like a dad, with the hair and the glasses and the way he moves his hands and stuff.  
AA: Big Dad EnergyTM  
\-- twinklingStar [TS] is now online --  
TS: I would care to disagree, mon ami!  
IA: THAT’S BECAUSE YOU HAVE A BIG GAY CRUSH ON HIM  
TS: ahgebirufnjhkremj NO  
AA: It’s true, Aoyama.  
TS: I would CARE to DISAGREE!!  
AS: cmon sparkly we know its true  
AS: the only one who doesnt know is iida himself  
AS: the oblivious bastard  
FC: << Perhaps we shouldn’t pry into our friend’s romantic lives! _For real, this time._ >>  
IA: HMPH.  
TS: Je vous remercie!  
IA: WHATEVER, YOU JUST NEED TO TALK TO HIM EVENTUALLY  
IA: WE NEED A PLAN!!  
AA: Bakusquad trolling plan, activate!  
AS: (since when did we start calling them the bakusquad)  
PT: (Since they started calling themselves that, just go with it.)  
IA: WHO’S GOING TO TAKE WHO  
AS: i call zapados  
TS: S'il vous plait, he’s more of a Mareep.  
AS: fight me frenchy hes a zapados  
IA: I ALWAYS SAW HIM AS A RAICHU  
FC: << Ignoring what type of electric pokemon we all think Kaminari-chan should be, I think I’ll take Sero. >>  
PT: oh, good plan. it’ll take someone smarter to bamboozle him  
PT: i have a feeling just based on my handle they’d figure me out pretty quickly  
IA: I CALL KIRISHIMA!!  
AA: I can do Ashido.  
PT: okay, who’s going to be able to do bakugou??  
FC: << Hmm... >>  
\-- quietConversation [QC] is now online --  
QC: ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)  
IA: KOUDA, YOU’D BE PERFECT!!  
IA: OMINOUS ENOUGH ONLINE THAT HE’D BE CONFUSED AND INNOCENT ENOUGH THAT HE WOULDN’T SUSPECT A THING!!!  
FC: << I have to admit, that’s ingenious. Bakougo-kun is very hard to fool. >>  
PT: thats everyone i guess  
PT: tokoyami, i know you’re ghosting the chat. help me run damage control?  
\-- avianRevelry [AR] is now online --  
AR: () Fine, but only because this is going to be ridiculous. ()  
AR: () I enjoy a challenge. ()  
QC: (ᵔᴥᵔ)  
PT: then we’re set! hell yeah.  
FC: << When should we start? >>  
PT: whenever you feel like it i guess.  
PT: i know for a fact hagakure is making an alternate account and starting right now.  
IA: FIGHT ME OJIRO  
PT: but am i wrong  
IA: NO, BUT I DIDN’T NEED TO BE EXPOSED LIKE THIS  
AS: hey im doing the same thing dont call us out  
\-- proudTail [PT] changed the name to [temporary trolling team] at 13:14 -- IA: ALLITERATION!!  
FC: << We should all get started on our homework before we begin this endeavor. >>  
PT: thats true  
IA: YAOMOMO, CAN YOU HELP WITH MIC’S ENGLISH HOMEWORK? THERE’S A WORD I DON’T KNOW AND THERE’S NO ONLINE TRANSLATION.  
FC: << Oh dear, I was having the same issue. >>  
AS: yo just go ask kami hes really good with english  
PT: really?  
AS: yeah  
AS: i have no idea why  
IA: ISN’T HE OBSESSED WITH WEIRD AMERICAN CARTOONS?  
AS: how have i never made that connection  
QC: ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯  
PT: whatever, im going to lock this chat so we can get stuff done. go talk on the class homework chat if you have questions.  


\-- proudTail [PT] has locked [temporary trolling team] at 13:30 for the reason of [go do your homework, fools] at 13:23 --


	2. Sleepover Schenanigans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sleepover time!! Who doesn't love thirty excitable kids eating junk food and embarrassing each other?
> 
> (Otherwise known as I had a lot of fun this week, writing)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ashido – alienQueen   
> Sero – averagedTape  
> Kirishima – rougeRiot  
> Bakugou – temperedExplosion  
> Kaminari – electricalCharmer  
> Iida – existentialEngine  
> Todoroki – icyHot  
> Yaomomo – fortunateCreation  
> Hagakure – invisibleAttacker  
> Ojiro – proudTail  
> Kazeonsei – sunshineSurroundings  
> Shinsou – neuralNeko  
> Monoma – kazooChild  
> Tetsutetsu – steelSteel  
> Kendou – sisterlyHandling  
> Ibara – apolisticVein  
> Awase – bondingApathy  
> Eraserhead – begrudginglyErased  
> Present Mic – deafeningOptimism  
> Midnight – provacativeSlumber  
> Vlad King – irritatedAdoptive

\-- invisibleAttacker [IA] began pestering proudTail [PT] –  
IA: I WANT TO ORGANIZE A MOVIE NIGHT  
PT: okay??  
IA: I WAS ASKING FOR YOUR HELP IN PLANNING AND ORGANIZING SAID MOVIE NIGHT IN A COVERT WAY.  
PT: maybe say that next time, i am the Big Stupid  
PT: so, like, who are we talking? class 1A?  
IA: CLASS 1A, ANYONE FROM 1B WHO WANTS TO JOIN OTHER THAN MAYBE MONOMA. I WAS GOING TO INVITE SHINSOU AND EICHI TOO, SINCE THEY’VE BEEN TRAINING A LOT LATELY AND LOOK PRETTY TIRED.  
PT: dhebgfy maybe not shinsou?? please?  
IA: HE’S GOING TO BE IN THE HERO COURSE SOON WHETHER WE LIKE IT OR NOT. HAVE YOU SEEN THE WAY HE AND AIZAWA-SENSEI ARE TALKING NOW?   
IA: I KNOW IT’S STILL AWKWARD SINCE THE SPORTS FESTIVAL AND ALL, BUT IT WOULD BE GREAT IF YOU COULD AT LEAST BE FRIENDS!  
PT: i know i know that’s all reasonable  
PT: he just,,, i dunno, he’s really sweet and all sometimes but he’s got todoroki energy  
PT: y’know, unbelievably powerful and he knows it but he’s so calm, all the time  
PT: freaks me out  
IA: YOU JUST NEED TO HANG OUT WITH HIM MORE. A COUPLE OF DAYS BACK HE WAS HELPING EI-CHAN AND ME WITH THEIR GARDEN AND HE DISAPPEARED FOR A BIT AND WE FOUND HIM IN THE BACK, PURRING AND FEEDING A STRAY CAT.  
IA: LIKE TODOROKI, HE SEEMS REALLY INTIMIDATING UNTIL YOU HIT THAT FIRST LAYER AND HE’S JUST PURE DORK UNDERNEATH.  
PT: wow, don’t expose him like this.  
PT: anyway, fine, ill help you set it up. monoma should be fine if kendou comes too, and ive heard he’s a legend at super smash brothers.  
PT: did you ever find out if they’re siblings?  
PT: kazeonsei and shinsou  
IA: THEY APPARENTLY LIVE AT THE SAME GROUP HOME, AND HAVE SINCE BEFORE THEY STARTED GOING TO UA.  
IA: SO OFFICIALLY? NAH. EI-CHAN CALLS HIM “TOSHI-NII”, THOUGH, SO UNTIL TOLD OTHERWISE ASSUME THEY’RE LIKE SIBLINGS.  
IA: IF WE’RE GOING TO HAVE A MOVIE NIGHT WE NEED PLANS FOR UHH  
IA: FOOD, WHETHER OR NOT WE’RE ALLOWED TO HAVE A SLEEPOVER SITUATION, GAMES AND STUFF, ACTUALLY GETTING PERMISSION AND ASKING PEOPLE.  
IA: I’M GOING TO MAKE A MEMO TO PLAN THIS, HOLD ON.  
PT: kay, add me when you’re done.  
\-- invisibleAttacker [IA] ceased pestering proudTail [PT] --

  
\-- invisibleAttacker [IA] created memo [PLANNING] at 15:47 –-  
\-- invisibleAttacker [IA] added temperedExplosion [TE] and fortunateCreator [FC] and proudTail [PT] to [PLANNING] --  
IA: LETS GET THIS BREAD, GAMERS.  
FC: << ? >>  
PT: hagakure wants to plan a class 1a and b sleepover/movie night/game night to relax before internships, cause after the sports festival and usj we’re all a little high-strung  
FC: << Oh! That sounds like a lovely idea! >>  
FC: << What did you need me to do? >>  
IA: I NEED HELP TALKING TO ADMINISTRATION AND GETTING PERMISSION FOR THIS WHOLE DEBACLE, AND YOU’RE GOOD AT TALKING IN WAYS MOST OF US LACK.  
TE: what i want to know is one, why the fuck am i here, and two, how did you get my handle  
FC: << Bakugou? >>  
TE: mhm.  
IA: I MADE A CALCULATED GUESS. ANYWAY! I NEED YOU TO TAKE THE BAKUSQUAD AND GO FIND OUT IF CLASS 1B WANTS TO DO THIS OR NOT. IF NOT, IT CAN JUST BE A COOL CLASS BONDING ACTIVITY.  
TE: why me??? have you met me??  
PT: we’ll need someone to y’know, stop monoma. he’s gotten pretty weird lately   
TE: oh, wait, right  
TE: fine, ill do your shitty errands for you.  
TE: do you all have a plan for like, food and stuff?  
TE: kirishima and knockoff class B kirishima can and will eat you out of house and home if you’re not ready for them  
TE: hungry rock assholes.  
FC: << I hadn’t considered that. Hagakure? >>  
IA: I WAS GOING TO TALK TO AIZAWA-SENSEI AND MIC-SENSEI ABOUT GOING ON A GROCERY RUN! SATOU ALREADY OFFERED TO HELP MAKE SOME STUFF, AND WE COULD HAVE THAT AMERICAN FINGER FOOD THAT KAMINARI HOARDS LIKE IT’S GOLD.  
TE: ew, that gross shit? absolutely not  
TE: it’s fucking disgusting  
TE: if im the one going grocery shopping i can make something. satou isn’t unbearable to be around like most of you extras  
IA: RUDE!  
TE: oh, bite me  
PT: im going to ignore that and mark food as handled.  
PT: that leaves,, games!  
PT: kirishima has a shit ton of video games by the console downstairs, and i can ask uraraka if we can use her board games  
IA: WE COULD ALSO DO TRADITIONAL SLEEPOVER GAMES!!  
PT: holy shit, yes, that would be hilarious  
FC: << Traditional sleepover games? >>  
IA: YEAH! HAVEN’T YOU BEEN TO A SLEEPOVER BEFORE?  
FC: << I stayed over at Iida-kun’s and Todoroki-kun’s houses sometimes when we were little, but we didn’t do much more than read books and debate. >>  
PT: have you ever heard of truth or dare  
FC: << Somewhat? I’ve heard people talk of it but I’ve never played myself. >>  
IA: OH, YOU’LL LOVE IT! SLEEPOVER GAMES ARE LIKE... NEVER HAVE I EVER, TRUTH OR DARE, THE POCKY GAME, THINGS LIKE THAT! THEY’RE JUST TALKING GAMES.  
FC: << Oh, that sounds fun. >>  
FC: << That seem settled then. Is there anything else we might need to cover? >>  
PT: ...  
PT: m*neta  
IA: LOCK HIM IN HIS ROOM, DONE!  
PT: he’ll find a way to sneak out if he thinks he can be gross  
PT: he’s inventive in his awfulness  
FC: << Maybe we can distract him in the evening? >>  
PT: what if we set up a wild goose chase  
FC: << What kind are you suggesting? >>  
PT: the kind that ends with him trapped in a training area overnight  
IA: I HAVE A MORE ETHICAL OPTION.  
IA: WELL, I SAY MORE ETHICAL.  
IA: YAOMOMO, HOW MANY COUNTS OF HARASSMENT HAVE YOU SENT IN TO THE TEACHERS?  
FC: << Personally? >>  
FC: << Four. >>  
PT: what the fuck!  
FC: << Once he broke into my room and stole some of my things. >>  
IA: OKAY, SO IF WE ADD THAT TO MY TWO, TSUYU’S THREE, AND THE REST OF THE GIRL’S ONE OR TWO CASES THAT MAKES ENOUGH TO SERIOUSLY TESTIFY AGAINST HIM.  
IA: HOW ABOUT WE HANG THAT OVER HIS HEAD IN CASE HE TRIES TO DO SOMETHING?  
PT: how about we fucking report him and get him kicked out of the school  
FC: << We’ve tried. >>  
FC: << The board of directors seems to think that it’s a ‘boys will be boys’ scenario. >>  
FC: << The teachers and principal Nedzu are beyond pissed off at his actions, but can’t expel him unless he does something else, something worse. >>  
TE: that’s such fucking bullshit  
TE: mineta had been nothing but a trashy pervert from day one and he doesn’t deserve to go to UA, much less be in the hero course  
TE: id much rather have tired-looking brainwashing kid over grape any fucking day  
PT: that’s most of us, tbh  
PT: FUCK MINETA  
TE: FUCK MINETA  
IA: FUCK MINETA!!!  
FC: << ... >>  
FC: << Fuck Mineta!! >>  
IA: HELL YEAH.  
IA: KAY, THAT SEEMS TO BE IT.  
IA: BAKUGOU, GO ROUND UP YOUR SQUAD AND GET CRACKING.  
IA: I’M GOING TO GET TOKOYAMI AND JIROU TO THREATEN MINETA, SINCE THEY’RE SCARY.  
FC: << Go ask Todoroki-kun as well. He’s quite intimidating up close, and wouldn’t hesitate to help out. >>  
IA: OH, GOOD PLAN!!  
PT: kay, im going to go round up the rest of 1A  
\-- proudTail [PT] is idle –  
  
[BAKUSQUAD]  
\-- temperedExplosion [TE] is now online –-  
TE: first of all, pichu, fuck you  
\-- electricalCharmer [EC] is now online --  
EC: i deserve that  
TE: second of all, theres going to be a sleepover/movie night/whatever the fuck invisibabble is doing tonight and you all are coming with me to do stuff  
\-- rougeRiot [RR] is now online --  
KK: -< Do we have a choice? >-  
TE: no  
KK: -< Fun. >-  
\-- alienQueen [AQ] is now online --  
AQ: wait, so what are we doing exactly?  
AQ: we had plans  
\-- averagedTape [AT] is now online --  
AT: o_ those plans were to sit in my room and eat hot pockets, mina, they can be subject to change if we’re having a class sleepover _o  
AQ: ugh, fine  
TE: ignoring you, the plan is we go convince some people from class 1B to join us while i restrain monoma and then we get groceries because if i eat any more junk food im going to vomit  
KK: -< Yes!! Bakugou cooking! >-  
AQ: anything for bakubro cooking  
AQ: those were literally the best eggs ive ever had in my life  
TE: whatever, just get outside, this has to happen now  
KK: -< I’ll be out in a second! >-  
\-- rougeRiot [RR] is now idle –  
TE: the rest of you better be out soon, i’m leaving for the 1B dorms in five  
\-- temperedExplosion [TE] is now idle  


[Class 1A S U C KS]  
\-- steelSteel [SS] is online –  
SS: Can we change the name of the chat? Class 1A isn’t that bad!!  
\-- sisterlyHandling [SH] is now online --  
SH: *someone* refuses to let it be changed back, and since they locked naming permissions we can’t fix it  
\-- kazooChild [KC] is now online –  
KC: CLASS 1A IS UNDESERVING OF THE ATTENTION THEY RECEIVE, JUST BECAUSE THEY WERE ATTACKED BY VILLIANS  
KC: OUR CLASSES ARE ON THE SAME LEVEL! WE’RE JUST AS COMPETENT AS THEM.  
SH: no one’s denying that!! we’re just saying, maybe you should be a little nicer  
KC: NEVER  
SS: Why kazoo child?  
SH: oh, have you seen that american meme where the small child plays the kazoo?  
SS: Oh, yes, I have.  
SH: https://i.imgur.com/ixjCk3I.jpg  
SH: look me in the eye and tell me this isn’t monoma  
SS: ...  
SS: I can’t.  
KC: WE LOOK NOTHING ALIKE  
SH: keep telling yourself that, bud  
SH: someone want to tell me why class 1A tetsutetsu is outside  
SS: Kirishima! We weren’t supposed to spar today, I don’t think.  
KC: ILL GO TELL THEM TO LEAVE.  
SH: no you won’t you’ll creep them out and teach pony new swear words  
KC: SLANDER  
SS: I’ll talk to them!! Again, I’m only mostly sure Kiri and I weren’t supposed to spar today.  
KC: TOO LATE, ALREADY OUTSIDE  
SH: ill get em tetsu  
SS: Thanks, they kinda freak me out when they get like this.  
SH: they’re just passionate!! not exactly passionate about.. a good thing, but passionate nonetheless.  
SH: okay, got them  
SH: YOO CLASS 1A’S THROWING A SLEEPOVER PARTY AND WANTS TO INVITE EVRYONE  
SS: No way-  
SH: yes way i am hells excited  
SH: get a chance to know our fellow hero hopefuls and have a good time??  
SH: im going  
SS: I’ll go too, then! Is Monoma invited?  
SH: flkhjner grbe nr yes, yes they are  
SH: i don’t know,,, why,  
SS: Maybe 1A wants to give them a chance!  
SH: some of those girls are so sweet, damn, i wouldn’t deny it  
SH: blasty-splode-and-a-dollop-of-anger-issues out here is surrounded by sweet, memey idiots and i love them  
SH: adopted? hell yea  
SS: You’re like the big sister of this disfunctional hero family, huh.  
SH: yes  
SH: yes i am.  
SH: okay uhh, pony and awase want to come, can u ask ibara  
SS: On it!  
SS: She says she’s up for it but she’d rather sleep back here.  
SH: okay valid, everyone else is either studying or training or something  
SH: smh they all need a sleepover-esque break  
SH: class 1A tetsu told me to tell you you’re still on for thurs and we should head over around 5 for games and food and stuff  
SH: apparently they’re all still stressed out of their minds and need a break  
SS: First of all he does have a name, and second of all sweet!!  
SH: is that you hanging out of the window  
SS: Yes, I’m waving goodbye like a good bro.  
SH: you’re like the personality of a goddamn ray of sunshine squeezed into a sweaty jock and it’s the weirdest thing  
SH: anyway it’s like 4 now, so pack some clothes for later and finish up what you’re doing  
SS: Got it! I’ll meet you downstairs in a half-an-hour.  
\-- steelSteel [SS] is now offline –  
  
\-- invisibleAttacker [IA] began pestering sunshineSurroundings [SS] –-  
IA: :)  
SS: Tooru!! What’s going on?  
IA: WE’RE HAVING A SLEEPOVER/GAME NIGHT/TIME-TO-STOP-LITERALLY-STRESSING-OURSELVES-OUT-OF-OUR-MINDS TIME  
IA: YOU AND SHINSOU ARE INVITED BECAUSE DON’T HIDE IT, I KNOW YOU’RE TIRED WITH ALL OF YOUR SUPER-SECRET NOT-HERO TRAINING  
SS: hhh  
SS: You got me, damn.  
SS: I’d love to come! Your classmates are all so nice,,  
SS: I’ll ask Toshi-nii and he’s going to say no but he’ll be there, don’t worry.  
SS: Now, what are you planning?  
IA: GAMES AND FOOD AND STUFF-  
SS: No like, I know you and you are a sneaky person with good-hearted ulterior motives.  
SS: What are you planning?  
IA: HEHEHEH  
SS: Never a good sign..  
IA: HOW MANY SLEEPOVER GAMES HAVE YOU PLAYED?  
SS: Oh, so this is a shippy mission.  
IA: YES, DELICATELY PUT.  
IA: FROM WHAT I’VE GOTTEN THERE’S ONE CONFIRMED CRUSH, TWO POSSIBLE ONES THAT ARE MOSTLY SECURE, AND TWO THAT ARE A SOLID-ASS MAYBE.  
IA: MOST ARE RAINBOW-SOAKED, UNSURPRISINGLY.  
SS: Ooh, fun!! If you need help let me know, okay?  
IA: WILL DO!  
IA: I HAVE OUR RESIDENT “WOW, YOU CAN COOK?” FRIEND OUT GROCERY SHOPPING AND THREE OF HIS ONLY FRIENDS HAPPEN TO BE THE ONLY ONES IN A CONFIRMED RELATIONSHIP.  
IA: WHO ELSE BETTER TO RECRUIT TO GET POCKY AND GENTLY SHOVE THE OTHER TWO INTO A CORNER OR SOMETHING, JESUS CHRIST.  
SS: Wow are they that obvious?  
IA: I’D GIVE YOU PICTURES BUT I WAS FORCED TO DELETE THEM.  
IA: THE LIVING PERSONIFICATION OF GERMAN SPARKLE PARTY IS A LOT MORE PERSUASIVE THAN I GAVE HIM CREDIT FOR.  
SS: I- never mind.  
SS: I’m sure I’ll see it when I get to see the rest of your friends in a non-tournament related environment. They can’t be any worse than my classmates.  
IA: THE PINING OR THE FACT THAT THEY’RE ABUSIVE DIPSHITS?  
SS: Both.  
IA: ONCE YOU’RE OUT OF THERE I’M GOING TO SNEAK INTO THE DORMS AND FILL THEIR BEDS WITH MICE.  
SS: Please don’t, there are a few nice ones.  
IA: HMPH, FINE.  
IA: I CANNOT BELIEVE THERE’S A POSSIBILITY WE’LL BE IN THE SAME CLASS!!  
IA: IT WOULD BE SO COOL AND YOU’D GET TO MOVE INTO OUR DORM AND THERE’S AN OPEN ROOM NEXT TO MINE~  
SS: Hehehehe  
SS: Noice.  
IA: ANYWAY, I HAVE TO FINISH SETTING UP, BUT I’LL SEE YOU THERE!!!  
IA: <3  
SS: <3  
\-- invisibleAttacker [IA] ceased pestering sunshineSurroundings [SS] –  
  
\-- sunshineSurroundings [SS] began pestering neuralNeko [NN] –-  
NN: If this is about the sleepover thing then you know the answer.  
SS: “I kind of want to go but also want to seem cool and aloof so I’m going to let you drag me bodily over there and have fun” ?  
NN: Wow, rude.  
NN: It’s spot on, and I hate you for it, but rude.  
SS: Why can’t you just... enjoy things.  
NN: Because I need to seem cool and aloof.  
SS: You call yourself a umbreon but you’re actually secretly a vaporeon, I don’t make the rules.  
NN: You can never truly bury the pokemon inside of you, huh.  
SS: Oh, fight me.  
SS: I like pokemon.  
SS: Y’know what? I’ll shout it to the world!  
SS: POKEMON ARE FUCKING LIT AND Y’ALL CAN FIGHT ME, SUCK IT THOTS.  
NN: fhjkewfgbrkeign i heard you, how loud did you turn that thing up??  
SS: That was a comfortable 5.  
NN: You killed Aizawa-sensei, he’s sighing and mumbling something about parallels.  
NN: AIZAWA SENSEI’S M A R R I ED-  
SS: No _way-_  
NN: YES WAY HE JUST KIND OF MUMBLED, ‘WHY DID I MARRY HIM, THE IDIOT-‘ AND FROZE AND TURNED TO ME ALL SERIOUS-LIKE AND WENT, ‘YOU CAN’T REPEAT THAT TO ANYONE OR MY DUMB KIDS WILL HAVE A BETTING POOL WITHIN THE MONTH’ IM CRY IGN  
SS: You do realize you just told me, right?  
NN: ^ yes, he does now ^  
SS: Hello Eraserhead! I just heard the funniest bit of information!  
NN: ^ come pick him up, he’s done for the day ^  
NN: ^ i don’t even want to know which one of you this is. aoyama? kaminari? ^  
SS: Nope! I don’t think you know me.  
SS: Anyway, it’s a pleasure to talk to you, I’ll be there in a moment.  
\-- sunshineSurroundings [SS] ceased pestering neuralNeko [NN] –-  
  
\-- begrudginglyErased [BE] began pestering neuralNeko [NN] –-  
BE: ^ tell your yellow friend to delete that log and not tell anyone ^  
NN: I don’t even need to tell her, she won’t.  
NN: I trust her with my life, you can trust her with your h u s ba nd  
BE: ^ i regret every moment of my existance ^  
NN: 1A already has a betting pool by the way, they were all just trying to figure out whether you were in a relationship at all and some were trying to figure out who.  
NN: I can’t say I’m not curious.  
BE: ^ how would you even know what my awful little shit children were up to? ^  
NN: I have an informant.  
BE: ^ is it kaminari? there’s no way it’s not kaminari ^  
NN: Surprisingly, no, but I can’t say anything more.  
BE: ^ ... ^  
BE: ^ send me the link to the betting pool, i want to try something. ^  
NN: Ialmostfeelbadforthemthere’slike90000yenonthis.ath  
BE: ^ wow, you weren’t kidding ^  
NN: Ashido is efficient at what she does, I won’t lie.  
BE: ^ i’ll have to recruit her to do paperwork with me at some point. this is organized beautifully ^  
BE: ^ now, go, that sleepover thing is tonight. ^  
\-- begrudginglyErased [BE] ceased pestering neuralNeko [NN] –-

\-- 

When Hitoshi showed up at six the party was almost in full swing, as much as a large collection of teenagers playing board games and yelling could be called a party. In the corner, Midoriya was playing a board game with his gang while Todoroki pointed to different sections of the board, to the frustration of the other players. In the other corner, Tetsutetsu was icing cupcakes with a boy Hitoshi didn’t recognize and one with a rock faced mutation. 

The real attention, however was in the middle of the room, where Eichi’s girlfriend was fucking _decimating_ everyone at Mario Kart.

“HOW,” the blond sitting next to her yelled in frustration, as she lapped him yet again and hit the back of his bike with a green shell, “ARE YOU SO GOOD AT THIS GAME?”

“You just suck, Denki.”

“Did I _ask_ for your opinion, Mina.”

“She’s right, y’know.” Hitoshi murmured, leaning over the back of the couch near Kaminari’s head. Zapados (and he was a Zapados no matter how much he acted like a fucking Mareep sometimes) was one of the easiest to get along with and his optimism was contagious to the permanently tired hero student.

“I cannot believe you’d betray me like this to my own demons, Shinsou, I feel abandoned.”

“You should. Hagakure, where’s your girlfriend, she owes me like forty yen.” 

“She was off showing pictures of her cat to the vine girl last time I saw her,” Hagakure offered distractedly, winning the race and flopping further into the couch with a sigh. Her usual outfit was replaced with a tanktop and a pair of gym shorts. “Check Monopoly, she probs wandered over there. We’re playing sleepover games when I’m done with this tournament. The last person i have to fight is who, Tsuyu?”

“Kero, yes.”

“You’re going down, froppy froggo.”

“Hmm, we’ll see.”

 

Hitoshi took a second to figure out what the hell Monopoly was, and when he did recognize the board game he’d also located his honorary little sister flopped over the brown-haired girl’s shoulder. She seemed to be offering encouragement. It was hard to tell with her mouth not hidden by a muzzle, but by a device that looked a bit like a gas mask.

The pink haired support student, who used her chance to the best of her abilities and gained Shinsou’s admiration, offered to make Kazeonsei a muffler for her quirk almost as soon as she was whisked off the stage. He remembered the bubbly voice like it was yesterday, as she excitedly explained that she wanted to see if she could make a way for his best friend in the entire world a way to talk.

He remembered the way she cried on his shoulder on their tiny cramped bed in the home, not out of fear but out of sheer joy.

He remembered when he first heard her voice, high and sweet like sugar water on a day where you could melt to the pavement.

As he walked over and sat next to her, leaning tiredly into her side, he could hear that same chipper voice providing encouragement to Midoriya, who was losing about as badly as someone could, holy shit. “How did you even get that many hotels onto one square, wow.”

Todoroki shrugged fluidly, nabbing what he was owed from the smaller boy’s pile. “Yaoyorozu is the real genius here. I’m just the player.”

“Todoroki, Yaomomo’s a different player.”

“I’m copying her strategies.”

“Todoroki-kun, I bought everything I landed on because I’m tired and don’t care.”

The teen blinked slowly, (like a cat, Hitoshi mused, and he felt Eichi do the same next to him) and he looked back at the board like his entire worldview had been shattered. Midoriya just leaned into his red side and muttered at the board as if that would give his money back. “I am not going to lose this if I have to rob the bank and resort to a life of villainy to do it.”

“Hey, buddy, how about we don’t.”

“Listen, I’m tired and Todoroki is warm and if I have to steal the fake money in the fake bank of this weird board game to stay here then I will.”

As if to thwart Midoriya’s dream of staying curled against the other’s side, Hagakure and Ashido stood on the table and banged two pots together, silencing the room effectively. “Everybody get in a circle!! We’re going to be playing some basic sleepover games while Bakugou is finishing up the food, and then we’ll get started on the movies.”

The large array of pillows, blankets, and stuffed animals were pushed up against the walls of the common room along with the couches, and the students formed a circle on the edges of the open area. Hagakure ended up next to Eichi, who was next to Hitoshi himself, who was tucked under a blanket with the one and only Ojiro Mashirao. Hitoshi sort of wanted to vanish out of existence. The other seemed to share the sentiment to an extent, and the only thing keeping them together was lack of space and the alternative of sitting next to Monoma. He... didn’t want to sit next to Monoma.

A quick glance around the room showed that it was mostly 1A students, although he did recognize some 1B; Hitoshi and Eichi were the only ones not in the hero course, and he felt a little excluded from their struggle. Not that he had much time to, because the game started as soon as everyone settled down.

Ashido dragged Sero and Kaminari to the center of the circle and fished boxes out of their pockets.

“The first game we’re going to play is... the pocky game! I’m sure you’re all familiar with it.”

 _What_ -

She continued on, oblivious to the sheer ‘aw hell no’ that swept through him. “If you’re not, the game works like this. Both people hold one end of the pocky in their mouth. If you let go of the pocky or the other gets to the middle first, you lose! And if you end up kissing,” She grinned impishy, “it’s a tie. The exceptions are that Kazeonsei-chan and Tokoyami aren’t playing on merit of not being able to hold the pocky, and if Bakugou comes back and ends up getting paired with Midoriya we’re spinning again.”

Tokoyami across the circle and Midoriya signed in relief, while Eichi looked a little disappointed. Hitoshi knew that she got the intention behind it.

Hitoshi felt the yellow blanket around him shift as Ojiro quietly raised his hand.

“Yes, Ojiro!”

“How will the pairs be decided?”

He felt his chest do its little, familiar thrum.

“Spin the bottle, my good friend, spin the bottle.”

“Oh, so it’s... it’s random.”

“Yes, don’t sound so relieved! It’s not even going to be that bad,” She announced reassuringly, and dragged her boys back to their pillow cuddle pile. Yaoyorozu-san pulled a bottle out of her midsection and tossed it at Mina, who caught it effortlessly. “In a show of faith, I’m going first.”

She sent the bottle off with a push, letting it wobble its way into lazy circles until it landed on Todoroki. He looked confused with this advancement. “What do I do now?”

Hitoshi had to hold back a laugh as she pulled a pocky out the box and explained the rules again. Midoriya was laughing into Todoroki’s shoulder, and the round was over as soon as it began when Todoroki let go in the face of Ashido’s enthusiasm.

This time it was Todoroki’s turn to spin. His went significantly faster than Ashido’s did, and landed on the large cupcake boy from earlier that Hitoshi still didn’t recognize. His quirk had something to do with sugar, right?

Yeah, that round was over pretty fast too.

The game continued in the same sort of way. The rock faced boy whose name was Kouda played with Ojiro, which was a little weird for Hitoshi to share a blanket with. It didn’t help that said blanket-pal immediately buried his face into Hitoshi’s hair after the fact and he had to concentrate on not immediately dying at the soft mumble of embarrassment Ojiro let out. 

Todoroki was one of the bottle’s favorites, he noticed. After Ashido he also got paired with tape-elbows Sero, and as he started to warm up to the game he also got a bit more competitive. Midoriya was taking the opportunity to, as promised, stay buried in the warmer boy’s side and study how everyone used their quirks. Todoroki won his round with Sero by shocking him with cold and making him let go.

Monoma was paired up with the other boy from class 1B, the fusion one, and the latter won easily with some kind of taunting flirt that left Monoma stuttering and red. This became the method of distraction for the next few pairs.

Ojiro and Kaminari, (Ojiro had to remove his head from Hitoshi’s hair, and he can’t say he wasn’t a little disappointed) Tsuyu and Iida, (That one ended in an awkward kiss and a tie) Kirishima and Tsuyu again, the game went on. Hitoshi felt himself nodding off onto the shoulder next to him and was only jolted back to attention by a sharp poke on his arm. “Toshi-nii!”

“Mm?”

“Your turn!!”

Hitoshi looked up to see Aoyama, grinning sheepishly and holding out a pocky. “My apologies, mon ami!”

Hitoshi reached out, broke it in half, and threw one at Aoyama’s face while taking a bite of the other. “Not doing this.”

Ashido groaned, “C’mon! Just because you’re tired and bitter doesn’t mean you’re exempt. Here, spin the bottle again, and you gotta do it with whoever it lands on!!”

“Well, fuck, whatever.” he mumbled, leaning out and spinning the bottle that had been pointed in his direction. Sometime in-between Ojiro and Kaminari and dozing off the former’s tail had wrapped protectively around his side, and even after he spun the bottle he made no move to push it off. Training rigorously with Eraserhead must have left him more tired than he thought.

Not tired enough, though, to miss the bottle twisting, slowing, and landing on Ojiro as the room let up into whispers.

_Fuck._

\--

[BAKUSQUAD]  
\-- alienQueen [AQ] is now online –-  
AQ: bakubroooo get out here  
AQ: the foods not going to be done for like half an hour and i know you’re just in there browsing... fuckign, pinterest on your phone  
\-- temperedExplosion [TE] is now online --  
TE: fuck off and fuck you  
AQ: wow, rude, cme out here and have fun  
AQ: kiri’s got a spot open next to him  
\-- rougeRiot [RR] is now online –-  
KK: -< Yeah, c’mon bro! >-  
KK: -< There’s also a spot next to Yaomomo but she’s trying to flirt with Jirou and it’s not... going well. >-  
TE: why the fuck not, they’re both gay and pining  
KK: -< Yes, but Yaomomo can’t flirt. >-  
TE: okay, point  
KK: -< Get out here, I have a blanket and you need to be social. >-  
TE: no the fuck i don’t  
AQ: >:(  
AQ: ill recruit kiri to drag you out  
AQ: i know he can  
TE: frlhtkbgtgfr  
KK: -< I’ll do it!! >:P >-  
TE: im coming, fucker  
TE: put me in between a rock and a hard place  
AQ: of which kiri is both  
KK: -< Oh my god, I am, pfft >-  
TE: bite me shitty hair, im coming  
TE: who’s doing it now?  
KK: -< Ojiro and Shinsou, but they’re stalling because they don’t want to admit they’re gay for each other. >-  
TE: oh fun  
TE: tell eight arms fuckhands mc mike to move over  
AQ: fbgrkj ngncr fukc hand mc mike  
KK: -< You broke Ashido. >-  
KK: -< She’s like, struggling to breathe. >-  
KK: -< God now Kami and Sero are doing it too, look what you’ve done. >-  
TE: fuck yo is yaomomo reading it?  
KK: -< She’s readign it out lo ud im sobbign >-  
TE: move over im killing someone  
KK: -< No, no you’re not, get under the blanket you nerd. >-  
TE: you’re the nerd  
KK: -< I’m not the one that’s tired because I usually go to bed at 8:30. >-  
TE: you don’t get to make fun of the reason i don’t have acne and do well in class, idiot  
KK: -< I thought the anti-acne thing was like, a part of your quirk. >-  
KK: -< Doesn’t your mom have a moisturizing quirk or something? >-  
TE: asdfergjktkn DAMN IT  
TE: fuck that, fuck you, move over  
\-- temperedExplosion [TE] is idle –-  
  
\--

Mashirao immediately felt his face flush and brushed away the traitorous look that Hagakure was giving him, even without a face. How she managed it was beyond him. 

Fortunately for him and the stupid weird flutters that reminded him of an asthma attack, Shinsou also looked a bit affronted. Or, more accurately, was trying to look affronted and looked more like an angry kitten being accosted by its siblings. Mashirao felt almost bad that he was apparently dragged here; he really did look ten seconds away from passing out. 

Ashido broke his muffled speculation when her somewhat concealed giggles broke in to full out, tear-inducing laughter across the circle. One glance at the phone in her hand and Sero and Kaminari joined in, and everyone seemed baffled until she choked out between laughs, “FUCKHANDS MCMIKE-“ 

“Wait, who’s fuckhands mcmike,” Midoriya asked as half the crowd started laughing from just the words, “and who are you texting?” 

Bakugou opened the door to the kitchen with a soured expression and pushed Shoji out of the way of its path. “IT’S NOT FUNNY, ASHIDO, I ASKED YOU TO DO SOMETHING AND YOU FUCKING MOCK ME.” 

The room was dead silent, for a single second. 

Mashirao felt relieved as Shinsou muffled laughter into his shoulder, and he was positive he heard a whispered, ‘fuckhands mcmike...’ 

Then everyone was laughing again, harder than before, and Bakugou looked like he was going to start exploding things. Kirishima sighed in between giggles and dragged him down underneath a blanket to calm down while the class got out their energy. Eventually (and it was a long eventually) everyone settled down again, and Kazeonsei nudged his shoulder. 

“Yo, Ojiro, it’s still your and Toshi-nii’s turn.” 

“Hey, Kazeonsei, what the fuck.” 

“As his sibling it’s my duty to be unbelievingly irritating at every possible moment.” 

Ashido threw the box at Mashirao’s head with a demon-like cackle and exclaimed, “You gotta do it, fool! We all had to.” 

He sighed and pulled one out of the box, feeling like he was surrounded by hungry teenage lions and wishing he didn’t. “I’d like to apologize in advance, Shinsou.” 

Shinsou grumbled and sat himself up, yawning, “Whatever, let’s just get this over with.” 

Mashirao took one end of the pocky like he did the past two times, and it only occurred to him now that it wasn’t very long. Shinsou’s face was only a few centimeters away from his, with his mouth turned in a sleepy, challenging smile. Ashido began counting down. 

\--    
  
[aizawa adopted all of 1A and refuses to admit it]  
\-- begrudinglyErased [BE] is now online! –-  
BE: ^ the kids have multiple betting pools on who of us are dating who ^  
\-- irritatedAdoptive [IA] is now online! --  
IA: Are you just figuring this out?  
BE: ^ you knew? ^  
IA: Of course, my kids couldn’t hide a secret to save their lives with Monoma and Poni in the classroom.  
BE: ^ well you’ve met ashido, she’s a sneaky one. ^  
BE: ^ none of them are willing to sell out their classmates, and it would be valuable if it wasn’t so annoying ^  
\-- deafeningOptimism [DO] is now online! –-  
DO: HOW DID YOU FIND OUT?  
BE: ^ shinsou sent me the link when i asked ^  
IA: He’s not even in the class!  
BE: ^ he’s got an... informant, from what he told me ^  
BE: ^ it’s either ojiro or kaminari. i’m positive ^  
DO: WELL, KAZEONSEI IS DATING HAGAKURE, SO IT MIGHT BE HER.  
\-- provacativeSlumber [PS] is now online! –-  
PS: d fbgjgfjrnvf excuse me what  
PS: why was i not informed of this  
BE: ^ i would have assumed you’d at least tell me! ^  
PS: wait, zashi didn’t even tell shouta?  
DO: I THOUGHT YOU ALL KNEW?  
DO: THEY’RE NOT SUBTLE ABOUT IT.  
IA: In Eraser’s defense, one of them blends in quite well and the other is invisible.  
IA: Literally.  
PS: okay fine you have a point there  
PS: still i am the current Romance ExpertTM and i feel like i should have been informed.  
BE: ^ how are you the romance expert if we’re the ones that are married ^  
PS: because you two are a gay disaster and i was the one that got you together in the first place  
DO: SHE HAS A POINT, SHOUTA  
BE: ^ fight me ^  
PS: *stares at the camera like im in the office*  
BE: ^ you too, square up ^  
PS: nah, supervising this disaster of a sleepover from afar is more fun  
BE: ^ which reminds me, how are they getting along? ^  
BE: ^ all of my problem children, some of vlad’s, and the loud one in one room, a lot can go wrong ^  
IA: Already including Shinsou in your problem children, huh.  
BE: ^ as far as i’m concerned, he is ^  
PS: anyway, they’re playing the pocky game  
BE: ^ oh my god ^  
PS: what did u expect shouta it’s a sleepover and your explosion one is still cooking  
PS: he’s doing a pretty good job too, wow  
PS: i’d eat that  
DO: NEMURI, YOU’D EAT ANYTHING  
PS: true  
PS: they’re all uninjured and look like they’re either a bit embarrassed or having fun  
PS: either way i stand by this thing being a good idea  
BE: ^ hagakure and yaoyorozu might be a bit overwhelming at times, but they’re not stupid ^  
BE: ^ they’re all stressed about the upcoming internships. a little time to relax is a good thing for 1A and B alike ^  
BE: ^ i just hope they get some sleep at all ^  
PS: looks like your little protégé is already getting some  
PS: mic’s totally-not-his-actual-child looks nearly there too  
PS: what have you two been doing to those kids, damn  
BE: ^ training them ^  
DO: TRAINING THEM!!  
DO: SHE’S A FAST LEARNER AND WORKS VERY HARD, BUT SHE HAS A TENDENCY TO WORK HERSELF INTO THE GROUND.  
DO: REMINDS ME OF A CERTAIN SOMEONE I KNOW!  
BE: ^ we’re heroes, it’s our job to keep the peace ^  
DO: WHEN THE LAST TIME YOU SLEPT WITHOUT ME FORCIBLY DRAGGING YOU TO BED OR IN YOUR SLEEPING BAG SOMEWHERE IN THE HALLWAY?  
BE: ^ i don’t know and don’t particularly care ^  
BE: ^ now your student? different story ^  
BE: ^ have you talked to her parents about it ^  
DO: HER LEGAL GUARDIAN SAYS THAT IT’S NOT A BIG DEAL, SO I TRY TO MONITOR IT MORE AT SCHOOL.  
DO: THEY DON’T GET DORMS OUT OF THE HERO COURSE, APPARENTLY.  
BE: ^ they’re not as much under threat ^  
BE: ^ training to build support armour and how to market superheroes is different than the danger of trying to become one ^  
IA: Those two should be an exception.  
PS: ??  
PS: vlad?  
IA: The children were targeted, and we held the sports festival anyway. It most likely didn’t escape their notice that two powerful non-hero students made it up there.  
IA: Shinsou especially they’d want their hands on. His quirk to an uneducated outsider can seem like a quirk better used for villiany.  
BE: ^ just as a warning, don’t say stuff like that where he can hear it ^  
BE: ^ he’s heard too much of it ^  
DO: NO DOUBT. VILLIAN QUIRKS AND HERO QUIRKS ARE WORDS THAT ARE SAID... A LOT, AT UA. ESPECIALLY AMONG THE GENERAL EDUCATION STUDENTS.  
DO: I’VE TALKED TO HOUND DOG ABOUT IT, AND WE’RE WORKING ON PERHAPS MAKING A CAMPAIGN AGAINST THEM. DISCOURAGE THAT TYPE OF THINKING BEFORE IT STARTS TO CHANGE INTO SOMETHING MORE DANGEROUS.  
DO: OF ALL THE PEOPLE WE UNDERSTAND BEST THAT WORDS HAVE A LOT OF POWER.  
PS: that’s... uncharacteristically serious of you, zashi  
BE: ^ it’s a serious topic ^  
BE: ^ don’t tell me no one’s ever told you that your quirk is more suited for a villian than a hero ^  
PS: all the time. then again, i had plenty of people telling me otherwise  
IA: I happen to be in the same boat. Blood Manipulation isn’t exactly seen as a heroic quirk.  
DO: MINE WAS LESS HECKLING AND MORE...  
PS: assholes who hated you for being strong and smart at the same time  
DO: HH, IT COULD BE DESCRIBED THAT WAY. LOTS OF AVOIDANCE AND A FAIR AMOUNT OF GETTING BEAT UP IN ALLEYS.  
DO: GOT MUZZLED A COUPLE TIMES, TOO. THAT WAS FUN.  
BE: ^ pretending that’s all in the past won’t help you or anyone, zashi. ^  
DO: I KNOW I KNOW KITTEN, LETS JUST MOVE ON.  
DO: HOW’S THE PARTY GOING?  
PS: oh they’re still playing the game  
PS: hold up im getting closer, mina is cracking up and she’s dragging her boyfriends into it  
PS: there’s... something on her phone?  
PS: fbrkubgfurmdlji oh my go d  
BE: ^ what did she do- ^  
PS: f uck han ds mcmike  
PS: someone sent her a text calling shoji fuckhands mcmike  
DO: WLMRCUtgTU,H.GBVT,,  
BE: ^ he’s crying ^  
IA: I am too, wow.  
IA: I have an idea whose language is that creative.  
PS: your guess would be correct  
PS: he just got dragged under a blanket by kirishima, screaming bloody murder  
PS: im staying because i want to see who the pairing is when they calm down  
BE: ^ pocky... pairing? ^  
BE: ^ don’t tell me you ship students too ^  
PS: ew, no  
PS: listen some of them get along like a house on fire and some of them want to tear each other apart  
PS: it’s a safety precaution  
PS: you really ought to do something about that, by the way  
PS: oh my god, it’s shinsou and ojiro  
BE: ^ frjngrucg _what_ ^  
PS: the pair is shinsou and ojiro  
IA: That seems like a poor plan.  
PS: well actually  
PS: hold on  
PS: lookatthemthisisjustamassivecuddlepile.jpeg  
BE: ^ ... ^  
DO: WOW, APPROPRIATE FILENAME.  
DO: GLAD TO SEE THE CLASSES ARE HAVING FUN AND GETTING ALONG!  
IA: I’m glad to see them being friendly as well. I allowed Monoma to go because Kendou can help keep his more competetive impulses in check, but it looks as if he’s genuinely enjoying himelf.  
\-- begrudgingErased [BE] is now idle! –-  
DO: HE’S YELLING BECAUSE THEY ALL LOOK SO HAPPY AND HE’S PROUD OF THEM.  
PS: ha, nerd

\--

Tooru leaned over Eichi and whispered, “Are they just going to sit there awkwardly or will they need a nudge?”

Eichi chuckled, a light and lilting sound that was music to Tooru’s ears. “Oh, maybe a little push in the right direction wouldn’t be a _bad_ thing.”

Ashido was counting down from ten like she had been, so that they would start at the same time. Tooru knew, from a logical and best-friendly standpoint, that even Mashi’s sad, gay ass would want to win and had won the past two times he got spun on. She also knew based off the red flush on his face that only showed up for this round that he was going to be _so_ embarrassed.

She heard Shinsou murmur something under his breath, soft enough that she couldn’t make out the words but weird and flirty enough to make Mashi even more flustered.  
“3, 2, 1!”

They stayed where they were for a fraction of a second before Eichi reached over Tooru and pushed her brother forward in Mashi’s lap. He let out a startled yelp, like an angry cat, they both fell over onto Monoma next to them.

“Hey, watch it!”

Ashido and Tooru were doubled over laughing at the furiously embarrassed look that Shinsou gave Eichi. “You were taking too long, Toshi-nii.”

“Hey, fuck you too.”

Mashi pushed himself back up and hid his face under the blanket that was wrapped around him and Shinsou. “Can we play something else now because if I have to play another round of this game I’m running off and becoming a hermit.”

“Mashimashi, c’mon!!”

“No, I’m done. What are other sleepover games?”

Yaoyorozu raised her hand tentatively. “Didn’t you mention something about truth or dare? I happen to at least know the rules to that one.”

“Also, the food’s not going to be done for another 15 minutes and we need to pass the time somehow,” Bakugou scoffed from his spot in the Bakusquad pile.

“Okay,” Ashido conceded sadly, “We’ll do truth or dare now. Kazonsei-chan, mind turning that thing up a little bit and waking some of our sleepy pals up?”

Eichi complied, turning her support device up to a 3 and exclaiming, “Wake up, everyone! We’re starting another game!”

Half the group jolted up at the sudden noise. Midoriya was so out of it that when he heard it he accidentally floundered around, smacking Todoroki in the face and letting out a startled yelp. Bakugou (who was by then firmly asleep) sparked small explosions at his fingertips and burned Kirishima’s T-shirt. “What the fuck, noise face?”

“I was following orders dude.”

“Tch, whatever.”

Ashido clapped her hands to command the attention in the room and grinned brightly. “I’ll go first and if you need an explanation after the first round, just flag me down. Even Todoroki, aka i’m-not-here-to-make-friends-and-i’ll-surpass-you-all-but-i’m-actually-just-a-memey-nerd-san should be able to understand this one.”

Todoroki looked affronted, but Midoriya and Uraraka on each side of him giggled and he calmed down. “Rude.”

Ashido turned on Kaminari, who looked thoroughly indignant at being woken up. “Denki! Truth or Dare?”

“Uh, I dunno, dare?”

“I dare you to... let Hanta completely wrap you up.”

He shrugged as Sero perked up, grinning, and began wrapping Kaminari in tape. “Oh, this is going to be priceless.”

“Whatever, dork. My turn, right?”

“Yup!”

“Uh... before I do, anyone here have some kind of animal mutation.”

Eichi sheepishly raised her hand. She was the only one, despite Tokoyami having a completely visible bird head. “Um. Sort of?”

“’Kay, Kouda! Truth or dare.”

It went about as expected. As it turned out, Eichi couldn’t actually speak shark but could understand shark and the whole conversation was pretty weird. They went around the circle, asking and daring and causing Yaomomo and Iida to step up and do their class rep job in the event of anyone getting hurt. Overall, though, Tooru was having a lot of fun even when she got covered in flour.

Kirishima, the next one up, cracked his knuckles and turned toward the 1B students. “Tetsu! Truth or dare?”

“Hmm. Dare! It’s more manly.”

“Hhh, what’s a good... oh! Dude, put your hair down.”

“What? No.”

“What if I did too?”

“Hmm. That’s fair.”

Tetsutetsu ruffled up his hair, with Awase helping, and soon it hung down curly around his shoulders and in front of his eyes. Kirishima over by Bakugou did the same, his coming down just below his shoulders and flopping straight into his face. Everyone in the room just sat there for a second.

Jirou, looking bewildered, broke the silence with a whispered, “What the _fuck_ -“

“Why are you all looking at me like I just sprouted a second head?”

“Um, because how the hell did you just, muss up your hair a bit and get it to be 8 inches longer?

Kirishima shrugged. “Hair product does its wonders. Besides, I wanted to look cool!”

Amid the resulting firestorm of hair-related questions and exasperated answers, Tooru relaxed into her girlfriend and subtly pointed at Bakugou. “Look, I think he just realized how gay he is.”

Bakugou was sitting beside and a little behind Kirishima, shielding him from a troupe of excited teens. This was fortunate for Bakugou, as spots of color dotted his cheeks and star-struck expression. It was as if he was literally smacked with something. Tooru was guessing, based off personal experience and the way he was braiding Kirishima’s hair that it was probably some kind of realization. Or confusion. Feelings were difficult, and she wasn’t about to assume stuff.

“Oh my god, you’re right. My question is how does he know how to braid hair better than I can, considering I’m the one with braid-length hair?”

“He’s an ass most of the time, but to hell if he isn’t one of the smartest and most powerful kids in the class. He won the sports festival,  he’s third academically, he carefully designed his hero costume to account for his weaknesses and strengths, he can cook?”

“Wow, holy shit.”

Kirishima and Yaoyorozu managed to get everyone else to calm down eventually, although not without the added casualty of Aoyama fussing with Tetsutetsu’s hair and putting it up into an elaborate updo.

“Okay, it’s... Midoriya’s turn!”

Midoriya sat up with an evil glint in his eye and turned toward Bakugou. “Kacchan, truth or dare?”

“Dare, fucking idiot.”

“Go get your glasses, I saw you squinting at the TV earlier and you’re going to give yourself a headache.”

Bakugou went a bit rigid, and muttered into his hand as Kirishima and Sero turned toward him quizzically. Kaminari asked, “You wear glasses?”

“Fuck off.”

“C’mon, join the glasses gang Bakubro,” He taunted, gesturing to his own square glasses. It had been a while since Tooru had seen them, since he usually only wore the form of them with his hero costume. Aoyama and Iida’s attention was caught as well, though only momentarily.

Bakugou scoffed, but pushed himself up and toward the dorms. “I’m getting them, but I want no part in your dumbass glasses squad and it’s only for a dare.”

“Aw, no fair.”

Tooru settled down into Eichi’s shoulder and dozed off as Tokoyami asked his question and the game went on.

\--

This was a special kind of torture, Shouto figured.

The first game was awkward enough, but he lacked a filter to the point that he honestly just didn’t care. It was the second game that was really getting on his nerves. It almost made him regret giving in to Midoriya’s teasing and assurances that it would be a good idea. Key word being almost.

Aoyama cracked his knuckles and turned toward Shouto, grin stretching evilly from his spot at Iida’s side. “Tokoroki-kun, mon ami, truth or dare?”

“Dare.”

“I dare you to get a cookie from your forehead to your mouth without touching it or using your quirk!”

He shrugged, relieved that it seemed easy, and caught the layer cookie that Aoyama threw at him. Everyone seemed to like this one, in comparison to the outrage that erupted when Kaminari dared Sero to jump off the balcony and Iida threw a fit.

(He was fine. He was quite good with his quirk, Shouto noted.)

He put the cookie on his forehead and started to move his face around to get it into his mouth. Unfortunately, a childhood of hiding every emotion meant he wasn’t exactly... expressive, in his facial features. Uraraka and Midoriya next to him were laughing so hard at failed attempt after failed attempt that they had started to cry, shining like two idiotic, endearing stars.

“I would like to say for the record that this dare seems stupid, Aoyama.”

“That’s the point! Mon ami, you haven’t had a chance to embarrass yourself like the rest of us, so I thought I’d give you one!”

Iida chuckled, patting Aoyama’s back and saying, “That’s very thoughtful of you!”

“Well of course!”

Shouto lifted his hands in victory as he finally ate the cookie, reveling in his friends’ cheering. Going around the circle, the next person was...

“Hello, ladies,” Mineta droned, leaning against the wall and smirking. He looked about as vile as he usually did, just in shorts and a T-shirt instead of a uniform. “It’s my turn, isn’t it?”

Hagakure stood up and glared in his general direction, as far as Shouto could guess. Anger seeped into her words as she spat out, “I thought we told you to stay in your room, _brat_.”

“Hmm, I decided not to.”

Iida grimaced at his proximity to Mineta, but raised his hand authoritatively. “Even if none of us wish to have him here, he is a part of 1A. He should be allowed to play with some restrictions.”

A groan went around the room, mostly from the girls, and Kazeonsei coaxed Hagakure to sit down while glaring daggers straight at Mineta. This only seemed to fuel his excitement in the game, and when everyone settled down he looked right at her. “Kazeonsei, was it? Truth or dare?”

She steeled up. “Dare.”

“Take your shirt and scarf off.”

Iida took the opportunity to smack him upside the head. Shouto saw Kazeonsei flinch and reach out to Shinsou at her side, who looked equally as concerned. Everyone else looked varying levels of interested and irritated. She mumbled, “Do I have to?”

“According to the rules of the game, yes. I’m sorry that he put you in a position. As expected of the class-“

“Horny grape bitch.”

“I was going to say pervert, but that works as well.”

“Pfft. Kay, fine. Fuck you Mineta, and I’m leaving my binder on.”

Shouto sent a glare Mineta’s way as he drooled in anticipation, and Kazeonsei shrugged off her sweater and scarf combination with a binder underneath.

Unfortunately, that wasn’t what caught people’s attention. What commanded the gaze in the room was a massive pinkish-brown burn scar, stretching from the right side of her neck and down her left arm and side. It looked almost as old as Shouto’s and he subconsciously reached toward the right side of his face before stopping himself. The rest of her was covered in various bruises and scars that looked more like the ones one got from knives, and a large gash across her right shoulder looked like it came from a whip.

She shuffled uncomfortably in the silence, holding onto her brother’s hand, and exclaimed, “Iida! It’s your turn!”

“O- oh, right. Um. Yaoyorozu-chan!”

The conversation moved on, although Mineta looked less horny and a little more scared. It was easy to see how strong she looked without the bulk of the sweater and scarf hiding it, so Shouto assumed that he was at least a little intimidated.

Midoriya mumbled, “What happened to her?”

“I don’t think it’s our place to ask.”

“I think there are very few quirks that could cause that scar, and it looks controlled enough that it probably wasn’t an accident.”

“...”

“I don’t think it was him, but it’s a possibility.”

“If he did that I wouldn’t know about it.”

Shouto felt his side heating up, in anger and frustration. Midoriya noticed, and nudged Shouto’s shoulder comfortingly. “Hey, whatever. I doubt burning trashman himself would hurt an innocent civilian, so I must be wrong.”.  
   
He relaxed back into Shouto’s side. “Besides, food’s going to be done soon and then I can finally get you to watch The Little Mermaid.”

“That American movie you keep mentioning?”

“Yeah, I think you’ll like it.”

Shouto hummed into Midoriya’s hair as Yaoyorozu tried to make a replica of the Mona Lisa. “Maybe.”

\--

[do we really need a name for this we’ve known each other like, forever]  
\-- extisentialEngine [EE] is now online! –-  
EE: (( I CAN’T BELIEVE I AGREE WITH THE IDEA TO LOCK SOMEONE IN THEIR ROOM, BUT MINETA REALLY IS A SPECIAL CASE ))  
\-- fortunateCreation [FC] is now online! --  
FC: << He’s quite the horrible specimen of humanity. >>  
\-- icyHot [IH] is now online! --  
IH: [[ well no shit, momo ]]  
FC: << I was stating the obvious. >>  
EE: (( IN OTHER NEWS, BAKUGOU-KUN IS LETTING THE FOOD COOL AND THEN WE’LL BE ABLE TO START WITH MOVIES! ))  
FC: << Oh, fun! >>  
FC: << What did you two submit on the spreadsheet? >>  
EE: (( I PERSONALLY PUT IN KIKI’S DELIVERY SERVICE AND HOWL’S MOVING CASTLE. ))  
IH: [[ you always have been a sucker for ghibli, damn ]]  
IH: [[ midoriya put in some american princess movie for me ]]  
IH: [[ said i’d like it ]]  
FC: << I put in an American movie as well. Their superhero movies are always quite compelling. >>  
FC: << My favorite is the quirkless technology hero! >>  
IH: [[ iron man ]]  
IH: [[ you went with i r o n  m a n ]]  
FC: << Fight me behind the McDonalds at 3 am, Shouto, it’s a good movie. >>  
EE: (( WE ACCEPT OTHER PEOPLE’S TERRIBLE MOVIE CHOICES IN THIS HOUSEHOLD, SHOUTO. ))  
FC: << Wow, betrayed my own countrymen. >>  
FC: << Tenya, you’ve abandoned me. >>  
EE: (( MOMO, AS MUCH AS I’D LIKE TO COME TO YOUR DEFENSE WE’VE WATCHED THE SAME MOVIE EIGHTY THOUSAND TIMES AND IT’S STILL... SUCH A TERRIBLE MOVIE. ))  
FC: << You unironically like the Flash show. >>  
IH: [[ tenya i am disappointed in you ]]  
EE: (( IT’S NOT EVERYDAY YOU SEE SOMEONE WITH A SPEED QUIRK LIKE HIS! ))  
IH: [[ says the person whose entire family has speed quirks like him ]]  
EE: (( OH, FIGHT ME.))  
FC: << He’s right, you know. >>  
EE: (( ENGINE IS A DIFFERENT QUIRK THAN ENHANCED SPEED! ))  
FC: << Same speedy spoody effect. >>  
IH: [[ i never thought id hear you say the words speedy spoody ]]  
IH: [[ never cease to disappoint ]]  
EE: (( AOYAMA IS ONLY REFERRING ME AS SPEEDY SPOODY NOW. ))  
EE: (( LOOK WHAT YOU’VE DONE ))  
IH: [[ kfvrgungfxbrm he i s ]]  
FC: << Keysmashed like a true gay. >>  
IH: [[ excuse u, keysmashed like a tru asexual ]]  
FC: << Same effect. >>  
FC: << Besides, you’re currently cuddled with Midoriya-kun so you have no right to talk. >>  
IH: [[ it is not cuddling he likes my warm side and im tired ]]  
EE: (( HMM, I DON’T KNOW? ))  
EE: (( LOOKS A LIL GAY TO ME ))  
IH: [[ tenya here betraying us both ]]  
IH: [[ betrayee betrayer ]]  
FC: << Betrayee Betrayer. >>  
EE: (( WOW, RUDE. ))  
EE: (( I ONLY SPEAK THE TRUTH. ))  
FC: << \- _- >>  
IH: [[ oh snap momo pulled out the skeptical face you dead ]]  
FC: << If we’re going to talk about gayness... >>  
EE: (( PLEASE CEASE WITH THIS TRAIN OF THOUGHT. ))  
FC: << You and Aoyama have been very close lately! And also, every time you say something affirming he starts blushing and Uraraka keeps giving him the ‘talk to your crush’ look. >>  
FC: << And don’t think I missed his cape in your room. >>  
IH: [[ excuse me wh at ]]  
EE: (( HE WAS GETTING A NEW ONE AND I LIKE THE COLOR! NOTHING ELSE! ))  
IH: [[ ;) ]]  
EE: (( YOU PUT THAT WINKY FACE BACK WHERE IT CAME FROM OR I’LL CONFISCATE IT. ))  
IH: [[ ;( ]]  
FC: << Aw, look, now you’ve made him sad. >>  
FC: << Tenya, Tsuyu’s been trying to get your attention for the past five minutes and you’re too busy being a flustered square to notice. >>  
EE: (( OH! ))  
EE: (( IT’S TIME TO EAT, SO WRAP UP WHAT YOU’RE DOING AND HEAD TO THE KITCHEN. ))  
\-- exsititentialEngine [EE] is now offline! –-

\--

Katsuki watched his best friend devour the plate of nachos like it was his last meal. It wouldn’t be, obviously, unless Katsuki decided to kill him, but the pride his friends took in his cooking made his heart swell, just a little bit.

Or, that might’ve been whatever he feels toward Kirishima. It’s a weird and confusing feeling.

It rings as positive, mostly, a mixture of pride and admiration, the feeling of being an equal with the feeling of being the best, being someone’s #1.

It’s also sweaty palms and barely-remembered mornings, an aesthetic asschafing mixture of a heart attack and a blood rush that sets his head spinning when Kirishima smiles softly at something small he did, or leans over the right way when he’s stretching, or slams Katsuki against a wall to end a spar and their faces are close enough to touch.

... yeah, no, he’s so fucking whipped.

Ashido leans over and pokes Katsuki’s arm, whispering, “You’re staring.”

“Shut the fuck up you pathetic excuse for a starburst sweatstain,” he offers back, flipping her off and tearing his eyes away from Kirishima’s messy braid. “Or I’ll take what little fucks I give and shove them down your throat.”

Kirishima giggled, “Ooh, kinky.”

The surprised choking from Kaminari barely hid Sero’s laughter or Ashido’s muttering of, “You don’t get to talk, Kiri.”

“Kirishima, I will literally strangle you with my bare hands.”

“Sure.”

“Meet me behind the McDonald’s after everyone falls asleep, I’ll kick your ass.”

“Oh, I don’t doubt it, but then Aizawa-sensei would kick your ass for sneaking out and I would be having the time of my life.”

Katsuki threw a chip at Kirishima’s face, pouting, and the glittering laughter that came in his direction almost lifted him off the ground.

Damn, he was starting to sound like fucking... Deku. Eugh.

“Shut the fuck up, shitty hair!! No one wants your gross laughing!”

This only served to make Kirishima laugh harder, and that prompted Katsuki to reach over and pull the boy into a headlock, mussing up his hair. Kirishima struggled against the hold, yelping, “Hey, watch it!”

“I told you to stop laughing!”

“Yeah, but you’re making that little pouting face like a sad cat and I couldn’t help it!”

“What was that, idiot? I can’t hear you over the color of your fucking hair!!”

“Low blow, Bakubro, low blow.”

Kirishima flopped down into Katsuki’s lap dramatically, mourning his honor, and Katsuki had to stifle a laugh as he fixed places where strands of Kirishima’s hair had come out of its hold. “Idiot.”

“Okay, someone please tell me I’m not hallucinating,” Sero muttered.

Ashido grinned evilly from her spot on Sero’s lap. “Nope. Bakugou, you didn’t tell us you were a big softy! Very cute.”

“I’m not _cute_ you pathetic asschafing shit-tainted fuck!!”

Kaminari was laugh-crying on Sero’s other side. “I’m crying that is like, Karkat level swearing! Bakugou is Karkat confirmed!”

“Your opinion is parked squarely in the nobody gives a fuck zone, Pichu.”

“Excuse you, I’m at least a Pikachu.”

“Pichu is smaller, still has the trademarked lightning bolt, and has the added pokedex entry of being unable to control his charge. Sounds like you to me.”

Kirishima giggled _again_ , poking Bakugou’s face. “I didn’t know you were a Pokemon nerd.”

“As much as I loathe to admit it, isn’t everyone a Pokemon nerd at some point in their life?”

Jirou flopped over Kaminari’s shoulders, grinning. “Absolutely, the same way everyone either goes through an emo phase or a hero phase. Sometimes both.”

“Problem is, our hero phase ended in us getting into the hero course and training to become heroes, so it never really ended.”

“Point.”

Hagakure clapped her hands loudly at the front of the room, quieting it down. “We’re going to start with movies! So, the ones voted for the most were... Kiki’s delivery service, The Little Mermaid, and Agengers: Infinity War. We’re going to start with Avengers: Infinity War because it’s the longest and the hardest to fall asleep watching.”

Katsuki figured that was solid logic. The entire Ashido-proclaimed ‘Bakusquad’ (God, he hated that nickname) piled onto a set of beanbags to the left of the screen with popcorn, and Katsuki once again found himself with Kirishima’s head comfortably rested on his lap and surrounded by warmth and pillows. And honestly? He was starting to drift off. Based on his usual schedule, he should’ve fallen asleep an hour and a half ago.

He felt a poke on his cheek and looked down to see Kirishima, smiling softly in a way that twisted at his gut. “Hey, Bakubro, stop muttering to yourself, the movie’s starting.”

“Oh. Okay.”

“Damn, you look tired. This is staying up late for you, right?”

“Mhm.”

“Well, then make sure you sleep in tomorrow instead of waking up at six to do whatever the hell you do.”

“Whatever, hair for brains.”

Kirishima chuckled as they settled in the opening music, letting the sounds of the movie lull Katsuki to sleep.

\--

[<3 homestucks]  
\-- averagedTape [AT] is online –-  
AT: o_ lookatthemimcrying.jpeg _o  
AT: o_ who knew bakugou could look so soft _o  
\-- electricalCharmer [EC] is now online --  
EC: they’re so cute??  
\-- alienQueen [AQ] is now online --  
AQ: this isn’t legal  
AQ: like, honestly  
AQ: there’s been so much gay fuckery tonight  
EC: tru that, man  
EC: now, are we adding ojiro and shinsou to the betting pool or nah  
AQ: of course, who do you take me for  
AT: o_ speaking of the betting pool, do either of you know who neko.neko is? _o  
AT: o_ they showed up a few days ago and put some bets on aizawa-sensei and mic-sensei _o  
EC: uh. No?  
EC: we haven’t put out many invites lately  
EC: could be one of the 1B kids after theirs crashed and burned, they’ve got weird nicknames  
AQ: that’s probably it  
AQ: while im updating it, jirou and yaomomo?  
AT: o_ do it, they’re being really cute and blushy rn _o  
AT: o_ oh shit jirou’s braiding yaomomo’s hair, while they chat, that’s adorable. _o  
AT: o_ even if they’re not a thing that’s just.. friend goals _o  
EC: braiding the other’s hair is either friend goals or inherently gay  
AQ: true that  
AQ: im disappointed kazeonsei-chan and hagakure got together before we could set something up  
AQ: could’ve made a pretty penny  
AT: o_ damn, you’re right _o  
AT: o_ kay im like,, 20 seconds from crashing, so sorry in advance bout pins and needles denki _o  
EC: it’s okay, just sleep  
\-- averagedTape [AT] is now idle –-  
  
\-- kazooChild [KC] changed the name to [Class 1A makes really good nachos] –-  
\-- kazooChild [KC] has added apolisticVein [AV] and littlePony [LP] and bondingApathy [BA] to [Class 1A makes really good nachos] –-  
\-- sisterlyHandling [SH] is now online --  
SH: wow, monoma had a change of heart  
KC: I STILL WANT TO BEAT THEM, BUT THEY’RE NOT... BAD. PLUS, THEY’RE STUCK WITH THAT CREEPY PURPLE ONE.  
AV: ~ Indeed. I don’t understand why someone of his... impurity is allowed in the heroics course. ~  
BA: Someone wanna explain to me what’s going on?  
SH: welcome to the sadness meme-o, awase!!  
LP: > meme-o <  
SH: meme-o  
AV: ~ meme-o ~  
\-- steelSteel [SS] is now online --  
SS: Meme-o  
KC: MEME-O  
BA: Meme-o  
SH: the circle is complete  
KC: DOES ANYONE KNOW WHY THOSE TWO GENERAL EDUCATION STUDENTS ARE HERE?  
SH: nah  
SS: The one with the mask is dating the invisible one! Kirishima filled me in on all the gossip.  
SH: you’re literally.. so precious  
SH: i didn’t think two people so not-soft looking could be so overwhelmingly cute  
SH: i understand it for everyone else, because they look soft and cute, but you look like you can and can bench press half the class  
KC: KENDOU, ASKING THE REAL QUESTIONS.  
SS: Aneduhxcicmtrde stop.. please...  
SS: My heart can only take so much.  
BA: Oh, it it flatter Tetsutetsu day?  
SH: everyday is flatter tetsutetsu day  
SH: also okay, tetsu  
SH: is your name like, actually legally tetsutetsu tetsutetsu  
SS: ...  
SS: No comment.  
SH: buddy pal chum love of my life your dads are such idiots  
SS: Listen!! It’s not their fault the whole family has idiot genes!!  
SS: Also, tetsutetsu is the first name of one and surname of the other  
BA: I’m sorry, I’m still cracking up because your name is literally ‘tetsu’ but... four times.  
SS: It’s four different kanji all prounounced the same way, if that helps.  
BA: Shit, you’re right.  
BA: Anyway, Yaoyorozu let me borrow a blanket and y’all need to get over here because I’m cold.  
SH: you’re always cold  
BA: Yes, but this is advanced cold.  
BA: Poni is my new best friend, since she got here first and is huggable.  
SH: okay hold up  
SH: i have to navigate around bakugou-kun’s pile  
SS: Understandable, you’re forgiven.  
SS: Seriously though, tonight was a lot more fun than I thought it would be.  
KC: YEAH, IF WE’RE BEING FAIR,  
KC: I DON’T LIKE THE ANGRY BLOND KID, BECAUSE HE STILL THINKS HE’S BETTER THAN US, BUT THE REST OF THEM JUST SEEM LIKE THEY WANT TO PASS THE COURSE AND BE HEROES.  
KC: SO I’M OBVIOUSLY STILL GOING TO TRY TO BEAT THEM, BUT I’LL DO IT A LITTLE NICER.  
BA: That’s both super mature and not, at the same time.  
SH: listen im proud   
SH: my baby child is growing up  
KC: KENDOU, WE’RE THE SAME AGE.  
SH: shhshhshs my baby child is growing up  
SS: Big sister instincts, don’t get in her way.  
BA: Oh, none of us will.   
SH: okay but we should really stop talking and get some sleep tho  
SS: Yeah.  
SS: G’night everyone!  
\-- steelSteel [SS] is now idle --  
AV: ~ goodnight! ~  
\-- apolisticVein [AV] is now idle --  
\-- littlePony [LP] is now idle --  
\-- bondingApathy [BA] is now idle --  
\-- kazooChild [KC] has locked [Class 1A makes really good nachos] for reason of [:)] -- 


	3. Challenges, Cosplay, and Cat Cafes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alternatively titled "Shoji Mezo makes a dick joke", "Bakugou loses his shit like four times", and "Momo is a speed-eating cryptid of the city".
> 
> A late happy birthday to my favorite explosion boy, Bakugou Katsuki! I wish you the best.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some notes: if you hover over the French in Aoyama's section, a translation will pop up! I'll put a transcript at the end for mobile users. Sorry about Hagakure's text color by the way but she's... invisible.. Comments are seriously appreciated!!
> 
> (Also,, if you have suggestions for little interactions or ships and you comment them, it's likely I'll include them in further chapters)
> 
> Kirishima - rougeRiot  
> Bakugou - temperedExplosion  
> Midoriya - splinteredMight  
> Uraraka - defyingGravity  
> Iida - existentialEngine  
> Todoroki - icyHot  
> Tokoyami - avianRevelry  
> Yaomomo - fortunateCreation  
> Jirou - soundwaveAmplified  
> Hagakure - invisibleAttacker  
> Ojiro - proudTail  
> Shouji - armedAbomination  
> Aoyama - twinklingStar  
> Satou - candymanStrength  
> Kazeonsei - sunshineSurroundings  
> Shinsou - neuralNeko  
> Tetsutetsu - steelSteel  
> Kendou - sisterlyHandling  
> Eraserhead - begrudginglyErased  
> Present Mic - deafeningOptimism  
> Best Jeanist - wovenWanderer  
> Kamui Woods - vineyardVines

**\-- armedAbomination [AA] began pestering avianRevelry [AR] at [10:43] -**  
** AA: Fumikage. **  
** AR: () Mezo. () **  
** AA: How’s your internship going? **  
** AA: Or, I’d say, how are you doing having to be somewhere other than your cave of darkness? **  
** AR: () Stfu () **  
** AR: () I’m suffering () **  
** AA: You’re suffering. **  
** AA: For being outside. **  
** AA: In the light. **  
** AA: With some excellent heroes, learning valuable hero skills. **  
** AR: () Fi ght m e () **  
** AA: You’d win, so no. **  
** AR: () Hold up. () **  
** AR: () Why are you assuming I’d win? () **  
** AA: This may sound a little self-deprecating but in all honesty, my close-combat fighting style versus the versatility of Dark Shadow is an uneven match just in general. **  
** AA: I’m thinking from a logistical standpoint here. **  
** AA: Also, tell Dark Shadow I say hi. **  
** AR: () First of all that’s solid analysis but you’re stronger than you give yourself credit for, () **  
** AR: () And second of all they didn’t say anything back but they did give off this little satisfied chirp so I’m going to say it’s appreciated. () **  
** AA: D’aww. **  
** AA: They may be a bastard bird demon but they’re thoughtful amidst the bastard bird demon-ness. **  
** AR: () Have you ever like. () **  
** AR: () Made the “d’aww” sound in real life. () **  
** AA: Yes? **  
** AR: () I’m imagining it and it’s adorable. () **  
** AA: Like you! **  
** AR: () Adwtyebfvuntimug () **  
** AR: () You Stop That Right Now. () **  
** AR: () I Have A Reputation To Maintain That Doesn’t Involve Flustered Squawking. () **  
** AA: Oh, you’re flustered? **  
** AA: Good to know. **  
** AA: :) **  
** AR: () I hate you. () **  
** AA: No you don’t. **  
** AR: () I completely despise your existence with every fiber of my being. () **  
** AA: :) **  
** AR: () Don’t you dare, I’m fluffy enough as it is right now. () **  
** AA: I’m not doing anything, you edgy baby. **  
** AR: () You’re being endearingly irritating. () **  
** AR: () Like a little sibling, except you’re significantly bigger than me. () **  
** AR: () And we’re dating. () **  
** AA: Well, at least I got endearing going for me. **  
** AR: () You have quite a bit more that I don’t feel like mentioning. () **  
** AA: :) **  
** AR: () Ajskbdfbork not that!! Shut the up fuck () **  
** AA: Well I don’t know, that sounded implied- **  
** AR: () I will skin you alive and use your bones to make myself a sword. **  
** AA: Sjlkfryo5thiytrpgjerf **  
** AA: That is the  ** **_edgiest_ ** **thing I have ever heard you say.**  
** AA: And that’s saying something considering the amount of emo Pinterest quotes I get from you on a daily basis. **  
** AA: You’re not threatening, you’re an edgy, fluffy emo bird. **  
** AR: () I’m hella threatening you absolute fool. () **  
** AA: Fluffy bird. **  
** AR: () It’s not my fault I’m fluffy!! () **  
** AR: () Besides, I get fluffier around you because you’re a badass and I’m a gay fool. () **  
** AA: All the more reason to fluster you. **  
** AA: Flustering you because you’re cute => Fluffy feathers => Even cuter => I tell you you’re cute => You get flustered, the cycle goes on. **  
** AR: () yooo so your buddy dropped his phone but yall are really cute () **  
** AA: Thank you! You might want to give it back before Dark Shadow gets pissed. **  
** AR: () oh they are! () **  
** AA: Aren’t you afraid of the massive bird demon? **  
** AR: () not particularly () **  
** AR: () hold up () **  
**\-- avianRevelry [AR] is now vineyardVines [VV] -**  
** VV: ~ mmm that’s better. ~ **  
** VV: ~ you part of 1A? ~ **  
** AA: ... **  
** AA: Vineyard Vines. **  
** VV: ~ oh ha, yeah ~ **  
** VV: ~ kamui woods, at your service ~ **  
** AA: K- kamui woods? **  
** AA: And you made your pesterchum Vineyard Vines?? **  
** VV: ~ i thought it was funny ~ **  
** AA: I mean, it is, I was just unprepared. **  
** VV: ~ back to the original question while tokoyami calms down ~ **  
** VV: ~ i take it youre part of 1A? ~ **  
** VV: ~ according to other heroes interning yall are like peas to a pod ~ **  
** AA: Yes, I’m a part of UA. **  
** VV: ~ hey wait. armed abomination. are you that one-man horse team from the cavalry battle? ~ **  
** AA: Yes? **  
** AA: I didn’t realize I was memorable. **  
** VV: ~ dude are you kidding? ~ **  
** VV: ~ it was an inventive and advantageous way to use both your quirk and your size. ~ **  
** VV: ~ plus, working with those two small ones was such a good idea! ~ **  
** VV: ~ if it weren’t for the girl with the vine hair, you could’ve made it. ~ **  
** AA: Oh. **  
** AA: Well, thank you!! **  
** VV: ~ anytime ~ **  
** VV: ~ anyway, tokoyami has calmed down now, but try not making him really fluffy and embarrassed when you talk next time, ‘m kay? ~ **  
** AA: I’ll try. **  
**\-- armedAbomination [AA] ceased pestering vineyardVines [VV] at [11:02] --**

 **\--** **begrudginglyErased [BE]** **began pestering deafeningOptimism [DO] at [10:54]-**  
**BE: ^ can you have kazeonsei yell at shinsou to take a break ^**  
**DO: KITTEN! WHAT DID YOU DO NOW?**  
**BE: ^ i didn’t do anything!! ^**  
**BE: ^ it’s not my fault he’s a stubborn fuck after my own heart ^**  
**DO: THEN (APTLY-NAMED ‘GET HIM TO HAVE ANY MUSCLE MASS WHATSOEVER’) MISSION IS PROVING TO BE MORE DIFFICULT THAN YOU EXPECTED?**  
**BE: ^ what the fuck else would i be talking about, zashi ^**  
**DO: YOU WERE BEING UNNECESSARILY CRYPTIC!**  
**BE: ^ fine ^**  
**BE: ^ i don’t know whether it’s malnutrition or sleep deprivation or just a lack of any kind of training before, but he’s not doing,,,, well ^**  
**BE: ^ more tired than usual, too ^**  
**BE: ^ i didn’t even think that was possible ^**  
**DO: ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE IF ONE PUTS THEIR MIND TO IT.**  
**BE: ^ shut the fuck up you welcome to night vale ripoff ^**  
**DO: FNRNBTGBUVIRCN,MIXE, EXCUSE YOU, YOU FUCKING HEATHEN**  
**DO: MY RADIO SHOW IS TOP NOTCH! TOP OF THE LINE!!**  
**BE: ^ mhm ^**  
**BE: ^ it also keeps you up all fucking night and makes tsuki miserable ^**  
**DO: THAT’S BECAUSE TSUKI IS A LAZY GIRL WHO SLEEPS ALL THE TIME AND GETS UPSET EVERY TIME SOMEONE GETS IN BETWEEN HER AND SLEEP**  
**BE: ^ don’t slander our daughter’s name like this ^**  
**DO: DARLING, SHE’S A CAT**  
**BE: ^ our d a u g h t e r ^**  
**DO: BACK TO THE ORIGINAL DISCUSSION!**  
**DO: DO YOU THINK A LACK OF SLEEP MIGHT BE ENVIRONMENTAL?**  
**DO: MAYBE THE AREA WHERE HE LIVES GETS A LOT OF NOISE AT NIGHT.**  
**BE: ^ it’s always a possibility ^**  
**BE: ^ let me ask him ^**  
**BE: ^ well, actually. ^**  
**BE: ^ does kazeonsei have a pesterchum? ^**  
**DO: IN ALL HONESTY, I’VE NEVER ASKED.**  
**DO: LET ME JUST...**  
**DO: OKAY, SO ONE, SHE DOES, AND TWO, I’VE NEVER SEEN SOMEONE DO THAT EXCITED ANIME EYE SPARKLE IN REAL LIFE, AND IT’S ADORABLE.**  
**DO: HER HANDLE IS ‘sunshineSurroundings’**  
**BE: ^ so that was her ^**  
**BE: ^ alright, i’m going to make a memo for the four of us ^**  
**DO: ?**  
**BE: ^ having the two of them together is better for overall development since they’re better at taking care of each other than themselves, and it’ll be easier to keep an eye on them. ^**  
**BE: ^ plus, shinsou needs a training partner closer to his own age ^**  
**DO: AS INTUITIVE AS EVER!**  
**DO: LOCK NAMING PERMISSIONS PLEASE.**  
**BE: ^ ... ^**  
**BE: ^ wh y ^**  
**DO: NO REASON!**  
**DO: KAZEONSEI SIMPLY KNOWS HOW TO GET UNDER PEOPLE’S SKIN.**  
**BE: ^ just to spite you im not going to do that ^**  
**DO: YOU’RE DIGGING YOUR OWN GRAVE, KITTEN!**  
**BE: ^ whatever, just accept the invite when i send it to you and don’t stay up until 3 tonight just to wake me up with your cold feet ^**  
**\--** **begrudginglyErased [BE]** **ceased pestering deafeningOptimism [DO] [16:09]--**

 **\--** **begrudginglyErased [BE]** **created [Mentors] and added deafeningOptimism [DO] and neuralNeko [NN] and sunshineSurroundings [SS] at [10:10]--**  
**\-- neuralNeko [NN] changed the name to [Family Group Chat] at [10:10]--**  
**\-- sunshineSurroundings [SS] changed the name to [La Familia] [10:11]--**  
**SS: Aw, you beat me to it.**  
**NN: :3**  
**BE: ^ why am i not surprised ^**  
**SS: Eraserhead!**  
**BE: ^ yes, unfortunately ^**  
**DO: THAT’S A SOLID MOOD, ERASER, BUT WE HAVE ACTUALLY SERIOUS ADULT THINGS TO TALK ABOUT.**  
**DO: ALSO, I WARNED YOU ABOUT THE NAMING PERMISSIONS.**  
**NN: I am now Nervous** **TM**  
**SS: Listen, unless you broke another door there’s literally no possible reason to be nervous.**  
**BE: ^ another door? ^**  
**BE: ^ y’know what, i’m not going to ask ^**  
**BE: ^ we’re here to talk about sleeping habits ^**  
**\-- neuralNeko [NN] is now idle --**  
**SS: I’d like to revise my earlier comment.**  
**SS: There is one possible reason to be nervous.**  
**SS: I’ll go get him.**  
**\-- neuralNeko [NN] is now online -**  
**NN: Can we make this as short and painless as humanly possible.**  
**BE: ^ only once i get actual answers to your approximate sleeping schedule ^**  
**NN: Hhhh so what if I don’t actually have... answers?**  
**BE: ^ elaborate ^**  
**NN: Like, my sleep schedule tends to vary enough day to day that most evenings are a hazy fog.**  
**NN: So I don’t have a lot of definable answers, to sleeping and stuff.**  
**BE: ^ ... ^**  
**DO: ERASER.**  
**BE: ^ you do realize that’s detrimental to your academic and physical performance? ^**  
**NN: Yeah, obviously.**  
**NN: Environmental factors are a thing.**  
**NN: Our neighbors are kinda dicks and blare music all night, and there’s been construction going on for the past year.**  
**NN: Not an easy melody to fall asleep to.**  
**SS: Plus, there’s that kid down the hall that can’t sleep with the lights off and although the night light isn’t too bad it makes falling asleep all the harder.**  
**NN: Gotta wake up pretty early to do morning chores and get to school on time, too.**  
**SS: I cover for you most of the time, Mr. “Staying up until 3 in the morning studying is good for my grades”**  
**NN: Yes, but which one of us has all A’s**  
**SS: Oh, shut up.**  
**DO: OKAY, BACK UP.**  
**DO: YOU TWO LIVE TOGETHER?**  
**SS: Yeah, we got moved to the same group home after we made it into UA so we can get here faster.**  
**BE: ^ group home ^**  
**NN: Yeah.**  
**NN: Long, mildly traumatizing story.**  
**DO: ALRIGHT THEN!**  
**DO: THAT SEEMS TO BE CONVERSATION FOR A LATER DATE, OR POSSIBLY NEVER.**  
**SS: Damn right.**  
**NN: Also, did you know that your handles spell out ‘be’ and ‘do’**  
**BE: ^ yes? ^**  
**NN: Was that... intentional?**  
**DO: YES**  
**BE: ^ no ^**  
**BE: ^ goddamnit, mic ^**  
**SS: :3c**  
**NN: >:3c**  
**SS: > :3c**  
**NN: >:3c**  
**SS: :3c**  
**DO: A+ FOR TEAMWORK, F FOR BEING LITTLE SHITS.**  
**SS: Gasp, you swore.**  
**BE: ^ im going back to sleep ^**  
**DO: NO, YOU’RE NOT**  
**BE: ^ why not ^**  
**DO: YOU HAVE TO TEACH A CLASS, ERASER.**  
**BE: ^ and ^**  
**DO: I FEEL LIKE I SHOULDN’T NEED TO ANSWER THIS QUESTION.**  
**SS: Do you need like.**  
**SS: Coffee?**  
**SS: Because Toshi and I were going to head over to get some and I’m sure we can pick you up a cup.**  
**BE: ^ i don’t think that’s allowed ^**  
**SS: Consider it a gift from a concerned pseudo-student.**  
**BE: ^ ... ^**  
**BE: ^ alright, thank you. ^**  
**NN: No problem, you look ten minutes from literally dying.**  
**NN: Be warned, Eichi gets hers with unreasonable amounts of sugar and might put some in yours.**  
**SS: I don’t drink coffee for the caffeine, I drink it for the taste.**  
**DO: BUT COFFEE IS JUST... GROSS.**  
**SS: Not if it’s got cream and caramel in it!**  
**BE: ^ is it even still considered coffee then ^**  
**SS: Yes.**  
**NN: No.**  
**SS: Square up you soggy potato chip of a human being,**  
**NN: I’m good.**  
**DO: YOU TWO REMIND ME OF ERASER AND MIDNIGHT BACK WHEN WE WERE IN SCHOOL.**  
**DO: THERE WAS ONE TIME!**  
**BE: ^ you need to stop talking ^**  
**NN: Please keep talking.**  
**DO: SO IT WAS MAYBE 10, GETTING LATE, AND MIDNIGHT AND ERASER AND I STAYED BEHIND TO TRAIN WITH EACH OTHER AND WHEN WE WERE DONE MIDNIGHT SUGGESTED ‘HEY WHY DON’T WE GET SOME BOBA TEA’**  
**DO: AND ERASER’S ALREADY A LITTLE ASLEEP AT THIS POINT SO WE ALL SORT OF DRAG HIM DOWN TO THIS SHOP AND ORDER TEA.**  
**BE: ^ i will ban you ^**  
**DO: AND SHOUTA, IN HIS SLEEP DEPRIVED TRAINING-WEAKENED FUNK,**  
**\-- deafeningOptimism [DO] has been banned for ten [10] minutes --**  
**NN: Aw, c’mon Aizawa-sensei.**  
**SS: He was getting to the good part!**  
**SS: We’re almost there with your coffee, btw.**  
**BE: ^ there is no good part to that story ^**  
**BE: ^ only teenage disappointment ^**  
**BE: ^ and a trip to the clinic ^**  
**SS: Wait, what?**  
**BE: ^ i told you all that i’m saying ^**  
**NN: :3**  
**NN: There’s more to this story.**  
**NN: And I am getting it.**  
**SS: Please don’t do something irredeemably stupid or I’m going to have to murder you.**  
**NN: Oh, I welcome the cold embrace of death.**  
**SS: Don’t we all?**  
**BE: ^ wow you two are dark ^**  
**SS: Our generation’s sense of humor is dark at best and gruesome at worst.**  
**BE: ^ hmm ^**  
**BE: ^ nihilistic children; not a good sign for the future ^**  
**NN: I’d like to think we’re painfully optimistic.**  
**NN: I mean, you have to be pretty optimistic to get into UA.**  
**NN: We’re just depressed.**  
**BE: ^ i cant tell if you’re being serious but i’m going to go with ‘maybe’ and make a note of it. ^**  
**NN: Dammit.**  
**BE: ^ im your teacher, and id like to think im a good one ^**  
**BE: ^ having good mental health is important ^**  
**\-- deafeningOptimism [DO] is online! --**  
**DO: THAT’S VERY TRUE!**  
**DO: I HAVE BEEN FORCEFULLY INFORMED BY SOMEONE (WITH AN IRRITATING FLYING SCARF) THAT EMBARASSING STORIES FROM OUR UA DAYS ARE NOT FOR STUDENTS.**  
**DO: OH WELL!**  
**NN: Well fuck.**  
**SS: Eraser-sensei, would you mind if I asked about your capture weapon?**  
**BE: ^ not at all. ^**  
**SS: So.**  
**SS: How does it... fly..**  
**SS: I know your quirk is Erasure, but that doesn’t have anything about your floating hair when you use it, and your scarf.**  
**BE: ^ oh ^**  
**BE: ^ uh ^**  
**BE: ^ if i answer that you have to promise not to tell midoriya because he’s excellent at quirk analysis but he’s also invasive with his questions ^**  
**NN: Done.**  
**SS: That seems fair.**  
**BE: ^ i also have a minor secondary quirk that activates with erasure and it... ^**  
**BE: ^ bonds? to certain items. ^**  
**BE: ^ it’s one of the few reasons i keep my hair longer, because i can feel when things happen to it more acutely than is normal and cutting it is unpleasant. ^**  
**SS: That is beyond cool, wow.**  
**SS: Does it only apply to things you can see, or could you use your capture weapon on someone behind you?**  
**BE: ^ i can use it anywhere as long as it doesn’t run into something unexpected ^**  
**BE: ^ good question though ^**  
**NN: So if someone like, cut through your capture weapon, you’d feel it?**  
**BE: ^ to an extent, yes ^**  
**BE: ^ i wouldn’t feel it like i would a limb ^**  
**BE: ^ something cutting it off feels a bit like someone shaving a part of my teeth off. ^**  
**SS: Hhhh.**  
**SS: That’s unpleasant.**  
**BE: ^ yes ^**  
**SS: Thank you, that’s a question that’s been bugging me for a while.**  
**SS: Villains you capture must be so confused.**  
**SS: Also, Toshi, we need to be getting home, Hayairifuto-san needs us.**  
**NN: Dammit.**  
**NN: I’ll meet you outside, I need to pick something up.**  
**\-- neuralNeko [NN] is idle --**

 **\--** **temperedExplosion [TE]** **began pestering** **rougeRiot [RR]** **at [13:34] --**  
**TE: save me from this fashion HELL i am literally going to murder someone**  
**RR: - < Okay, calm down. >-**  
**RR: - < What did Best Jeanist do now? >-**  
**TE: im wearing jeans!! and it’s very uncomfortable!!**  
**RR: - < His hero name is literally Best Jeanist, Bakubro. >-**  
**TE: i know but like, fuck this**  
**TE: i wanna do fucking hero stuff like fight villains and rescue people and fight things, not parade around with stupid brushed hair**  
**TE: and why is there so much p a p e r w o r k**  
**RR: - < You’re asking me, critical dumbass. >-**  
**RR: - < Tetsu and I just finished making tea and we’re taking a break from sorting case files. >-**  
**RR: - < This dude is working us to the bone. >-**  
**TE: okay wait hol up**  
**TE: class b you is there too??**  
**RR: - < He has a name, first of all. >-**  
**RR: - < And yeah! We both got the same offer and accepted it. >-**  
**RR: - < ‘parrently he’s got a thing for strength. >-**  
**TE: well shit at least you have a friend**  
**TE: he keeps telling me stuff like ‘you need to deal with your resting bitch face’ and ‘stop telling people you’ll kill them, it’s not hero-like’**  
**TE: like hell i’m not hero-like!!**  
**RR: - < Listen, you’re the manliest dude I know and your heart is spot-on, but it’s kind of hard to tell when you’re screaming at people! >-**  
**RR: - < Best Jeanist is the number four pro hero! He probably knows what he’s talking about. >-**  
**TE: dkxbmgfrimgt god, i hate you when you’re right**  
**RR: - < Wow, good thing I’m not right often. >-**  
**TE: you stop with that sadsack bullshit right now, shitty face**  
**TE: you’re right a whole bunch of the time**  
**RR: - < Bakubro I’m in like, 8 remedial classes. >-**  
**TE: so?**  
**TE: im in one and im number 3 in the class**  
**TE: school and being smart are two very separate things**  
**TE: besides, you’re still better at some things than i am, you just cant study efficiently**  
**TE: so i hate you when you’re right bc u know what??**  
**TE: i don’t think someone who traded in their hair for brains is allowed to be that smart**  
**RR: - < aksljdfngtlhm >-**  
**RR: - < Tha nks >-**  
**RR: - < I need ed that >-**  
**TE: anytime, nerd**  
**TE: now, i need you to help me murder best jeanist**  
**RR: - < I’m not going to let you murder Best Jeanist. >-**  
**TE: traitor, i thought you tolerated me**  
**RR: - < Listen, if you murder Best Jeanist, you won’t be bae anymore. >-**  
**RR: - < You’ll be fam. >-**  
**TE: excu se me w h at**  
**RR: - < Bakubro please it’s a vine, you uncultured swine. >-**  
**TE: oh, bite me**  
**RR: - < Kinky >-**  
**TE: please stop i’m literally dying**  
**TE: LOG OFF BEST JEANIST IS COMINGBHFBDFXYR**  
**TE: How does this server work?**  
**RR: - < Bakubae? >-**  
**TE: This is Best Jeanist.**  
**RR: - < Oh, uh, okay. >-**  
**TE: I made sure my protégé turned off all communications unless they were related to working, so how is he able to contact you?**  
**RR: - < Oh! This is pesterchum!! >-**  
**RR: - < It’s from some webcomic called Homestuck I never bothered reading >-**  
**RR: - < It’s an outside way of communication that’s not monitored by the school, so we use it for memes and personal stuff. >-**  
**TE: Oh, pesterchum, how could I not recognize it.**  
**\--** **temperedExplosion [TE]** **is now** **wovenWanderer [WW]** **\--**  
**WW: That’s better.**  
**WW: Would you mind me asking who you are? I haven’t seen him actually smile since he got here until now.**  
**RR: - < Heheheh that dork >-**  
**RR: - < I’m Kirishima!! >-**  
**RR: - < Kirishima Eijirou >-**  
**RR: - < I’m interning with Fourth Kind right now. >-**  
**WW: Interesting.**  
**WW: I don’t think I’ll take away this communication. Make sure he doesn’t blow someone up, please.**  
**\--** **wovenWanderer [WW]** **is now** **temperedExplosion [TE]** **\--**  
**TE: HE TOOK MY PH ON E**  
**RR: - < Hey, bro, calm down. >-**  
**RR: - < He just wanted to know who I was. >-**  
**RR: - < And why you were smiling!! >-**  
**RR: - < :} >-**  
**TE: you’re fucking lucky i don’t find you insufferable, prick**  
**TE: i’d have blown you up hardness or not a long time ago**  
**RR: - < I have met top standards >-**  
**RR: - < Bakugou standards >-**  
**TE: damn right**  
**RR: - < Fuck shit Fourth Kind’s coming back, talk to you later!! >-**  
**\--** **rougeRiot [RR]** **ceased pestering** **temperedExplosion [TE]** **at [14:01] --**  
**TE: ha, idiot**

 **\--** **steelSteel [SS]** **began pestering** **sisterlyHandling [SH]** **at [15:45]--**  
**SH: oh thank god, please distract me**  
**SS: That bad?**  
**SH: i have to be a model, tetsu, im going to pass out by the end of today and sleep for the rest of the week**  
**SS: Tjdehlnrtiogef you’re modeling??**  
**SS: I thought you were at your internship!**  
**SH: i am**  
**SH: she keeps going on about ‘keeping a public image’ and ‘working more than one job is important’ but honestly?**  
**SH: she just likes having attention**  
**SH: and i don’t**  
**SH: yaoyorozu and i are suffering**  
**SS: I feel so bad for you.**  
**SS: At least you have Yaoyorozu with you! Having a friend makes the work so much easier.**  
**SS: Kirishima and I are supposed to be doing paperwork but we finished ten minutes ago so we’re taking a break.**  
**SH: valid**  
**SH: yaoyorozu says hello and also if kirishima is laughing its probably the reason why bakugou is yelling angrily in another chat**  
**SS: Oh, I was curious about that!**  
**SS: He is.**  
**SS: He’s laughing pretty hard, actually.**  
**SS:** **sunshinesmile.jpeg**  
**SH: appropriate name**  
**SH: those fuckin... teeth, tho**  
**SH: if someone was into vore it would be their dream**  
**SS: Why does this even occur to you??**  
**SS: Why?**  
**SH: listen im bored and the boy has unbelievably pointy teef**  
**SH: just like you!!**  
**SH: vore dream team, buddy**  
**SS: Please stop.**  
**SS: I’m not into vore.**  
**SH: :)**  
**SH: >:)**  
**SH: > :0**  
**SH: >:)**  
**SS: I hate you.**  
**SH: u know u love me.**  
**SS: Damn.. it’s true..**  
**SH: ha gottem!**  
**SH: god this place is frying my brain**  
**SH: my internal mom instincts have no one to mom over because im with the class A mom(o) so im starting to want to do stupid shit**  
**SH: do u think if i ran off the roof really fast and flapped my hands i could fly?**  
**SS: Normally I’d say do it, but Vlad-sensei would be so disappointed and Monoma would laugh you out of class for weeks.**  
**SS: Also... you’d like, die.**  
**SH: smh who knew you were responsible**  
**SS: Oh, I’m not.**  
**SS: Today I hit a solid steel wall because I wanted to prove I was stronger than it and I vibrated really hard and it was super uncomfy.**  
**SH: buddy**  
**SS: I know, I know.**  
**SH: stop throwing urself at things harder than u because guess what! They win!**  
**SS: Fight me, handsy!!!**  
**SH: wow rude**  
**SH: i speak only the truth, metalboy**  
**SS: :(**  
**SS: Fourth Kind is coming back, but I’ll talk to you when I have the chance!**  
**SH: see ya later alligator <>**  
**SS: In a while crocodile! <>**  
**\--** **steelSteel [SS]** **ceased pestering** **sisterlyHandling [SH]** **at [16:32]--**

 **\--** **fortunateCreation [FC]** **began pestering** **icyHot [IH]** **at [16:23]--**  
**FC: << Do you know how Tenya’s doing? >>**  
**IH: [[ no, he hasn’t talked to me a lot recently ]]**  
**IH: [[ he’s still a little fucked up about tensei ]]**  
**FC: << That’s understandable. >>**  
**FC: << The pain of almost losing a sibling? >>**  
**FC: << It’s unbearable. >>**  
**FC: << We need to let him know we’re here for him. >>**  
**IH: [[ yes. ]]**  
**IH: [[ i feel like for now? hes at his internship, he’s stressed, hes mourning his brother’s career: i feel like we should give him a little bit of space until internships are over ]]**  
**IH: [[ remember how i didn’t want to talk for weeks after toya disappeared ]]**  
**FC: << You have a point. >>**  
**FC: << Let’s hope internships will give him time to work out some of his grief. >>**  
**FC: << He always has been a stickler for the technical parts of hero work. >>**  
**IH: [[ remember when we were kids and he would beg to help tensei with his paperwork? ]]**  
**IH: [[ god i am so fucking tired of paperwork ]]**  
**IH: [[ i almost prefer getting the shit beat out of me to this ]]**  
**FC: << Shouto. >>**  
**IH: [[ im kidding im kidding ]]**  
**IH: [[ this is infinitely preferred to getting the shit beat out of me by my dad ]]**  
**IH: [[ still i keep getting drawn back to this little tiny crack in the ceiling? ]]**  
**IH: [[ it’s blue ]]**  
**FC: << Shouto, you’re such a mood but the way you casually talk about your childhood abuse in a joking manner is worrying. >>**  
**IH: [[ momo i need to cope somehow ]]**  
**IH: [[ my dad literally refers to his children, myself included, as his things ]]**  
**IH: [[ if i wanna make shitty jokes about how much paperwork he’s procrastinating on then i will, dammit. ]]**  
**FC: << Fine. >>**  
**FC: << This issue isn’t just going to go away, you know? >>**  
**IH: [[ .. ]]**  
**IH: [[ i know, i do ]]**  
**IH: [[ i kind of wish it did ]]**  
**IH: [[ i kind of wish i could just,,, forget about him, forget about his existence and move on from the painful dream that was my childhood ]]**  
**IH: [[ it’s been working so far. ]]**  
**FC: << When you have to come up with a more concrete solution, Tenya and I will be behind you. >>**  
**IH: [[ thank god for that ]]**  
**IH: [[ so if im stuck doing paperwork and trying to see what’s beyond this crack, what’re you doing? ]]**  
**FC: << ... >>**  
**FC: << I don’t want to talk about it. >>**  
**IH: [[ spill the tea, momo ]]**  
**FC: << She’s making us be models!! We’re modeling! >>**  
**IH: [[ hol y shit ]]**  
**IH: [[ like, professionally? ]]**  
**FC: << We’re going to be on TV, Shouto. >>**  
**FC: << I hate this so much! What does this have to do with hero work? >>**  
**IH: [[ hero work is as much publicity as it is actually fighting villains ]]**  
**IH: [[ who’s there with you? ]]**  
**FC: << Oh, it’s Kendou! From 1B? >>**  
**IH: [[ oh the big hands girl, she’s nice ]]**  
**FC: << She’s lovely, really. We were discussing what it’s like being a parental figure to our respective classes and trading stories/notes. >>**  
**FC: << She has a pesterchum too? >>**  
**IH: [[ youre mom pals trading phone numbers and stories about your dumb children ]]**  
**FC: << Yes. >>**  
**FC: << That is exactly what we’re doing. >>**  
**IH: [[ finally someone other than tenya whos responsible ]]**  
**IH: [[ yall need a ‘look at these fuckin idiots’ groupchat to yell at us ]]**  
**IH: [[ so, who’s her tenya ]]**  
**FC: << Awase, the one who can fuse objects. >>**  
**FC: << He seems nice enough if a bit flippant. >>**  
**IH: [[ gives off shinsou energy; I like him ]]**  
**FC: << Most people call that Todoroki energy. >>**  
**IH: [[ excuse me what ]]**  
**FC: << You’ve got that sort of... >>**  
**FC: << ‘I can and would kick your ass if I wouldn’t get in trouble’ energy >>**  
**IH: [[ do i really though ]]**  
**FC: << I’ve had separate people say that you’re extremely intimidating until they get to know the dumb, dorky you. >>**  
**IH: [[ must be the emotional repression ]]**  
**IH: [[ im not dorky! ]]**  
**FC: << Shouto, you own multiple sets of Yugioh cards. >>**  
**IH: [[ shut the up fuck ]]**  
**FC: << :0 >>**  
**FC: << Never. >>**  
**IH: [[ f i g h t m e ]]**  
**FC: << Shouto I’d literally die. >>**  
**IH: [[ u know i wouldn’t kill u if my life depended on it ]]**  
**FC: << You always say the sweetest things. >>**  
**IH: [[ so i figured out what’s behind this crack ]]**  
**IH: [[ its some kind of training room? ]]**  
**IH: [[ dads sidekicks are having a ‘who can jump the highest’ contest ]]**  
**IH: [[ this one guy with spring legs is winning ]]**  
**FC: << Oh, that sounds like fun! >>**  
**FC: << Are the sidekicks like Endeavor, or are they better? >>**  
**IH: [[ overall the sidekicks are scoring unbelievably high on my niceness scale ]]**  
**IH: [[ pretty powerful too ]]**  
**IH: [[ id bet most of them, if more powerful, would make excellent pros ]]**  
**IH: [[ hellfire’s a bit hard to beat ]]**  
**FC: << Oh, that’s true. >>**  
**FC: << Still, I’m glad you found a touch of kindness in that place. >>**  
**IH: [[ me too ]]**  
**IH: [[ once we get back to the dorms i wanna try something ]]**  
**FC: << Elaborate. >>**  
**IH: [[ so if i like, turned up the heat a lil bit on my left and cracked an egg on it, would i cook the egg? ]]**  
**IH: [[ or would midoriya just laugh his ass off at me as i got covered in wet egg ]]**  
**FC: << ... >>**  
**FC: << That wasn’t what I had expected, but I personally think you’d cook it to some extent. >>**  
**FC: << What even prompts this kind of thinking? >>**  
**IH: [[ im rlly bored and dad still refuses to believe i need adderall which is making doing my job unrealistically hard ]]**  
**FC: << Your dad is such a fucking scumbag. >>**  
**IH: [[ ill deal with it until i get back ]]**  
**IH: [[ not his fault if i can’t get his dumb paperwork done ]]**  
**IH: [[ i do have to go on patrol with him now, but ill talk to u later ]]**  
**FC: << Have fun! Kick some ass for me. >>**  
**IH: [[ will do ]]**  
**\-- fortunateCreation [FC] ceased pestering icyHot [IH] [17:41] --**

 **\-- proudTail [PT] began pestering neuralNeko [NN] at [14:41] --**  
**PT: is this shinsou**  
**NN: Yes?**  
**NN: Is this Ojiro?**  
**PT: ya**  
**PT: tooru gave me your handle because she’s irritating**  
**NN: I mean, mood.**  
**NN: Not very creative with your name.**  
**PT: at least i’m not a cat furry**  
**NN: I hate to inform you,**  
**NN: But you literally have a tail.**  
**PT: dfnhcutmyr excuse you, pebble**  
**PT: it’s my quirk and you can fight me**  
**PT: square up**  
**NN: I hate to admit it but you’d literally kick my ass, so no.**  
**PT: ill still fight u**  
**NN: D: <**  
**PT: :0**  
**PT: >:)**  
**NN: Shenanigans aside, what do you want.**  
**PT: howd u become a homestuck**  
**NN: I fail to see how this is relevant**  
**PT: answer the question**  
**NN: Sigh**  
**NN: Eichi and I were bored and browsing the internet in the same room, she calls me over to look at this webcomic she found and we both really like it.**  
**NN: Fast forward to me, two weeks later, sitting in bed at 3 in the morning and on page 6900 watching John about to kick Caliborn’s ass.**  
**NN: I was wrong.**  
**NN: I mean, I was right.**  
**NN: But still so, so wrong.**  
**PT: fuck**  
**PT: that’s fucking,,, game over, isn’t it.**  
**NN: Mhm.**  
**PT: when i got to game over i think i cried?**  
**PT: it was awful**  
**NN: He just! Killed off everyone! In one video!**  
**NN: Dave was probably the hardest for me to deal with.**  
**NN: Like, I was already fucked up over Jade and Jane being all evil, plus Jade’s untimely death.**  
**NN: But then!! Dave!**  
**NN: Time manipulation quirk and he died defending a dead body.**  
**NN: I had to take a break for a week or two just to adjust.**  
**PT: i think rose’s scream after kanaya got zapped was the worst part**  
**PT: because like, we see their whole relationship and story playing out an they’re starting to grow as people**  
**PT: and kanaya goes to defend her moirail**  
**PT: and then rose physically sees her die and can’t do anything about it and ive written that scene to get a better feel of it and i can almost hear that scream**  
**PT: it really fucked me over**  
**NN: Damn.**  
**NN: Nice to know we’re both dramatic fucks.**  
**NN: Now, my turn.**  
**NN: Who’s your favorite?**  
**PT: i’d say vriska for the meme but honestly?**  
**PT: either rose or john**  
**PT: maybe sollux**  
**NN: Solid choices.**  
**PT: you?**  
**NN: Dave, no question.**  
**NN: Just... the whole thing about him developing from this weird irony-obsessed fratboy into a picture-taking taxidermy gay dork who makes mixtapes is the most satisfying character arc I’ve ever seen.**  
**NN: Also Davekat.**  
**PT: but dave and terezi...**  
**NN: You need to back the fuck up.**  
**NN: While Daverezi is a valid ship that was pre game over and Davekat is absolutely more canon.**  
**PT: let me have my ships**  
**PT: as valid as davekat is dave and terezi have a bond built over a much longer and more developed span of time and despite their shortcomings and the love triangle with karkat’s lingering feelings for terezi i feel like before game over they could’ve worked it out into a karkat <>terezi<3dave with a possible side of karkat<3<dave**  
**NN: ...**  
**NN: I hate it but you’re right.**  
**PT: :)**  
**PT: i know my quadrant theory dammit**  
**PT: its one of the things that made the most sense to me in homestuck**  
**PT: gots myself a moirail and everything**  
**NN: No shit?**  
**PT: yea**  
**NN: Me too.**  
**PT: :0!!**  
**PT: is it kazeonsei**  
**NN: Yes. Is yours Hagakure?**  
**PT: mhm**  
**PT: we’re so fucking lame**  
**NN: Yes.**  
**NN: Yes we are.**  
**PT: okay i need your help settling a bet hold up.**  
**NN: ?**  
**PT: gimme a sec im adding you to a chat**  
**NN: Got it.**  
**\-- proudTail [PT] ceased pestering neuralNeko [NN] at [14:59]--**

 **[PLANNING] [13:58]**  
**\-- temperedExplosion [TE] is online --**  
**TE: if i get scolded or laughed at one more fucking time today i am going to literally skin someone alive**  
**TE: wait**  
**TE: fuck**  
**\-- invisibleAttacker [IA] is online --**  
**IA: DID YOU PICK THE WRONG CHAT?**  
**TE: no fuck you invisibabble**  
**IA: WOW, RUDE!!**  
**IA: IT WAS AN EARNEST QUESTION MURDERFACE MCGEE**  
**TE: fuck off!!**  
**TE: not my fault asshido names everything in all caps**  
**\-- fortunateCreation [FC] is online --**  
**FC: << I heard down the grapevine that Best Jeanist stole your phone? >>**  
**TE:** ** _who told you that_**  
**FC: << Kirishima told Tetsutetsu about it, and he told Kendou, and she told me and gave me a few pictures of Kirishima laughing at you that Tetsutetsu sent her. >>**  
**IA: THAT REALLY IS DOWN THE GRAPEVINE, HUH.**  
**FC: << Yes, yes it is. >>**  
**FC: << ****sunshinesmile.jpeg** ** >>**  
**IA: AWW, CUTE!**  
**PT: kirishima is too precious for this world**  
**PT: like kouda but redder and louder**  
**TE: SOMEONE IS GOING TO DIE**  
**TE: SLOWLY**  
**TE: AND PAINFULLY**  
**PT: please don’t kill any innocent bystanders**  
**TE: FUCK THE BYSTANDERS**  
**PT: wow rude**  
**PT: i am not going to do that**  
**IA: NKLCDOGUFVEIB**  
**IA: MASHI, PLEASE.**  
**FC: << What’s gotten you so worked up, Bakugou? >>**  
**TE: that stupid red idiot thinks he’s allowed to laugh at me with his dumb pointy teeth and shitty pointy hair and get away with it**  
**TE: just because i tolerate his presence doesn’t mean he gets to make fun of me**  
**FC: << That’s usually what friends do. >>**  
**TE: where did I say we were friends?**  
**PT: ...**  
**PT: are you telling me you aren’t friends**  
**TE: it was never confirmed**  
**IA: IT ISN’T SOME SHIP ON A TV SHOW, BAKUGOU, IT’S FRIENDSHIP.**  
**TE: well friendship doesn’t have a fucking manual now, does it**  
**PT: have you like never had friends before**  
**TE: why would i need friends, i’m the best.**  
**FC: << I’d like to remind you that you’re not actually the best. >>**  
**TE: says who**  
**FC: << The class vice president and the current holder of the #1 academic spot. >>**  
**PT: haha gottem**  
**PT: srsly tho did you legit just never have any friends**  
**TE: no??**  
**IA: THAT’S JUST ABOUT THE SADDEST THING I EVER HEARD GET SAID.**  
**TE: we do not homestuck in this household**  
**TE: fuck, i sound like zappy**  
**TE: look what you’ve done to me**  
**IA: YOU KILLED MASHI**  
**IA: I THINK HE’S CRYING**  
**IA: HE IS.**  
**TE: tail you weakling**  
**PT: excuse me there is nothing more ironic then u saying ‘we do not homestuck in this household’ on**  
**PT: p e st e r ch u m**  
**TE: there are more ironic things**  
**PT: u wanna bet**  
**TE: i have a list of examples**  
**PT: im bringing in a third party to judge**  
**IA: :0**  
**IA: YOU HAVE FRIENDS?**  
**PT: hey fuck you**  
**\-- proudTail [PT] added neuralNeko [NN] to [PLANNING] at [15:00] --**  
**NN: Ojiro, what exactly am I supposed to do here?**  
**NN: :)**  
**IA: OH THAT THIRD PARTY.**  
**NN: Nice to see it’s make fun of local tailman day.**  
**IA: THAT’S MY JOB, YOU JUST NEED TO BE CUTE AND GIVE ME AMMUNITION.**  
**NN: Excuse me, what?**  
**PT: hey tooru how about you stop talking**  
**TE: do you want my examples or not, tailboy**  
**PT: yeah yeah okay**  
**PT: shinsou bakugou decided that there’s something more ironic than saying ‘we do not homestuck in this household’ on pesterchum**  
**NN: Ohh, that’s a hard one to beat.**  
**TE: my old man’s dog chewed up his dog school obedience training certificate and the no-chewing spray, for one**  
**NN: That wins.**  
**PT: aww c’mon**  
**PT: that’s no fair**  
**NN: I hope you owe him money, idiot.**  
**IA: YOU THREE ARE ALL DORKS, BUT WE DO HAVE INTERNSHIPS DO BE DOING.**  
**PT: we’re eating lunch right now, and i’m also taking notes about safely apprehending villains**  
**TE: like i said, best jeanist and i are on patrol and i am twenty seconds from murdering him**  
**PT: don’t murder the number four hero, please**  
**TE: watch me**  
**NN: Eraser-sensei is going to kick my ass if I stay on here for much longer, actually, so I gotta split.**  
**PT: oof good luck**  
**\-- neuralNeko [NN] is now offline! --**

 **\-- splinteredMight [SM] began pestering icyHot [IH] at [20:13]--**  
**SM:** **location1.ath**  
**IH: [[ midoriya?]]**  
**\-- splinteredMight [SM] ceased pestering icyHot [IH] at [20:13]--**

 **[do we really need a name for this we’ve known each other like, forever] [22:23]**  
**\-- icyHot [IH] is now online --**  
**IH: [[ eyyy momo ]]**  
**\-- extistentialEngine [EE] is now online --**  
**EE: {{ LEGAL CONSEQUENCES, SHOUTO }}**  
**IH: [[ fuck legal consequences its momo ]]**  
**\-- fortunateCreation [FC] is now online --**  
**FC: << What on earth happened to you two? >>**  
**FC: << I saw you ****_both _****along with Midoriya on the Hosu Incident broadcast, so obviously something went horribly. >>**  
**EE: {{ WE ARE LEGALLY FORBIDDEN FROM TALKING ABOUT IT }}**  
**FC: << I’m not going to go telling people about it! I’m just worried sick. >>**  
**IH: [[ im telling her ]]**  
**EE: {{ SHOUTO, PLEASE. }}**  
**IH: [[ iida went on a bout of vigilante justice and hunted stain down and challenged him to a duel]]**  
**IH: [[ and long story short he got stabbed, midoriya showed up out of nowhere and got sliced but he sent his location and since i was in the area i showed up ]]**  
**IH: [[ and now the hero killer is in jail ]]**  
**IH: [[ and everyone’s hands are fucked up ]]**  
**IH: [[ i think it’s me ]]**  
**EE: {{ YOU’RE INTOXICATED ON PAINKILLERS. YOU HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH MINE AND MIDORIYA’S BAD HANDS. }}**  
**FC: << Iida Tenya We Are Going Back To The Topic At Hand. >>**  
**FC: << Namely, ‘I am going to go, alone, after the ****_fucking hero killer. Stain, the hero killer, who has killed like 12 professional heroes._** **Sounds like a grand idea for a grieving hero student!’ >>**  
**FC: << What the hell were you thinking!? You could’ve died!! >>**  
**FC: << Tensei would never forgive himself! Your parents would be devastated, Shouto and I would be devastated, you’d never be able to fulfill your dream because you’d be ****_gone. _****> >**  
**FC: << Sheer words cannot express the disappointment I have in you. >>**  
**FC: << God! I could’ve been helping, we both could have helped, there are ten thousand solutions to this problem and you chose the ****_one_** **that involved vigilante justice. >>**  
**IH: [[ he’ll be back in a bit, he’s currently crying ]]**  
**IH: [[ that was a lil bit harsh, momo ]]**  
**FC: << I’m feeling a little bit harsh right now. >>**  
**FC: << How are you, injury-wise? >>**  
**IH: [[ uhh i got a couple of knives to the arm but otherwise i should be fine ]]**  
**IH: [[ the medication had me a little high and i called the chief of police a mangy mutt and threatened to throw down ]]**  
**FC: << ... >>**  
**FC: << You. >>**  
**FC: << You called the Hosu Chief of Police, who just allegedly saved your ass, a mangy mutt and threatened to fight him. >>**  
**IH: [[ yes ]]**  
**IH: [[ that is exactly what i did ]]**  
**FC: << What are we going to do with you? >>**  
**EE: {{ THROW HIM OUT A WINDOW }}**  
**FC: << No. >>**  
**IH: [[ i wanna try it ]]**  
**FC: << No! >>**  
**FC: << I’m glad Midoriya is with you two. >>**  
**IH: [[ also speaking of midoriya ]]**  
**EE: {{ SHOUTO’S GOTTEN A LITTLE GAYER AND I HONESTLY CAN’T BLAME HIM. }}**  
**EE: {{ THEN AGAIN, I’M FAIRLY CERTAIN HALF THE GUYS IN THE CLASS ARE AT LEAST A LITTLE GAY FOR MIDORIYA. }}**  
**IH: [[ that was not what i meant ]]**  
**FC: << Can one of you please elaborate. >>**  
**IH: [[ 1. he can use his power without breaking his bones now and it’s fucking awesome ]]**  
**IH: [[ 2. he has stain’s (y’know, notorious for his ‘only the best heroes aka all might are worthy) approval as a hero bc his heart is pure or some shit but anyway it's great because thats prob the only reason he's alive ]]**  
**IH: [[ 3. he’s a lot more... threatening looking then i gave him credit for ]]**  
**EE: {{ THE WORD YOU’RE LOOKING FOR IS HOT, SHOUTO }}**  
**IH: [[ yeah, you’re actually right about that ]]**  
**FC: << I’m going to sleep and reading over this log in the morning and then I’m going to talk to you both when I’m not twenty seconds from a motherly instincts-induced meltdown. >>**  
**\-- fortunateCreation [FC] is idle --**

 **\-- fortunateCreation [FC] began pestering soundwaveAmplified [SA] at [22:56] --**  
**FC: << Please tell me you aren’t doing something stupid. >>**  
**SA: bad day huh**  
**FC: << Mhm. >>**  
**FC: << The incident at Hosu has me a bit shaken up. >>**  
**SA: oh shit u wanna talk about it**  
**SA: those things are goddamn terrifying**  
**SA: also was i seeing things or were midoriya and todoroki and iida there when stain was arrested**  
**FC: << You weren’t seeing things. >>**  
**FC: << I’ve heard from Iida that they’re alright. >>**  
**SA: apparently endeavor bailed them out of dying**  
**SA: hes kind of a dick but to hell if he aint a good hero**  
**FC: << Hmm. He’ll never gain my good favor, but I have to admit he’s efficient in his work. >>**  
**FC: << I’m surprised the Hosu heroes let it get that bad. >>**  
**SA: according to the news the league of villains was responsible for those things**  
**SA: theyre like the one at USJ**  
**SA: but more**  
**SA: and weaker apparently**  
**FC: << Oh dear. >>**  
**SA: well actually**  
**SA: this is a bit of a depressing topic to end a bad day on**  
**SA: hows your internship been goin**  
**FC: << Horribly. >>**  
**SA: oh damn whats up**  
**FC: << So! You might see me and Kendou from Class 1B in some advertisements soon. >>**  
**FC: << Catering to this- this celebrity of a hero is humiliating. >>**  
**FC: << She chose us because she thought we were ****_pretty_** **. >>**  
**SA: i mean you are but thats beside the point**  
**SA: wtf man**  
**SA: i know how much you wanted to get into the field and do stuff on your internship. that sucks**  
**FC: << Regretfully. >>**  
**FC: << Thankfully for me, I do have Kendou to suffer with. >>**  
**FC: << We’re both uncomfortable with it. >>**  
**SA: shes the hands one right**  
**SA: yaoi hands**  
**FC: << Gwslnfgkbjkrut5tgvn >>**  
**FC: << Do ****_not_** **say that. >>**  
**SA: but its true though**  
**SA: smacky smacky yaoi hands**  
**SA: keeps monoma at bay**  
**FC: << I hate you. >>**  
**SA: suuuure**  
**FC: << You realize that we’re in the same room, and if you continue being ridiculous I can just show her? >>**  
**SA: wait shit**  
**SA: dont**  
**SA: please**  
**SA: i am begging you im on my hands and knees at this very moment begging you to not do this**  
**SA: momoooooo**  
**SA: i can see that smug look on your face right now you dork**  
**SA: well i mean not literally but you get the point**  
**FC: << I’ve decided to spare you. >>**  
**SA: literally fight me**  
**FC: << No. >>**  
**SA: boooring**  
**SA: anyway i have**  
**SA: a request**  
**FC: << ? >>**  
**SA: .**  
**SA: wouldyouliketocosplayrosemarywithme**  
**FC: << Asdfghjkl >>**  
**FC: << Yes! I’d love to. >>**  
**FC: << I assume you would be Rose? >>**  
**SA: akwdbruf yeah im the edgy one**  
**SA: plus youre like**  
**SA: graceful as shit but also look like you could easily take a mans head off**  
**SA: kanaya energy**  
**FC: << I feel honored. >>**  
**FC: << I wonder... >>**  
**FC: << How many people in our class have read homestuck? >>**  
**SA: well everyone in the trolling gc for one**  
**SA: uhhh the terrible three**  
**SA: prob uraraka**  
**FC: << Todoroki and Iida as well. >>**  
**SA: no shit?**  
**FC: << No shit. >>**  
**SA: damn**  
**SA: iida dont seem like the type to like homestuck**  
**FC: << Are you kidding? >>**  
**FC: << I have pictures of him in Equius cosplay from when we were twelve and traveled to America together. >>**  
**FC: << It was quite cute. >>**  
**SA: he would make a good eq huh**  
**SA: does he still have the cosplay**  
**FC: << :O >>**  
**FC: << Are you thinking what I’m thinking? >>**  
**SA: class cosplay**  
**FC: << Class cosplay! >>**  
**FC: << This is going to sound a little odd, but imagine Sero as John and Hagakure as the Breeze. >>**  
**SA: holy shit**  
**SA: youre a fuckin genius momo**  
**SA: i kinda want to make kiribaku be davekat**  
**FC: << Hmmm... I feel they’d be better as Jadekat, obvious ships aside. >>**  
**FC: << Kirishima’s too sweet and chipper to be Dave. >>**  
**SA: oh damn you right**  
**SA: uraraka as feferi**  
**FC: << Yes, that’s perfect!! >>**  
**FC: << The Dekusquad would make a good trio. >>**  
**FC: << Nepeta, Equius, Feferi. >>**  
**SA: who do you ship with equius**  
**SA: cause we gotta make sparkle sparkle man dress up as em**  
**FC: << I feel like he would make a good Eridan. >>**  
**SA: ooh u right**  
**SA: oh damn**  
**SA: theres a hostage situation downtown so i gotta go but i can talk to you later**  
**FC: << Oh, good luck! >>**  
**FC: << <3 >>**  
**\-- fortunateCreation [FC] ceased pestering soundwaveAmplified [SA] [23:45] -**  
**SA: .**  
**SA: <3**

 **\-- twinklingStar [TS] began pestering existentialEngine [EE] at [24:05] --**  
**TS: Oh, mon cher!**  
**TS: I saw that you were in Hosu during the incident.**  
**TS: Are you alright?**  
**EE: {{ AS MUCH AS ONE CAN BE, I SUPPOSE!! }}**  
**EE: {{ ENDEAVOR CAME AND SAVED US BEFORE STAIN COULD DO TOO MUCH DAMAGE. }}**  
**TS: S- Stain.**  
**TS: As in Stain the hero slayer villain.**  
**EE: {{ YES. }}**  
**TS: Tu vas me donner une crise cardiaque un jour, mon cher!!**  
**TS: Thank goodness Endeavor was there.**  
**TS: Who do you mean by ‘we’?**  
**EE: {{ ME, TODOROKI, AND MIDORIYA WERE ALL IN HOSU. }}**  
**TS: !!!**  
**TS: How did they get there?**  
**EE: {{ I ACTUALLY HAVE NO CLUE }}**  
**EE: {{ TODOROKI OBVIOUSLY CAME WITH ENDEAVOR, BUT MIDORIYA JUST SEEMED TO SHOW UP. }}**  
**TS: His internship hero must have been** **very irritated.**  
**EE: {{ OH BOY HE WAS. }}**  
**EE: {{ IT WAS THIS FAST OLDER MAN WHO LOOKED LIKE HE DIDN’T WANT TO BE THERE. }}**  
**EE: {{ IF MIDORIYA DIDN’T LOOK LIKE HE WAS TWENTY SECONDS FROM PASSING OUT I’D THINK HE WAS ABOUT TO GET SMACKED. }}**  
**TS: Amdnmelrkfrbbbtguifnttilwg**  
**TS: And for good reason, mon cher!**  
**TS: That boy keeps getting himself into trouble.**  
**TS: He needs to stop acting like a sweet yet idiotic anime protagonist because how many times has he broken his bones now?**  
**TS: Four? Five?**  
**EE: {{ HA, THAT SOUNDS ABOUT RIGHT. }}**  
**EE: {{ HE TRIED TO THROW HANDS WITH STAIN, IF YOU’LL BELIEVE IT. }}**  
**EE: {{ STAIN WAS LIKE ‘YOU’RE GOING TO BE A GOOD HERO BUT SIT THE FUCK DOWN’ AND KNOCKED HIM OUT }}**  
**TS: Language, mon cher.**  
**EE: {{ OH, SORRY. I’M STILL A BIT SHAKEN UP. }}**  
**TS: Make sure to drink lots of water and get rest! I’m sure you want to be in tip-top shape by the time school starts again, knowing you.**  
**EE: {{ YOU ARE CORRECT! }}**  
**EE: {{ IT IS MY DUTY AS CLASS REPRESENTATIVE TO SET AN EXAMPLE FOR THE CLASS TO FOLLOW! }}**  
**TS: Vous faites un travail formidable jusqu'à présent.**  
**TS: I don’t think we could have wished for a better class representatives, with you and Yaoyorozu.**  
**TS: You both shine and sparkle like stars for the class!**  
**TS: (Although no one will sparkle like moi)**  
**EE: {{ THANK YOU! }}**  
**EE: {{ HOW HAS YOUR INTERNSHIP BEEN GOING? }}**  
**EE: {{ I KNOW YOU WERE RATHER EXCITED ABOUT WORKING WITH THE LIGHT HERO }}**  
**TS: Oh, of course! Lady Seer is an excellent teacher.**  
**TS: Mlle Lalonde a un tel drame! Un tel style! Un match parfait pour une étoile scintillante comme moi.**  
**TS: Her personality is more Tokoyami-esque than I expected, but I have learned much about the ups and downs of hero work from her guidance.**  
**EE: {{ SHE SOUNDS LIKE A WONDERFUL INFLUENCE! }}**  
**EE: {{ I AM PERSONALLY STILL AWESTRUCK THAT YOU GOT TO INTERN WITH THE HERO THAT INSPIRED ROSE LALONDE. }}**  
**TS: Ah, me as well!**  
**TS: She allowed me to take some pictures with her to show to the class, as so many of us are fans.**  
**TS: Her demeanor is shockingly like the character.**  
**TS: Ah, and she comes calling now!**  
**TS: Amour et au revoir, mon cher!!**  
**\-- twinklingStar [TS] ceased pestering existentialEngine [EE] at [01:23] --**  


**\-- existentialEngine [EE] began pestering defyingGravity [DG] at [01:54]--**  
** EE: {{ DO YOU SPEAK ANY FRENCH? }} **  
** DG: o0o Iida. **  
** DG: o0o It’s one in the morning. **  
** DG: o0o I didn’t know it was even possible for you to stay up this late considering the bags you get under your eyes for staying up past ten. **  
** EE: {{ I’M ON MEDICATION AND ALSO PREOCCUPIED. }} **  
** EE: {{ NOW, BACK TO THE QUESTION. }} **  
** DG: o0o I don’t, but translation software exists. **  
** DG: o0o What’s Aoyama saying now? **  
** EE: {{ I DID NOT SAY ANYTHING ABOUT AOYAMA. }} **  
** DG: o0o It was implied, Iida!! **  
** DG: o0o Why else would you need to speak French, to impress a girl or something? **  
** DG: o0o Impress a certain... blonde-haired navel-lasered friend? **  
** EE: {{ NO!! }} **  
** EE: {{ STOP ASSUMING THINGS WITHOUT KNOWING THE CONTEXT OR YOU’LL MAKE MISINTERPRETATIONS OF THE SITUATION!! }} **  
** DG: o0o Ah, there’s my Iida. **  
** DG: o0o Now, what do you need translated? **  
** EE: {{ THE PHRASE ‘MON CHER’ }} **  
** DG: o0o Give me a moment!! **  
**\-- defyingGravity [DG] ceased pestering existentialEngine [EE] at [02:47] -**

**\-- defyingGravity [DG] began pestering twinklingStar [TS] at [02:49] -**  
**DG: o0o Hi Aoyama!**  
**DG: o0o There’s this really cute girl from another school interning here and I want to flirt with her, what’s French for ‘my dear’?**  
**TS: En quête de romance, je vois!**  
**TS: ‘My dear’ would be ‘mon cher’**  
**DG: o0o >;]**  
**DG: o0o > ;]**  
**DG: o0o >;]**  
**DG: o0o Taken to calling Iida ‘dear’ now, I see!!**  
**TS: VOUS SOURNOIS PETIT BÂTARD-**  
**TS: You truly are a devious one, Uraraka.**  
**DG: o0o I have my charms!**  
**DG: o0o Now...?**  
**TS: ...**  
**TS: Cela lui va mieux que les autres. Doux et amical.**  
**DG: o0o That’s... surprisingly romantic of you.**  
**TS: Ah, the trials of the heart.**  
**TS: One cannot be sparkly and mischievous all the time, can they?**  
**TS: It’s a befitting title for one so inherently good.**  
**TS: And that’s not even talk of his personality!!**  
**DG: o0o I think you should talk to him about it at some point instead of calling him pet names in a language he doesn’t understand.**  
**TS: I don’t believe I am brave enough for that yet.**  
**TS: Alas, I must leave again!**  
**TS: Please don’t tell him.**  
**DG: o0o I’ll find a workaround.**  
**DG: o0o Good night!**  
**\-- defyingGravity [DG] ceased pestering twinklingStar [TS] at [03:03] --**

 **\-- defyingGravity [DG] began pestering existentialEngine [EE] at [03:05] --**  
**DG: o0o Okay, I’m back!!**  
**DG: o0o According to our local genius, ‘Mon cher’ means ‘dear friend’**  
**DG: o0o ...**  
**DG: o0o Iida?**  
**DG: o0o Oh, you probably fell asleep.**  
**DG: o0o Hehehehe.**  
**DG: o0o G’night, Iida. Sleep well.**  
**\-- defyingGravity [DG] ceased pestering existentialEngine [EE] at [03:26] --**

 **[temporary trolling team] [09:43]**  
**\-- proudTail [PT] is online --**  
**PT: do we have all of the nicknames and assignments set up**  
**\-- fortunateCreation [FC] is online --**  
**FC: << Mhm! I have a document with the overall idea and individual assignments laid out in case anyone gets off track. >>**  
**PT: okay, good**  
**\-- invisibleAttacker [IA] is online --**  
**IA: REMEMBER! DO NOT USE YOUR QUIRKS! TYPE IN A WAY THAT’S UNFAMILIAR TO YOU, TRY LEETSPEAK OR SOMETHING.**  
**PT: yeah**  
**PT: also please don’t use your actual handles dammit**  
**PT: we set up the number system for a reason**  
**\-- soundwaveAmplified [SA] is online -**  
**SA: so are we cleared to go here**  
**PT: mhm**  
**SA: hell yea**  
**PT: now lets put our phones away before aizawa-sensei notiVGE3EVRYKFE4VF**  
**\-- proudTail [PT] is idle -**

**\--**

**“If you all are going to be on your phones while I’m talking, then please be subtle about it. Now, anyone in the...” Aizawa muttered, rubbing his eyes to clear away some confusion about what he was reading. Nope, this was actually a memo dedicated to an elaborate trolling endeavor, complete with a Yaoyorozu-organized google doc and assignments. He would be impressed if he wasn’t so damn tired.**

**“... triple T group chat, please turn in your phones. You’ll get them back at the end of the day if I feel like it. Don’t try to hide yours Hagakure, I can see you on here-“**

**A ripple of groans and giggles swept through the classroom as almost half the class got up and handed their phones to him. Some of the handles were easy to guess and surrendered theirs easily (proudTail and invisibleAttacker weren’t exactly creative) but Aizawa had to use process of elimination to hunt down quietConversation, aka a sweating and nervous Kouda. By the time he’d gotten everyone the students that still had their devices were in stitches.**

**Aizawa heard Kaminari stage whisper to Ashido next to him, “I wonder what triple T stands for?”**

**“Maybe it’s a group name.”**

**“Well no shit, Mina, but what is it?”**

**“Kaminari, Ashido, you get to go next.”**

**The laughter in the room intensified, and Aizawa let himself smile softly as they sat up in their seats and got ready to answer.**

**\--**

**\-- neuralNeko [NN] began pestering proudTail [PT] at [14:56] --**  
**NN: Hey, are you doing anything this afternoon?**  
**PT: actually no**  
**PT: whats going on**  
**NN: I got a reservation for two at the opening of this cat café for my birthday, and eichi had a scheduling error and can’t go now.**  
**NN: And I know you like tea.**  
**PT: mmm tee**  
**PT: yeah id love to go?? mind sending me the address**  
**NN: Oh, yeah.**  
**NN:** **KittenCafeGrandOpening.tif**  
**NN: It opens at like 3:30 but just show up whenever.**  
**PT: got it**  
**\-- neuralNeko [NN] ceased pestering proudTail [PT] at [15:03] --**

 **\-- proudTail [PT] began pestering invisibleAttacker [IA] at [15:04] --**  
**PT: TOORU I NEED HELP**  
**IA: HOLY SHIT WHAT HAPPENED**  
**PT: i think shinsou just asked me on a date but not really**  
**PT: or hes just being vague on purpose because hes a dick**  
**PT: either way im meeting him at a cat café in like forty minutes**  
**IA: OH I’M SO PROUD OF YOU, YOU FUCKIGN,,,,**  
**PT: are you crying**  
**IA: A LITTLE!**  
**IA: I’M HAPPY FOR YOU!! THESE ARE HAPPY ‘MY MOIRAIL GOT A DATE’ TEARS**  
**IA: ANYWAY, YOU NEED TO CHANGE.**  
**PT: you don’t even know what im wearing**  
**IA: I KNOW YOUR FASHION SENSE ISN’T DATE WORTHY**  
**PT: its not even an actual date!**  
**PT: your girlfriend had something come up and couldn’t go**  
**IA: OH, YEAH, SHE TORE ONE OF THE MUSCLES IN HER LEG AND HAS TO GO TO THE DOCTOR.**  
**PT: oh shit, tell her i hope she gets better**  
**PT: also im wearing the same thing i always wear**  
**IA: SHORTS AND A T-SHIRT.**  
**PT: ...**  
**PT: no**  
**IA: MASHI**  
**PT: n -no?**  
**IA: COME OVER TO MY DORM WITH A PAIR OF PANTS YOU CAN ACTUALLY WEAR, MINA AND I ARE GOING TO MAKE YOU LOOK CASUALLY BADASS**  
**IA: ASAP!**  
**PT: this better not take all day, the walk is like ten minutes**  
**IA: YEAH, YEAH.**  
**\-- proudTail [PT] ceased pestering invisibleAttacker [IA] [15:06] --**

**\--**

**Hitoshi sat in the booth with a soft smile, one hand on the tea sitting on the table in front of him and one on the cat in his lap. The cats seemed to like him. There were at least four sitting in his little area and watching the rain patter down outside.**

**The bell attached to the top of the door rang, alerted him to someone entering the store, and he peeked over the booth to see a slightly damp Ojiro. The most noticeable thing was a big, yellow raincoat. Hitoshi waved him over, and he felt his face flush as Ojiro padded over with a dopey grin. “Hey Shinsou.”**

**“Don’t sound so surprised that I’m here, idiot, I did invite you.”**  
  
**His laughter rang out softly (like a chime, Hitoshi thought) as one of the cats in the general area meandered over to examine the fluff on the end of his tail. “You really do like cats, huh.”**

 **Hitoshi accepted the change in conversation. “Are you kidding? I** **_love_ ** **cats. They’re just... so elegant? They have the feeling like they’re always watching you but you get that feeling of satisfaction when they like you because you have to earn their affection. Also I attract them somehow? Like, wherever I go there’s just stray cats, all over the place.”**

 **He realized halfway through his cat appreciation rant that he was rambling. His glance up to see if Ojiro was still playing attention was met with a fond expression and the giggling attention of two waitresses nearby. Hitoshi’s ears and face heated up. The obvious course of action here was to keep talking and pretend nothing happened.**  
**Being an idiot, that’s obviously not what he did. Instead, lowered his head to table and decided that he was simply going to die and escape the situation altogether.**

**“Ha. You okay?”**

**“I am fucking peachy, tailman.”**

**“Rude.”**

**“I am a pillar of darkness and negative feelings.”**

**Something poked the top of Hitoshi’s head. “You’re sitting in a cafe full of cats and talking about how much you love them.”**

**“No I’m not.” He responded, sitting back up and giving the offending poker a glare. It seemed ineffective. “You’re actually dreaming, and I am but a figment of your imagination.”**

**“Whatever you say, cat furry.”**

**“I take offense.”**

**“Mhm. Sure.”**

**They sat again for a while in comfortable silence. As the rain beat on the windows Hitoshi let himself glance at the boy sitting across from him. Said boy was currently preoccupied with a spotted cat who had taken an interest in his hair, and Ojiro was trying to get it off without getting scratched.**

**Shinsou’s first thought, to his dismay, was that that outfit decidedly did not belong to Ojiro.**

**Like seriously, he’d met the guy. His sense of style consisted of shorts and a T-shirt, usually for some band Hitoshi had never heard of or one of those free ones they gave out at athletic events. The hipster jacket over T-shirt with what looked like earrings and patches on his jeans was not at all something Hitoshi thought tailboy would own. If anything it had “Hagakure dragged me into her room for a makeover” written all over it.**

**(And no, Hitoshi was not taking to opportunity to admire the fact that even though he’d bulked up a bit in the past year, Ojiro still looked like he could pick Hitoshi up and throw him. Not at all.)**

**He was staring, though. And when Ojiro’s eyes met him he realized he was still staring. The light dusting of pink against Ojiro’s cheeks prompted him to say, “I have complete confidence that outfit doesn’t belong to you.”**

**Ojiro gaped for a second like a fish before saying nervously, “Haha, yeah, Tooru dragged me into my room earlier under the pretense of ‘As your moirail I’m not letting you leave to dorm like that’ and apparently she had gotten clothes for me at one point?”**

**“That sounds like her.”**

**“Mhm. Kazeonsei done anything like that to you?”**

**“Okay, so once,” Hitsohi starts out, grinning impishly, “I have this headband, it’s plastic and yellow and it’s got little triangle cat ears on it. And she got me this thing for** **my birthday maybe a year or two ago when we first met because she knew I liked cats a whole lot.**  
****

**“And on the last day of middle school we had like a little celebration the night before and I was wearing these things and when I woke up I did my hair and put them back on thinking, ‘Okay, she usually tells me to take things like these off before we go to school because she’s the best sister’ and I forget about them. And y’know how people are really mean sometimes?”**

**Ojiro nodded, taking a sip of his tea and leaning in.**

**“So we go to school and the entire day I’m getting really strange looks and I’m thinking, ‘Okay, it’s the last day of school, I’m never seeing these rude losers again, whatever.’ And I get a lot of weird looks anyway cause y’know, I’m the brainwashing kid, don’t talk to him or he’ll brainwash you, yadda yadda. So I don’t think much of it.**

**“And as it turns out not only was I wearing this cat ear headband the entire day but at some point the night before one of the little kids in the home had drawn cat whiskers on my face in permanent marker so I was walking around, all day, in cat ears and cat whiskers and when I finally got home and she told me I was so embarrassed.”**

**Ojiro snorted into his drink and laughed, causing Hitoshi to further bury his face in his hands. “I dunno, I think that’d would have been pretty cute. Were they like, good cat whiskers?”**

**“No, they were terrible little-kid-with-a-sharpie cat whiskers- is your tail wagging?”**

**True to Hitoshi’s eyes, Ojiro’s tail was in fact wagging like a dog’s. His face went bright red like a cherry and he grabbed it, but the damage was done in Hitoshi’s mind.**

**“No, it wasn’t-“**

**“That’s adorable, what the fuck-“**

**“If you tell anyone I am going to murder you slowly and painfully.”**

**“Mm, I’d like to see you try.”**

**Ojiro scoffed at the confident look in his face. “Please, Shinsou, you’re built like a twink, I can carry you like a picnic basket. I have carried you, dammit, at the Sports Festival.”**

**“Ah, no fair, you had Eichi there.”**

**“She barely did any of the carrying. And don’t mention Aoyama either. He’s fast, yeah, but he’s not exactly strong.”**

**“... Holy shit, you’re right.”**

**The silence shifted from comfortable to suffocating, awkward at the shift in conversation. Hitoshi took a sip of his own tea (which had gone mostly forgotten, attention** **given to the cats) and petted the calico next to him.**

**“Did- Did you actually think what I did was stupid? During the Sports Festival?”**

**Hitoshi felt his fingers hesitate at his side, glancing down at the cat next to him to quell some of the anxiety that had come bubbling up at the question. She provided a grounding point as she purred under his touch, causing his words to come out level. “That’s a little out of the blue.”**

**“When you apologized back then you didn’t answer it, and its been bothering me a little bit.”**

**“Then yes. I think it was a stupid thing to do.”**

**“Hey-“**

**“I’m not done,” he said, holding up a hand, “yeah, it was a dumb thing to do, but just because I think it wasn’t smart doesn’t mean that it was the wrong decision. You obviously wanted to prove yourself, and deciding to be proud and bow out because you felt moving on wouldn’t adhere to your personal morals was you saying that you wanted to prove to yourself that you could move on. And honestly? That’s not stupid. That’s actually really admirable.**

**“It seems like... a very heroic thing to do.”**

**He looked up, hesitant, and was instead met with Ojiro on the verge of tears. “That was- so much better than the apology you gave.”**

**“Well, to be fair, I half-assed the apology because I kind of just wanted to die.”**

**“Mm, mood. Thank you, though. Means a lot.”**

**One of the girls Hitoshi had noticed giggling from before approached them, notebook in hand and looking nervous. “Um, Hi, haha. Are you two from UA?”**

**Ojiro smiled and waved at her as Hitoshi scooted at bit behind him in an effort to not be seen. He hadn’t noticed that they had been getting closer, but now they were** **practically sitting next to each other. Ojiro’s tail had also somehow managed to find its way back around Hitoshi’s waist protectively. “Yeah, we go to UA!”**  
****

**“That’s so cool! I just wanted to wish you good luck in becoming heroes!!”**

**“Oh, well thank you!”**

**She giggled again and ran back to her friend, prompting Hitoshi to let out a relieved sigh. Ojiro looked amused. “Not good with people, huh.”**

**“Eh. People usually tend to shy away because ‘Oh no, don’t talk to him, he’ll brainwash you and make you do horrible things’” He muttered sarcastically, glancing back at** **the pair of girls, “So I don’t talk to people who don’t already know me and know I’m not going to make them jump off a building or something.”**

**“God, that’s horrible! Do people actually do that?” Ojiro muttered, visibly distressed. Hitoshi hated it when people got that angry-pity look to them, but it was usually to Eichi for being near him. It was a new thing for him.**

**“Hey, chill, it’s not a big deal. I mean, Brainwashing is a pretty stereotypically villain thing. It’s not like I have an issue with people leaving me alone. I got books and cats and Eichi, what else could I need? ‘Sides, there’s tons of kids with weird quirks that have it worse. Take Eichi, for example. Had to wear a muzzle for years and years before she got into UA because if she talks without it she can like, destroy buildings. There was also this kid in my elementary school who had a mutation quirk, kinda scaly-looking and got bullied a lot cause of it.”**

**“... And the teachers just- allowed it?”**

**“They don’t get paid enough to care usuall- ow!” He yelped at the tan, fluffy Maine coon that had scratched his arm. “You’re not allowed to do that, dumbass.”**

**“You just called a cat a dumbass for scratching you.” Ojiro pointed out.**

**“Yeah, because she’s a dumbass.”**

**“She’s a cat.”**

**“So? Cats can be dumbasses.”**

**“Mm. Hey, you know how it’s 13/4, right.”**

**“How could I forget?”**

**Ojiro lazily slurped the last of his tea and turned toward Hitoshi with a mischievous sparkle in his eye. “We’re having a Homestuck cosplay evening tonight at the 1A dorms and Tooru wanted me to ask if you wanted to come.”**

**“Hell to the yes, what the fuck. How many Homestucks are there, even?”**

**“Most of the class. It’s weird.”**

**“Mhm. Well then yeah, I’d love to. What time?”**

**“I’ll text you when it’s starting. Yaomomo and Jirou were going around town and doing those ‘Eat this in under and hour and get it free’ competitions and then Yaomomo’s** **making a lot of the stuff.”**

**He giggled at the implications of that. “She’s a genius.”**

**“Mhm. Cosplay is serious business.”**

**“Oh, absolutely.”**

**They both finished up their tea and filled the air with excited and hand gesture-filled conversation as the afternoon meandered away. It was the happiest and calmest Hitoshi had been in a long, long time, and he blamed it on Ojiro. Not that it was a bad thing, of course. He was just so easy to talk to, a good listener and talker in way that Hitoshi couldn’t be. It was easy to see why Hagakure liked him so much.**

**They had to go do other things eventually, though (in Hitoshi’s case, pick his local idiot up from the doctor), so he and Ojiro paid and petted the cats for the last time and** **split up at the door with a promise to come back later with Eichi and any facepaint he had.**

**For once in a long time, he didn’t dread the occasion.**

**\--**

**\-- neuralNeko [NN] began pestering sunshineSurroundings [SS] at [16:12] --**  
**NN: I’m on my way to pick you up.**  
**SS: ‘Kay!**  
**SS: The doctor said that I should be fine, but if I keep going on the rate I’m going my legs are either going to get really fucking buff or just stop working.**  
**NN: For fucks sake, Eichi.**  
**NN: You tell that to Hagakure or I will, and she’ll make sure you start taking rests sometimes.**  
**NN: Also there’s a Homestuck cosplay thing tonight and Ojiro told me you’re invited.**  
**SS: When did you talk to Ojiro?**  
**SS: Wait.**  
**SS: Did you ask him on a date?**  
**NN: Why am I not surprised.**  
**NN: No, whatever the fuck Hagakure told you is wrong.**  
**SS: But you asked him to come to the cat café with you.**  
**NN: Yes.**  
**SS: Toshi.**  
**NN: Mm?**  
**SS: You realize that’s like, a thing that people going on dates do.**  
**NN: Yeah.**  
**SS: So you asked him on a date.**  
**NN: No.**  
**SS: You’re insufferable, you know that.**  
**NN: Yes, yes I do.**  
**NN: And it wasn’t a date. I simply had a reservation for two and one was off getting checked out because she pushed herself past her limit and suffered the consequences.**  
**SS: Hhhh I said I’m sorry about it.**  
**NN: You could’ve gotten really hurt!**  
**SS: You said cosplay thing?**  
**NN: As if Hagakure didn’t tell you all about it.**  
**SS: Guilty as charged.**  
**SS: She said she wants you as Gamzee since you’re purple themed.**  
**NN: So who would you be?**  
**SS: She didn’t say, actually.**  
**SS: I’d be happy to just help with hair and makeup.**  
**NN: Mhm, sounds like you.**  
**NN: I’m here.**  
**\-- neuralNeko [NN] ceased pestering sunshineSurroundings [SS] --**

**\--**

**“-AND THE WINNER IS YAOYOROZU MOMO ONCE AGAIN!!”**

**The small crowd that had gathered around the food stand cheered and whooped as Momo finished the last of the large plate of food in front of her with a satisfied sigh. Koyoka had chosen this one and was standing to her side, grinning like it was the end of the world.**

**She hadn’t planned to spend most of the day at restaurants in town, winning their large eating prizes. All she had known is that she would have had to gain some fat to make all of the supplies for tonight’s cosplay. Bakugou’s half-serious suggestion turned into Koyoka’s excitement turned into Momo’s thrill (and since one thing led to another, this was her fifth such task of the day)**

**One of the younger guys in the crowd whooped and held his hand out for a high five. “That was** **_awesome_ ** **, how did you even do that?”**

**“I did it to spite someone who suggested it as a joke.” She responded shyly, eliciting another laugh from the crowd.**

**“Yo, Momomomo, we gotta head back to the dorms ‘fore Aizawa-sensei does checks.” Koyoka muttered, tugging at her jacket sleeve with a gentle smile. “Also, Bakugou doesn’t believe you did all of it, so we have to show him the certificates and pictures.”**

**“Oh, right.” She said quietly. “Have a good day everyone!”**

**The crowd watched her leave with a sigh as she and Koyoka spirited away, back toward the dorms in time for evening check-ins. At the same time, she got a message notification on her pesterchum, and she flipped it open with some confusion.**

**\-- candymanStrength [CS] began pestering fortunateCreation [FC] --**  
**CS: O— hey, yaoyorozu, mind explaining why ive been to three restaurants today that all say your name like some kind of speed eating folk legend**  
**FC: << ... >>**  
**FC: << Satou? >>**  
**CS: O— the one and only.**  
**FC: << Oh, okay! >>**  
**FC: << I’ve been doing eating challenges around the city for fun and to gain weight for supplies to cosplay with tonight. >>**  
**CS: O— not gonna deny that’s genius**  
**CS: O— how many did you do though, holy crap**  
**FC: << By my count it’s been five. >>**  
**FC: << I have won all of them. >>**  
**CS: O— im literally crying they all look so bewildered**  
**CS: O— kouda said that he wants you to know that hes impressed with your dedication**  
**FC: << Oh, thank you! >>**  
**FC: << Initially Bakugou-kun suggested it as a joke, but I did it anyway to spite his nasty attitude. >>**  
**CS: O— a true hero**  
**FC: << Hm! >>**  
**FC: << Make sure you two get back in time for check in, alright? >>**  
**CS: O— we will**  
**CS: O— don’t want to risk the parental wrath of aizawa-sensei**  
**CS: O— seeya yaoyorozu**  
**\-- candymanStrength [CS] ceased pestering fortunateCreation [FC] --**

**“Yo, Momo, who was that?” Koyoka asked curiously.**

**“Oh, that was Satou. He and Kouda said that they were going to explore vegetarian and vegan options in the city and apparently we’ve become, and I quote, ‘Speed-eating** **folk legends’.”**

 **“As you should. I literally have not seen anyone eat a burger that size in that kind of time. It was** **_glorious_ ** **.”**

**“Ha, thank you Koyoka.”**

**They walked back to the dorms, trading chatter about Homestuck and their days and internships. Momo took the opportunity to admire the girl excitedly explaining her internship next to her. The way her hands gestured around to explain her words, the way her eyes glittered in a way that contrasted with her edgy appearance, the contrasting care and indifference put into the way she looked, all things that made Momo’s heart flutter.**

**They made it back to the dorms in the nick of time, earning a tired glare from Aizawa-sensei and getting to watch Satou and Kouda get lectured for arriving a whopping ten minutes late. They both looked quite sheepish.**

**As soon as he had left with a promise to come back for the evening check-in, Jirou slammed her hands down and yelled, “HOMESTUCKS, WE START NOW.”**

**Mina and Tooru whooped in delight, and Todoroki shot up from his quiet conversation with Midoriya. The rest of the room looked varying shades of excited and confused.**

**Koyoka continued, “We’re having a cosplay night to celebrate 13/4, and Momo and I have suggestions about which characters y’all should be. Terrible three, looking at you.”**

**Mina groaned and looped her arms around her boyfriends with some difficulty. “Can we be our fantrolls? Pleeease?”**

**“Momo?”**

**“I don’t see why not! I’d need reference photos for the horns and outfits, though,” Momo responded, then turned to whisper to Koyoka, “It’ll be fun, since we couldn’t place all of them.”**

**“Ugh, fine. The rest of you have government-assigned kins, though, so don’t go asking.”**

**Bakugou scoffed from where he was leaning against the wall, and Momo was sure he would have left if it wasn’t for Sero’s blocking the door. “What the fuck does ‘government-assigned kin’ mean, 3D printer ripoff?”**

**The room of students was silent for a moment, then nearly everyone said in unison, “Karkat.”**

**“Who the hell is Karkat?”**

**“You but shorter and less competent.”**

**“Fuck right back to the power station you came from, Pichu McQueen.”**

**“Wow, harsh.” Kaminari said with a huff.**

**Momo clapped her hands to get everyone’s attention again and held up a sheet of paper. “Let’s get started.”**

**\--**

**\-- proudTail [PT] began pestering neuralNeko [NN] --**  
**PT: its starting**  
**NN: ‘Kay, Eichi and I will be there in ten.**  
**NN: Tell Yaoyorozu we have face paint, okay?**  
**PT: will do**  
**\-- proudTail [PT] ceased pestering neuralNeko [NN] --**

**\--**

**When Hitoshi got there, the room was full of grey face paint and everyone looked like they were having fun. Eichi looked just about ready to burst with a smile he couldn’t see, and he decided to let her find Hagakure as he drifted around the room aimlessly. Fortunately for him (or unfortunately, depending on how you see it,) he was quickly apprehended by Jirou and told to sit down in a chair near a mirror. “We’re going to make you Gamzee since you’re tall and we don’t have him yet.”**

**“I think I’d make a better Eridan, being, y’know. Violet.”**

**“German sparkle party is already Eridan.”**

**“G- what?”**

**“German sparkle party. Aoyama. Navel laser.”**

**“Oh, okay.”**

**She helped him apply the paint with precision and threw a pair of baggy clown pants and a sweatshirt at him with an order to go change. When Hitoshi glanced in the bathroom mirror to fit the horns on, he genuinely did look like Gamzee.**  
****

**(He didn’t really want to be Gamzee; Gamzee was a batshit insane villain. Still, he figured he fit the part alright.)**  
****

**Now, Hitoshi’s luck was awful. He knew that from the moment the entrance test happened to be fighting robots instead of people. Still, he hadn’t been expecting to smack his head into a large horn as soon as he left the bathroom, or to get knocked out for a few seconds because of said impact, or for the owner of said horn to be Ojiro Mashirao. Who he apparently would never escape.**

**“I am** **_so_ ** **sorry, are you okay? I’m still getting a little used to these horns but I haven’t knocked anyone out yet, is your nose okay-“**

**“Ojiro. I’m fine. Calm down, jeez.” He said, using the extended hand as leverage to pull himself up. “So, Tavros, huh?”**

**“Mhm. They said it fit my color scheme or something, whatever that means.” He answered, rubbing the back of his head with an embarrassed grin. “You make a really good** **Gamzee! The horns look good on you.”**

**“Ha, thanks. I like the mohawk. Looks edgy.”**

**“Of course you would say that.”**

**“What are you implying, Nitram-san?”**

**“Oh I’m just saying that you seem like the type to go on Pinterest and look up emo art because you feel like it.”**

**“You’re right, but you shouldn’t say it,” Eichi said, leaning on Hitoshi’s shoulder with amusement in her voice, “and you two look super cute.” She was wearing a sweater** **that folded over, showing her arms and shoulders, and pink jeans that matched the pink cat on her sweater.**

**“Roxy, huh?”**

**“Mhm! Tooru’s the Breeze, like, y’know, the windy thing that John does.”**

**“Creative.”**

**“You guys look super cool!” Midoriya said, coming up from behind Ojiro in an excited green buzz. His hair was fluffed around two cat-like orange ears so that it looked like they were just a part of his skull, and his skin was gray-green with small makeup freckles that looked remarkably like his own. Hitoshi was impressed with whoever did his makeup. He didn’t have to wait long to figure out who it was, as Midoriya-Nepeta was scooped up by a half-finished Uraraka-Feferi, looking fondly irritated.**

**“Nepeta, I told you to stay still!”**

**“But Ur- Feferi!”**

**Iida, deciding it was an appropriate moment to do so, stepped in and lifted Uraraka-Feferi, who was carrying Midoriya-Nepeta. “I told both of you to stop being so foolish or your paint will come off and I’ll have to help you redo it! Be considerate of those around you.”**  
**They both groaned, causing Hitoshi and Ojiro to chuckle at their misfortune.**

**\--**

**Katuski nearly had the mind to smack Kaminari upside the head so hard he’d be seeing stars for weeks, but as his irritating electric-type acquaintance laughed at his newly black hair he fought to keep peaceful, for Kirishima’s sake.**

**He remembered the fight Kirishima had put up just to get him to come, then to get him to stay, those cheerful eyes pleading him to not run away the moment any of the class failures asked him to participate. He was Bakugou Katsuki, the strongest and the best and the one to win. No amount of ‘cosplay’, whatever the hell it was, would land him in the #1 spot.**

**He regretted giving in to his idiot.**

**“You look just like Karkat! I’m like, legit crying.” Sero wheezed in-between laughs next to him. His horns resembled curved tape that draped down the side of his face, and like Katsuki he was completely covered in grey paint. Unlike Katsuki, he seemed to be enjoying the occasion.**

**“You get twenty seconds to shut the fuck up before you die.” Katsuki generously offered, pounding on the door next to him. “What the fuck is taking you so long, shitty hair?”**

**“Gimme a couple seconds, you whiny baby.”**

**“Fuck you and your shitty webcomic bullfi- bullshit!!”**

**Ashido (adorned with fins and pink-tinted paint) wiggled her eyebrows at Katsuki with a sickeningly knowing look. “Were you just about to say bullfish?”**

**“No, fuck off and die in a hole somewhere.”**

**“Rude!” Kirishima said,** **_finally_ ** **coming out of the room he was changing in and twirling around for them to see. “What do you think?”**

**That was not... what Katsuki had been expecting, to be honest.**

**He figured that Kirishima, being weirdly obsessed with masculine things, would wear some super macho armor or something. Probably something that didn’t involve a shirt knowing him. He wasn’t under the impression that Kirishima would be wearing a big pair of round green glasses and a blue dress with a skirt that flared out like a flower. It’s weirdly cute on someone who doesn’t look like he can wear anything other than muscle T-shirts.**

**“That’s the dumbest thing I have ever seen you wear, and you literally have the stupidest hero outfit ever created.”**

**“Hey, that’s not nice! I think you make a perfect Jade, Kiri!! You’re definitely buff enough,” Ashido huffed as she waved him over, “So now all I have to do is light makeup and you guys can join the finished everybody in the common room.”**

**“Why couldn’t I go before, pancreas face?”**

**“You two are a pair!”**

**“We’re a** **_what-_ ** **“**

**“Hey, calm down Kiri, it’s not like shippy or anything! It’s just that Jade and Karkat are human and patron troll in the comic, so they come as a pair! It’s the same reason Yaomomo and Jirou are together, and Awase and Tetsutetsu are together, and Tsuyu and Satou are together.”**

**“... Oh. Okay!”**

**“Damn, don’t sound so disappointed.”**

**Kirishima let out the vocal equivalent of a keysmash, to the amusement of the group loitering in the hallway. Even Katsuki couldn’t help but chuckle at the tangible embarrassment Kirishima seemed to be emanating. Ashido just tutted and held his face still as she finished the last of whatever makeup she was putting on. “There, you’re clear. Now we gotta get out there for group photos, dammit.”**

**“I didn’t agree to this, racoon eyes!”**

**“Can it Murderface.”**

**“Never, fuck you, I’m leaving.”**

**Katsuki turned away and started to walk off, furious. He wasn’t taking any fucking pictures and he wasn’t doing this because he didn’t understand why they wanted to. Unfortunately for his plan to hide in his room and wash off all of this dumb paint, Kirishima unceremoniously tossed Katsuki over his shoulder and started toward the common room despite gratuitous verbal abuse.**

**“PUT ME DOWN YOU ROCK-FACED HALF-WITTED FUCKMUNCH OF A HUMAN BEING, I’M GOING TO RIP YOU LIMB FOR LIMB AND FEED EACH BIT OF YOU TO SOME ANIMAL SO THERE’S NOTHING LEFT.”**

**“Yeah, yeah, I gotcha Blasty. I don’t think they’re going to make you take any pictures if you don’t want to.”**  
**Fuck Kirishima and how he always knew what the problem was. “If they do I’m blaming you.”**

**“Fine, but don’t singe up my skirt. I want to wear it again at some point.”**

**“... Why?”**

**“’S comfy!”**

**“Just die, you fluffy idiot.”**

**“Aww, I’m fluffy?”**

**“I will** **_literally_ ** **murder you and not waste a day in mourning.”**

**Katsuki hadn’t noticed they made it to the common room until someone hugged Kirishima from underneath him and sent Katsuki tumbling to the ground. In Tetsutetsu’s defense, he did look very apologetic, but Katsuki was also irritated and on the floor and ready to punch Class 1B’s Kirishima bootleg into next week.**

**“Oh heck, Bakugou, I’m so sorry, but you make a very convincing Karkat!! Good use of language.” -The silver boy commented, holding out a hand that Katsuki generously smacked away- “Jeez, okay.”**

**Kirishima giggled ridiculously and patted Tetsutetsu’s back. “He’s just a little angry-“**

**“A little angry? I am goddamn furious. The word angry does not describe the pure, mind-numbing fury I feel everytime I see either of your pathetically adorable faces doing some kind of idiotic task that leaves you, me, or someone in the general vicinity injured. So yes, Shitty hair and Shitty hair bootleg with dumb glasses, I am ‘a little angry’”**

**“... Oooookay! Thank you for that, Bakugou.”**

**Jirou started laugh-crying behind him, and he noted that the room was otherwise silent. “What the fuck are you all staring at?”**

**“You, because that was the** **_best_ ** **fucking Karkat impression I have heard in years and you haven’t even read Homestuck.”**

 **Oh,** **_that’s_ ** **what gained a reaction. The room was immediately split between laughing and angry yelling of the disbelieving kind. Katsuki tuned it out, sitting down and glaring at people who tried get close. “I don’t even know who the fuck Karkat is, so fuck off.”**

**“He’s pretty much you but shorter, dumber, and less likely to explode.” Kirishima said playfully, sitting down next to him and throwing an arm over his shoulders. “A lotta people like him because he’s got this really satisfying character arc, apparently.”**

**“Well, fuck them and fuck this, lets just take these stupid photos so we can get this over with.”**

**“That’s the spirit! Well, it’s not quite the spirit but you’re getting there.”**

**“Hey, hair for brains, shut the fuck up.”**

**He listened to the sound of laughter as they finished getting the camera set up, and as people started lining up for pictures Katsuki didn’t quite scowl at the flash of the lens.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (You're going to give me a heart attack one day, my dear!!)  
> (You are doing a great job so far)  
> (Miss Lalonde has such a drama! Such a style! A perfect match for a glittering star like me.)  
> (Love and goodbye, my dear!)
> 
> (In search of romance, I see!)  
> (YOU SNEAKY LITTLE BASTARD-)  
> (It suits him better. Sweet and friendly.)
> 
> Yes, I did mention a Homestuck character by name. I'm going to make a cameo (or more of a cameo in one case) for each of the beta kids. More of a cameo, you ask, but who could that be. (White hair, red eyes, time manipulation quirk, hmmmm)


End file.
